hey there

first, sorry you're feeling crap. breaking up is never fun. but apparently you didn't know this girl for a long time and thus presumably not very well. i know this sounds terrible right now, but for all you know, you just escaped a disaster! ;)

either way, sounds like you just need to get to know people around where you are and go out and find out how nice the area is. i don't think you should focus so much on age: most glocals activities have a variety of people of all ages and that's the fun part! have you checked out the activities page? choose the city closest to you and i'm sure there'll be loads of things for you to join! and if distance isn't an issue, i know there are loads of very active people in Lausanne, so check out what they're doing tonight!

good luck

Sigh.  Sorry.  This is what is called a learning experience.  Go out, drink a bit too much, talk to lots of people, find someplace with loud music and dance, etc.  Seriously it will be better tomorrow.  

Tomorrow you should read Paul Tudor Jones '  failure speach.  Google will find it.  It's good.

Umar indeed it feels like not living , this  wonderful life especially at this point in time. This kind of thiings happens to show you some obvius and simple facts hidden from you.

First am happy to hear your own admission that you screwed it up yourself, you know what? next time you get another nice girl(I know you dont believe that you will ever get one like her again Even Romeo thought so before Juliet came calling and they fell in love!)

This happens so that you can learn that you are the Captain of your soul, the Driver of your destiny and everything is there in your hands for you to loose yet again.

Abut how you are feeling, crap? Thats a good feeling since the emotional pressure builds you a better person for the next nice girl waiting for you, dont run away from pressure remember always that pressure makes diamonds harder than stone!

I thought I would save you the Google search on Paul Tudor Jones' speach.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/16588637/Paul-Tudor-Jones-Failure-Speech-June-2009

awww that sucks, I know how you feel, but I bet once you go home for christmas you will feel a lot better, seeing familiar faces always lifts my spirits :) Im 23 and still kinda new here too and trying my hardest to find stuff to do, every time I go out though its just so different from home and I dunno Im just not liking it just now! Im very excited for my christmas holiday! And you should be too! Breaks up suck, but you'll get there, i promise :) x

Im in Bern yeh! Add me on facebook if you want and we could meet up sometime - Carla Mulherron x

To Umar and Carla,

Sounds like a shit time. Not a lot anyone says will make you feel better. Time and some new experiences will help.

If you can connect with some of great people here it will make all the difference. Geneva is a little slow and it is always hard to get in with the locals.

Try a couple of the events but start by NOT trying to jump into a relationship. Build some friends and expand your circle. Then you can decide how to balance your social life and the work side of things. At the end of the day (Umar) if you f***ed up the relationship, accept it and learn from it. Don't waste too much time beating yourself up over it.

Have a great break and remember that life is what you make it.

Dr.Cat-- I second that!!  LEtting go of what no londger serves us allows us to receieve what we want as well!

Umar and Carla-- I am unsure if Lausanne is close to you all, yet you are welcome here!  Kirsty175 organises a lot of things and there are plenty of people in your age group at her events.  In fact, most of our events have a braod range, yet hers are more closer to your group.  me, i always feel 29 so am there too!

We are having a christmas drinks party here on Friday 11 December, pool usually every Wed and of course tons of other events.

hang in there, before you know it you shall wake and CH is then home!

xo

carla, if you are in bern, show umar the Altes  Tram Depot, beside the old bear pit. this pub has great food, beer (it's a mini brewery) and great atmosphere. i'm sure after a short time, the world will take on a new image for you all.

cheers,

roger

Hi All,

I am a one person just broke up with my bf yesterday.

Umar, Thank you to sharing your feeling on this site, I can say that in your case is might better than mine because at least you know the reason what to break your relationship (but my case was blinding, I dont know the reason why?, he just said I'm so nice-maybe he dosen't like a nice person :) its funny, right?). Anyway I'm sure you will meet a nice girl and you will have a better relationship, you will not do any mistake again, it will be lesson learn for you. Nobody perfect. Give going on, you still young and have a lot of chance to meet nice people.

Thank you every one especially Dr. Cat for your comment on this, it's very useful. So let me have a deep beath and I will walk out from this situation.

I wish to meet new people to try to going out, I wish to join some activity with all of you.

Hope to see you soon.

Noy

Umar am happy to hear this, as you try to sort out yourself always remember the "Scarcity Principle" and make good use of it and it will never let you down.Simply put live your own life and give her lots of space, too much of yourself on her will go towards suffocating you too!

Always the elements that are rare are always deemed precious, she needs space and love and you to be seen to be in control. If you allow her to think that the world revolves around her(Sorry for being mean but true) then you will be in for another battle since the war is not yet over.

Ever heard the song which says "Theres a danger in loving somebody too much"?

My best wishes