That's the way it should be!! You men have been the dominant sex for long enough!! ;-)

Apex fallacy.  Quit focusing on the 1%.

indeed, that's why I used a ...in order to show I wasn't being completely serious with my statement..Charlie wanted another soap opera!

=)

To add to the first two lions, don't forget the third one. "Divorced".

I can't say I have the answer as to why some men are single, but I strongly feel this is, mostly, a problem with American men.  There is something strange on their approach about women.  It's not unusual to hear an American say "they would rather be alone than deal with a relationship."  Conversely, a Swiss man, doesn't look forward to spending his life alone.  I feel Swiss men, in general, have a different disposition towards relationships. They treat their women with more respect and understanding than American cowboys. They seem to have greater affinity with women than American men do.  I have noticed (and I am not saying all Swiss men are good, but in general) Swiss men are rarely sarcastic about their women.  They rarely make women the butt of their jokes.  I don't feel Swiss men would call it a fun night if they spent it degrading their wives or girlfriends like American men do.  This is not to say Swiss men and women don't have problems.  They do.  And, probably the divorce rate is similar to the US, but the above video, with Bill Maher, is the perfect example of how American men feel about women and this is ingrained in our culture.  

the last line says it all...

;-))

Marcela: Any thoughts on how or why American men became this way?

Someone just needs to set up a glocals group called "Single, straight, goodlooking, emotionally stable, financially-secure, intelligent men looking for a long term commitment." I'm sure we'd get a few members. Then we can plan our first annual meeting.

[picture of empty chairs]

I think, this picture illustrates that such men don't go to meetings. They're busy

I'm still waiting on a Swiss joke.. period.  Let alone one about women.  American men are perfectly fine to date, as is any other nationality,  men will attempt to get away with as much bad behavior as their lady allows.  So if women except men to behave better, than they need to start upping their standards. Besides nice american men usually like nice women too. 

(Languate advisory)

Heres a Swiss Joke for you Lexi.........

In short words: Swiss men are boring. (not all, of course)

Doesnt count if its ABOUT the Swiss.. there are plenty of those!

THis is completely ridiculous! HOw can you pigeon-hole all men from an entire nation!!! As if in a country so vast, all men behaved the same! I mean, the idea that all American men are cowbo... oh? American men? Uh-hum... right, I'm Canadian, that doesn't count does it? I mean how could it! We eat pancakes not hamburgers! We don't think the US is just another province or territory! Ha ha!!! I mean, we are like so completely different! God I'm releaved.

So, I withdraw my comments. Feel free to continue pigeon-holeing! Long live the Swiss and the true North Strong and Free!  

Hmm...Swiss men are boring?  Have you dated a Swiss men?

women are just as bad

no hard feelings but altogether Swiss people are little boring.....:P

Please enlighten me, am I misunderstanding or am I correctly reading not very positive reviews about Swiss people?  Help!

dunno about the men, but here's a few ideas as to why ladies might prefer to stay single..

I think you are reading correctly! It's a theme here on glocal to dis the Swiss and Switzerland. Same old same old... to complain that they are boring, etc etc... I just love how we can generalize entire nations from a few (or perhaps even many (nohting wrong with that)) experiences. I mean, heck, perhaps it's fair, there are only say, what, 8 million Swiss out there, assuming half are men... hey, yeah only 4 million give or take. Yeah, I know at least 10 Swiss people, and that's a lot for an xpat! Yeah, they just MUST be all similar to those I know! Hmmm... At least we can agree it's much more logical to dis Swiss men than cowboy Americans, who outnumber them by oh say 20x! In that case we'll just need more statistics. Let's get dating! Yeehhhaaa!!!

Hey, while we're in the theme here... check THIS out. Dissin' the Swiss is nothing new!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2XTuc6i1Uo

This thread is not for Swiss people, but since I made a statement before, I would like to add, based on looking at the people in general, Suisse are workoholics and love winter sports. But you dnt see them drunk  on road at midnight or later, they are too sophesticated  and never do crazy things like Scotts. My comparison was based on my experience with Scottish and Swiss culture...:P

I don't agree to say that it all has to do with the culture, being Swiss or American. Some men are bad everywhere in the world, no matter were they come from. And some men are good, no matter their country of origin. 

Nothing to do with Swiss.... Once again, I'll say it, as many times as I'll have to, but it has nothing to do with the people of a country, it has to do with certain individuals, from any countries in the world. Why always shrink our opinions to say that it has to do with a certain nationality? I used to do the same, but I grew up since then...... And I'm very happy about it.

Amazing... How did you know it would work?

It reminds me the saying;

"Men are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken.."

I do not think that it is a matter of men or women, of citizenship or culture, not even of being bad or good. It is just that real love doesn't happen every other week ! Finally, the only issue is when "you wish you were" (single)... 

Why single?

the single men are still waiting for a reason to give up that single life .... ;)

Some men are single because they enjoy the comfort of being accessible. Relationships can be interpreted by some people as being tied down to the fullest. Theoretically, it's understandable that certain essential stuff (i.e. being faithful) should be adhered to, but at the same time, the emphasis is so much in a relationship that sometimes, it leads people to do stuff they don't want to do. Bottom line, men are single because they either haven't met the right one, enjoy the free life or are extremely lonely. Not because they can't keep their d**k in their pants. Just my opinion anyway

Clearly there are many reasons why men are single... career, sex, playing with your toys when you want, wealth creation, dating sexy girls etc etc etc...

BUT one of the main (highly underestimated) reasons that "ONLY MARRIED, and FORMERLY MARRIED MEN "will understand is......

"THE MOTHER IN LAW"!!!!!!!!! 

 Aren't you a little bit severe with women German?

all the excuses for staying single can magically disappear in an instant..

i am not severe, this is just the result of my experiences with lies, being cheated

and the other point is, that it is hard to find someone who fits. e.g. i am One of These boring guys who likes to go skiing and windsurfing on the weekends and i don't hang around drunk in the streets at midnight(at least Not so often) ;-)

Nazli I think it's a common place we often hear!Reality is much more complex isn't it?

Maybe, maybe not

It's quite miracle two people like each other at the same time.

I mean maybe it's in their fate to meet that person, and others don't have that

Also dependent on what you want. 

You get what you wish for

Here's a joke about Swiss by Swiss :)

Why do we Swiss men always use 3 condoms?

For the one in the middle to remain clean...

PS I lied, it's not even a joke That's what we are taught in schools.

G___ your vid reminded me of this one... (apologies to those that have seen it before).

very true - but you are being polite

as a man its hard not to enter any interaction with a woman without being totally cynical...sadly most women prove to be blatant liars BS-ers deluded or plain crazy...most women are looking for honesty in a man - maybe because they lack it themselves

Sweeping arm jestures of generalization here!.

Wow.

Sounds like you have been very hurt in the past - lots of women DON'T fit your description above,believe it or not.

Get positive!

May I send you all my best wishes for this New year of the Water Dragon :)

was it just me...or did anyone else find that sublimely sexual?

guess it was only you :P   :P

guinness for lunch...bad idea

yeah, pervert! 

To answer Charlies original question:

The reason why some Men are single....

Luck, careful planning and a good escape route

I have 5 kids in my house - I have neither luck or planning skills and I think my escape route is snowed in.

@Marcela Jackowski - Swiss men aren't sarcastic about women??? OK those must be the other Swiss men that your talking about.. not the ones I know.

Please while you are talking about respect to women remember women got the vote is the USA in 1920, UK 1928, Canada 1919 (except Quebec held out to 1940) Germany 1919, France 1945 and Switzerland started in 1959 and only completely accepted women voting on a cantonal level in 1991. Technically Women were allowed to vote on a Federal basis from 1971 but Appenzeller held out for 20 years..

And the most common comment I have heard from Swiss men is that Appenzeller gave women the vote to quickly.

lol

and there's a saying in French Switzerland when a man wants to know if his friend comes with his wife:

"tu viens avec ta remorque?"

I don't think it's funny in English (probably not even in French, since it's Swiss...)

We Swiss men manage to be extremely boring and extremely macho at the same time... which is quite a rare exotic combination

And my guts tell me it's why so many people want to come and live here with us

Ha ha ha - I can't believe you didn't get the coded message in that.That's so funny!!!

Er...  Too much Guiness (?), are you Irish? ;).  It was cOol, wasn't it?

I hope it made everyone's day and that you are all cheering up now, eh eh

Bye 4 now

Maybe

its not for the cheap housing :) or that Schabziger cheese... Possibly the worst thing i have ever eaten.

Schabziger is the reason you should not sterotype a country - The sterotype for switzerland is Good Chocolate, Good Cheese - Try Schabziger you will at least review your Cheese beliefs.

"coded"...christ Im Irish and had a liquid lunch... it would have to be in capitals and underlined, and have references on the side and answer pages in the back for me to crack that "code"....

Haaaa,

You crack me up Charlie! You remind me of a (tall dark haired, very good looking Irish lawyer) colleague of mine. I said: in my country, we eat before going out drinking to which he replied: "what for?" and kissed me. Was that to warm me up in the middle of Soho in January or to remain single?

Because of American women obviously haha Im a duel citizen..Swiss and American so I guess you can only blame half of me for that one LOL

So all single guys out there have a whale of a time and date sexy women every night of the week, come on......

Marcela

we often say in Europe that it is better be alone than in a bad relationship. My version of it - I dont stay in lukewarm rel.ships either....

So, I suppose it is nothing American about it, or let alone a male syndrome.

I also know non-US women who are fond of the US guys and Swiss can be equally good, boring or bad. 

The trick is to find the right one....

Yes, I do.

Confimed - never seen so confusing/confused men before I came here.  

But sure the cheese, the chocolate, the view, the lake makes it up  

Yes, I was well aware about this issue.  But, equality in voting or equality in political issues is a different matter from a personal relationship between a man and a woman.  Regardless, my personal preference is for Swiss German men.  

BTW, while we are on this subject, any handsome Swiss German man around?  LOL

Men are more respectful here hahahahaha...there's only a cabaret on every corner here. Where did they come from???

We tend to attract the people who'll fit our own attitude, behaviour and character. 

I started to attract the right kind of man when I started to respect myself and have confidence in me. It takes time, but it's possible for those willing.

He has a point,doesn't he?

And don't forget women only got the vote here in the.........1970's!!

ha ha....well said.

Mind you,prostitution is pretty big business here so.....

The only answer to this question can be found with Darwin...

Over generations of suffering some men have grown longer legs, and sharper senses

Me I have short legs, I am overwieght, smoke to much and can't spot the danger signals, hence I have 5 kids (what a catch I am).

These heros of our gender have evolved, they can run away faster and spot danger, they are the Gazelles of the human race, hence why some men are single.

Occasionally (just like Gazelles) one gets caught and domesticated and shows the major flaw of our gender  - pettiness. This is why we tell all our single friends to get married settle down and have kids - this is not generous advice but rather just proof of the expression "Misery loves company", or in simpler terms if I am going to suffer so shall you.

I assume that Charlie started this thread to see how he could avoid relationships?

OMG-this is so depressing - is everyone in a couple miserable???why does relationship=imprisonment for some people?

If that's been your experience,something was surely wrong in your set up.It isn't like that for everyone.Some of us construct equality-based relationships,believe it or not.....which aren't based on tired stereotypes and where both are free.

By the way,there are plenty of single men out there who are NOT gazelles....far from it,alas

Why are some men single?

Maybe because there are some who are afraid of commitment. According to what I experienced, I think that some men tend to suffer more of a relationship failure, so they stop taking risks and prefer to have fun from time to time without thinking about the consequences. Some women, in the contrary, will move on and believe in love again, no matter what. They'll take risks one more time, and if it doesn't work, they will try again, until they find the right one, if they do..... 

This is not a generalization, everybody is different but I tend to believe this is true for some men, no matter their nationality or race.

Charlie, I believe you started this topic, are you single?  If yes, would you like to tell us why you are single?

it doesn't have to do anything with being afraid .... there must be a good reason for such a commitment, and in my opinion  there is only one reason for that, I have to feel it ...and unfortunately this doesn't happen very often ;)

When it comes to commitment, I'm not sure feeling it would be enough..... But I'm glad to hear that you are not one of the men I'm talking about, then! :-)

I guess many of us who know Charlie in person know his story/his actual marital or apres marital status as well and also that as a long standing glocals member sometimes he makes jokes, start threads just to shake us up and engage in conversation....

But if you are so curious, you can ask him in a pm plus you also can reveal why you are so much looking for a Swiss German guy on glocals that is definitely not a dating site....

Since you seen to be new, just to direct you: swissfriends is a dating site.

Why some men are single?

This is a reason :

This one is funny. 

Please don't take my comments on this forum post seriously...

In fact I you any mans comments seriously on this subject your on a dangerous road. We don't talk about feelings publicy.

The conversations and comments of men will be either derogatory or for laughs and if that puts you off men, you are in for a very hard time.

I have 2 sisters, 4 sister in laws and 4 daughters, I have heard their conversations about men and guess what, they are more rude and derogatory than Men.

These threads ALWAYS turn into an attack on men - "fear of commitment", "sleeping aound" etc... which always leads to an attack on women "seeking perfection", "changing men until they are no longer men" etc...

Please don't expect serious answers off a forum that started with 2 lions doing the wild thing and calling it single life.

Why are these threads depressing to those who take it seriously?

Simple they are started for fun and if us "long-termers" gave you a serious honest answer about our relationships you would be seriously depressed.

Don't believe me?

you asked for it...

For almost 8 years I have had a beautiful Spanish/Cabo verdean partner who speaks 4 languages, is a hard worker and we still have time for a great social life with our friends and families, with parties that have lasted up 3 days (over xmas) with over 40 people in our house.

We have 5 children ranging between 2 and 18 years old (not all are mine) who entertain and infuriate but always make life fun. My children are my world and we are protective parents to all of them.

I have had to make some sacrifices for my family, such as the country I loved , my businesses, and friends. But I would make the same decisions again.

I occasionally miss the freedom of being single, but only for a minute and can't help thinking about those who can't find a partner - whats wrong with you? are you just a desparate loser? Are you so perfect that you can afford to be that picky? If you want that perfect partner are you prepared to change enough so that you are worthy of them? and do you really want a man that is that much of a girl?

We are making plans that encompass more than the next 8 years, so I hopefully won' be joining you losers anytime soon,(just joking) oh and yes after our sex life is still great.

Was that fun for all you single people seeking luurve?

If your single and enjoy it great!

If you are single and are just desparately seeking your next relationship you probably aren't ready, after all if your not happy by yourself how are you ever going to make someone else happy?

Don't forget the main reason people move here is for there career, that often is most important thing in Swiss expats lives. Families are really difficult to balance with careers. Seriously if you have a child, when they are ill they come first and the client/organisation/company will just have to wait.

Are you ready for that level of commitment?

Will you put your career on hold for your partner and children?

Seriously don't take these forum posts seriously

My $.02 finally.  Economic theory applies here. One of Mankiw's laws states that people respond to incentives.  In modern anglosphere society the incentives for men to quit catting around have been removed.  If you render superfluous the role of the male as a stable protector and provider, don't act shocked when men refuse to step up and fulfill that role.  

Sorry I hate explaining to supposedly bright people that a daft comment like "Single men are like gazelles" is a joke.

My story is a long one, and probably quite dull.

To answer your question, yes, twice married, Im a walking disaster when it comes to long term committment, I have faults even I can recognise. It stems (so I have been told) from my mother dying when I was a baby (1yr old) and being abused (locked in cupboards etc) by nannies when I was a toddler, and hence I have an inherant underlying mistrust of women in some situations (not for faithfulness, but for "disappointment of the abuse of my trust"). Im learning (albeit slowly) to overcome this and not generalise all women into the "disappointment" bracket, its a process....

Im not a jealous type at all, if someone is going to stray (ie a partner) then worrying about it is not going to stop it, and if it has already happened, then worrying about it is redundant. What happens , happens... I deal with it then and there, not before.

Will I marry again...probably not. Why? You ask...well, simply because Im very happy with who i am, I do enjoy life, someone told me once that i live life at 100kmph...and was hard to keep up with. In hindsight, its probably true.

I have children, who come first. above everything else.... Am I a good father, I hope so, I think my kids know I love them, and bless them, they are patient with me.

Im ready for the downs in life  (and by God there have been a few) because they make us stronger as individuals, and I enjoy the "ups" to their fullest, because they dont last.

Im not a difficult person to understand, nor am I difficult to get along with...Im happy with myself primarily, and realise that self improvement is always nessessary. that again is a process ;-)) and im lazy here... but thats no big deal.

In single life I am quite happy going to a pub/bar on my own, and happy to talk to anyone who is willing to listen... Im also comfortable going home alone... and no I dont need to visit prostitutes as Buzz aluded to, nor cabarets.... firstly I dont like these establishments, since theyre like casinos, made to make money for someone else, and i dont feel comfortable with sponsoring the mafia, and the abuse of the girls makes me sick to the stomach.

A good night out doesnt have to be surrounded by models... but that would certainly ice the cake... Im no George Clooney thats clear , nor a "gazelle", but I do generally have great interaction with females.... I have high standards, and even in my drunkest moments Im willing to hold out for the ones that catch my eye... I dont "mass date"... I cant afford it firstly, and secondly I find banal conversation boring in a one to one scenario... there has to be a "spark", very important is "laughter in the eyes"...a great smile, intelligence and of course great legs and ass.... then Im interested.

I am a dreadful "flirt" (so I have been told) ... but its innocent (mostly)... I am simply "ME"... and I dont really care what poeple think of me, you either like me or you dont, if you dont ...fine... there are other people I can spend time with, The only opinions that matter are those of my kids and of my close freinds...

I enjoy laughter because it is a better ice cutter than the best body...

As to the picture I posted at the top of this thread.... It made me laugh firstly, and secondly it kind of made sense to me, and my life so far, in marriage I felt caged, I felt that "choice" was taken from me, and that compromise was pretty much all mine, so I changed it, and am no longer married/caged/without choice/and compromise is mine to decide... Im having more fun now, and feel free....

Will I feel the same in 10 or 20 years... no idea.. but so long as I can find a reason to smile, and have people smile at me, and my kids are healthy, then i will be ok.

Does this apply in "general" to others who are single (or married), NO, everyone and their situations are different... Im happy for the happily married friends I have, and happy for the "happily single" ones.... the ones that are miserable in either marriage or singledom, those are the ones that need to recapture the laughter, and need to change thier situation.

Many people (women especially) have biological fears of being single ... no kids, no partner, alone in old age... I can understand this... Im lucky. i have kids, and great freinds so i wont be alone... but some of you will, so I understand the fears, and the subsequent desparation.

To those that are reading this whilst being married, who are miserable... firstly be confident in yourself... when you truely "like" (not love) yourself and have the confidence to speak to random people, to enjoy yourself without bounds, then you will soon find that the fear of lonelyness and solitude (that keeps so many people in a relationship that isnt working )will disappear and  help you fix your problem.

It boils down to fear, we all like to be "liked", we all dont want to be "alone"... but once you define what "lonelyness" is and are happy with yourself, and happy with freinds then youre not lonely... stop worrying about the small things in life, and concentrate on what matters.

I used to be very single minded and probably shallow... now after learning to open my mind and embrace the world as it is I have found that it offers up so much more than we have the time to appreciate..... single life, allows me to talk to anyone without recourse, without guilt...  what I have found out about myself, is that in "singledom" I have a "choice" how I lead my life, and whom I speak to, and whom I date... and as long as its doesnt affect my kids, there is nothing wrong with enjoying oneself fully.

It wont suit everyone... but thats good...if we were all the same, how dull would life be?

Here's a hint (I'm not agreeing with everything he writes...):

FEMINISM

http://www.rooshv.com/7-ways-feminism-is-destroying-american-women

First of all, I apologize to all if my question to Charlie was improper.  

I have not read all previous threads so I didn't know the reason why Charlie was so keen on this question.  And, he has been incredibly kind and mature to give me an explanation, which I not only appreciate and respect but now, hopefully, I can join him "making lemonade when life gives us lemons."  Thankfully, by asking, I can now share the amusement of the forum's theme.  

Regarding your second paragraph, well, I am not looking for a Swiss German guy on glocals.  Nor, am I looking for a date.  I joined glocals because it seems like a nice community.  And, it is good to know this forum has loyal friends like you.

I kindly thank you for directing me to "swissfriends" dating site.  But, unfortunately, I have a Swiss German boyfriend for 5 years.  And frankly, I cannot nor am I interested in having more than one.  

Dear all,
This seems to be a worldwide problem !!
INSTALLING HUSBAND!!!
Read it its really nice…
A woman writes to the IT Technical support Guy

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1 .

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?

Signed,

Reply

DEAR Madam,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: i thought you loved me. Html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed, Husband1..0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2..0 and Flowers 3.5..

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1 .
Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Good Looks 7.7.

Good Luck Madam!

".. Im also comfortable going home alone... and no I dont need to visit prostitutes as Buzz aluded to, nor cabarets..."

Chas ("Buzz" here ) - was not referring to you . That was a general comment in response to something someone else referred to.

Jeez-it gets complicated on here(why does everyone take things so personally??

Thank you for sharing your personal stuff .. 

ha ha thanks frdousi -  this IT story always makes me laugh!

I would replace cooking 3.0 by
exotic cocktails 6.0

http://www.bartime.de/cocktailrezept.sex-on-the-beach.48.html

Hi Charlie, nice to meet you.  I can't thank you enough for being so candid and sharing your life experiences.  Indeed, life seems to give us all challenging reversals.  For sure, I have huge reversals of my own and I think this forum is very interesting and helpful.  In fact, what immediately caught my attention about this forum is the participation/involvement and consideration of the "audience."  This kind of openness or engagement is a novelty to me.  I have lived all my life in NYC (but born in Chile) and feel that we New Yorker's live inside our own fishbowl, albeit, a big one.  

I feel (we?) New Yorkers do not have this je ne sais quoi, that is, the ability to be spontaneously friendly and understanding. People just come and go.  Actually, even when people in NY say “How are you?” it's simply a greeting and not a concern.  BTW, I am not bashing, I am only making an observation!  I am comparing cultures and learning new things.

Meanwhile, you have a great forum.

Let fix this problem.  More gender-reversal...

love it! =D

Bar the american accents this could have shot in Brighton

Marcela...you haven't been married to any Swiss guy and don't know many divorced women who can tell you what it is the meaning of marry a Swiss...

Good luck in your search....

Awesome... I sooo wanna go to this bar.

LOL good one. Same thing happened to me in the surroundings of Bern where I lost my way without navigation. I stopped several times to ask for directions to a few local people... I thought I don't speak Swiss German but I shall be really unlucky not to find anyone who can speak one of the four languages I've learnt... guess what... I got really frustrated as no one seemed to understand me and it took me one hour to find an Asian lady who was living in the area and who could finally help me... then I bought myself a good navigation system... and took intensive German lessons... altough that doesn't help either with Swiss German

First add 10-20kg to each of them, bad clothing, and foul attitudes.  Then I'll be in complete agreement.

Please define boring. What do they have to do to entertain you?

Divorce rates in Switzerland seem to be the 3rd highest in Europe.

In Neuchatel I hear its 60% , with 50+% in Geneva ...

As a result, if youre gonna marry a Swiss man, make sure he's a "Lawyer" rather than a banker, by all accounts and based on these stats the former will be more successful than the latter... ;-)))

Charlie, what does the number 2.8 mean? There's no unit, that I can see.

Yeap. 

I can add that when I got divorced in Hungary from my German husband, I was told by the registry office that 90% of bi-national marriages are ending up in divorce in Hungary.

Would be interesting to see how much of the Swiss mariages are between different nationals.

F

Table 1: Crude marriage rate, 1960-2010
(per 1 000 inhabitants) - Source: Eurostat

pffft...sand gets everywhere...

stop "generalizing"... ;-))))

Funny!  

Error:  I meant to write "Unfortunately, I can't accept the suggestion of visiting swissfriends."  

Fortunately, I have a Swiss German boyfriend for 5 years.  And frankly, I cannot nor am I interested in having more than one. 

Sorry, what search are you referring to?

Chris,

I disagree with you : one does not "deserve" to have 5 children nor "deserve" to go through two divorces : life is "unfair" and, in many aspects,  is out of your control. You just have to take it as a gift vs. complain about it.

Yes, some people will have a high amound of self confidence and "self-love", that help them to more easily love and trust someone else, and some other don't : this is related to one's childhood and parents' history, and whether nice or ugly one does not "deserve" it. You have to accept it, and do your best with it. I once thought that one was defined by the sum of his/her decisions that one had taken, but even this is not so true : there are some decisions that one can profondly regret and that one does not "deserve" to have taken.

So be humble when life is nice with you, be positif when life is tough. You are worth more that what your life is.

freudian....

Thanks. Just wondering if the divorce rate is more informative than the marriage rate?

its not fair asking the "divorced women".... any divorced woman is unlikely to have a great opinion of the national she was married to... I cant imagine for a second my ex (s) are too fond of Irishmen... whether the opinions are founded on reality or not, there is always a bitter taste left over, and however much we try not to, everyone has a generalistic opinion.

Eating sugar leaves a craving for more, but the mind forgets the taste so we need to try more to remember it better.

Eating something badly bitter...we remember it for longer... its natures way of protecting us.

Sorry, what search?

Wow, this is so much fun, it is already becoming addictive...and, it's neither Fattening nor Expensive!   Which reminds me, I haven't had lunch and need to go out to buy groceries.  I wouldn't want to starve my dear Swiss German boyfriend.

Gee, if I had a job I would have to quit work to keep up with this forum!!!

Lots of laughs and fun to all.  

Agreed.. i think its a typo on their part...

link...

http://epp.eurostat.ec.europa.eu/statistics_explained/index.php/Marriage_and_divorce_statistics

Well, since the subject of divorce is up.  My divorce cost me over US$130 thousand and 3 long, long, long, long, long years.  Three long years of been scrutinized by the other partie's lawyer.  Whatever miniscule infraction could be found and invented it was.  Three long years under the NYC Supreme Court's microscope.  Not, that they are not all corrupted, including the judge.  Justice in NY state is as good as your bank account.  As long as you can keep feeding your  lawyer so as to deplete the opposition of their bank account, there is justice.  

Pierre, has correctly stated "life is unfair."  Or, at least, I absolutely agree with him.  Life is very unfair.  And, whether we like it or not, we have to live with it and be thankful for what we have because after going through an endless divorce which left me BROKE and with plans to marry my Swiss German boyfriend tragedy struck.  One week in Augusts past, we went to take all our papers to the Kloten, I guess municipality, to get married.  Just when I thought  the pressure and injustice were over, my boyfriend's son (21) had a fatal fall after returning from a party.  His body was found next morning with his head in a pool of blood.  Although, doctors performed brain surgery, it was to no avail and he was pronounce dead that night.  So, as humans, I think we all try to do the best we can.  And, I wish someone could explain why life is unfair.  Why do we have to go through all these experiences.  It has been two arduous years, but time helps.  Hey, I don't want to get anyone depressed here, but this is all part of being in this world.  Life is unpredictable and unfair.  And, we might as well be thankful for what we have.  Including the crazy, funny pictures of the lions, which makes us laugh. 

Huh? apart from 5 kids whats that got to do with my post?

Personally I was pointing out that we mainly complain as complaining is a lot more fun than saying how wonderful everything is.

Ever hear the one about how wonderful my mother in law is? No. And lets face it , it would be a pretty crap joke...

The point is no one wants to hear how fantastic your life is, as if they aren't in the same place, its almost like rubbing salt in the wound.

As for being happy with yourself - This isn't self confidence, this is straight forward common sense. I know so many people who try and fix their problems with a new relationship, and are so surprised when it doesn't work out. If you aren't happy with or by yourself how will you make someone else happy? This dosn't mean you reach perfection but rather you change those traits about yourself you can't accept and accept those flaws you can't change.

What I will say is behind EVERY good longterm relationship there is loads of hardwork, sacrifice and difficult times. The difference is that in facing and accepting your own faults, you are probably ready to accept someone elses.

My partner and I talk, argue and fight through our issues, sometime we have to agree to disagree

And after all of this a relationship can still fail by no fault of anyone..

As for "deserving" are you deliberately mis-quoting me?  Where did I write about deserving?

Sorry your post has left me confused

Charlie,

I have a good opinion of my former Swiss husband.... but I have many Swiss acquaintances...

Ok this thread is doing the spiral thing - I'm outta here...

ill drag it back into the humorous box then....

lets play true or false.... Charlie quiz time...

True or false on the following pictures (feel free to generealize)?

because they get more bored than women.

All true Charlie! Or so it seems...

For the depressed single ones... technology has the answer

How to tell if a man is single? True for right handers.

so far we analysed this problem only from one side ... that the males are afraid of commitments ...

but there is also the counterpart :-) and I don't have the impression that e.g. Zürich is full of women who are desperately looking for a relationship

Women are not afraid of commitments! Of course there are some exceptions!

ok, then it seems that i meet the exceptions:-)

there are so many Single Woman around, so maybe we have to Start a thread "the reason why some women are single

Heather, I'll ask you the same question I asked Myriam (to which she did not respond): How is that American men got the be this way?  What cultural or social forces, in your opinion, shaped their attitudes toward relationships, commitment, and family?

I think "Half" has something to do with it.......

Hi, did you mean Myriam or Marcela?  whichever.  I will try to explain why I think American men are the way they are.  I believe there are several factors which have contributed to American men’s lack of manner and civility, which in turn spills over to how they treat a woman.  Unlike Europe where a certain way of behaving was required, this enforcement appears to have taken no impact in the US.    

First, as we know, the US was a colony and Europe had well established monarchies.  So, while Europeans held court with all its pomp and curtsies and had to behave as dictated, (otherwise, they would be exiled from the royal courts) the colonies or Americans were just trying to survive.  They were just happy to find food (hence, Thanksgiving, yummy!), never mind having to worry about bowing to the ladies, or having to follow certain European rituals.  I would imagine that self-preservation was on top of the list as opposed to being considerate or polite.   Additionally, it was America’s desire to create a body of government unlike monarchies and make individuality count.  So, fundamentally, even when there was law and order in the US manners and etiquette were never even questioned, i.e., to each its own.

Second, the American frontier was pushed to the west.  During this period of expansion and gold digging, the American men, the way I see it, became even less concerned with manners.  After all, the poor pioneers couldn’t count on aqueducts.  Rivers were the best they could hope for.  Their lives consisted of trampling in the wilderness.  This period was not called the “Wild West” for nothing, wilderness without law.  We’ve all seeing movies of this period where roughness, endurance and guns were the “meat and potatoes.”  Along the way, some individuals became incredibly rich. The American goal.

I believe the iconic “Marlboro man,” minus the cigarette, represents the American man; a masculine, strong, rough-and-tumble kind of guy.  I guess the modern, Wall Street equivalent of the “Marlboro man” is the CEO who puts his feet on the desk, eats a sandwich with his hands, some talk with their mouth full, drinks beer from a bottle, burps and says “excuse me.”

Basically, the US has never been at Europe’s level regarding manners and etiquette.  Attempts have been made in the US, but it’s difficult to catch up with centuries of European written and re-written etiquette.  Europe lost its monarchs, with a couple of exceptions, but the manners and civility remained, which is a great inheritance.  Finally, this is the behavior the US man knows, consequently, how he treats his counterpart.

For women seeking American men willing to start a relationship. Why not do your shopping in Canada instead of down south? I have several very nice single male friends who definately want something committed rather than fleeting but who don't manage to find committed girlfriends (perhaps there's been a mixup across the border?). If interested, please submit your relationship profile, references and requirements to this forum and we will get back to you.

David, you forgot to mention the possibility of free health insurance...  =)

Oh right! Thanks Richard. Of course, there are such benefits. Too many to get into, en fait. For example, along with free healthcare, you also get to watch your man chop down trees with a axe and defend you from the bears like an animal. You don't get sexier than that! ;-) Oh right, and after, smelling like a savage beast, he will carry you through a snow drift, canoe you across the river, build you a fire in his cabin and seduce you to music of Neil Young and Brian Adams. Practical, adventurous, AND sophisticated! Ladies, what are you waiting for!?

...and the beady little eyes and flapping heads.

I am feeling so damn proud now. ;-)

"Step one, lose the gun, step two buy a canoe",  HAHAHHAA

I don't remember you asking me anything personaly.... Or I would have answered. 

I've answered and the reply is in one of the above messages.  Somewhere, along the way you wrote Myriam which created a confusion.  Were you asking both of us?  Myriam and myself?

Sure...except for the Brian and Bryan things...

I have not mentioned anything about American culture so I don't think Richard thought about me on that one.

As I've lived in the US many times and in many places, I sure do have my opinion about it.

I'll only say that there is no way you can generalize on how Americans behave, just like on how European and Swiss do. 

I'm Swiss, but I'm not the stereotype of the Swiss girl. I don't like fondue, I'm not punctual and I don't like to follow the rules. I cross the street where I'm not supposed to and I get fines on the highway....... 

I love to eat with my fingers and talk with my mouth full (yeah, I know.... Bad, bad, bad..). I'm not boring like many suppose the Swiss are, and I like to be social... Most of the time.... :-)

I am just myself.

I met many different people in the US, some who treated me good, some who treated me real bad. There's no way you could say one behavior was linked to the culture or American mentality. We're all humans after all, created with the same needs and desires. We just have all very different backgrounds, type of education and so on. Nothing to do with  nationality. Some use their needs and desires to get what they want, without respecting others'needs and desires. That's just being human. 

Back home, we have a solution to avoid men and women being single. They even built a huge support system around this and invoke a few Gods & positioning of constellations and movements of planets to reason it out to you.

This brings the number of single folks down to acceptable statistics but arranged marriage can work a bit like...the Lotto. Here's an example...