Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
I still don't understand anything abour relationship but I finally write a book!!It's near done!!
An open book!!
Surprise:)
Daniela
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Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Feb 20, 2011 @ 17:12
The text you are quoting:
Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
I still don't understand anything abour relationship but I finally write a book!!It's near done!!
An open book!!
Surprise:)
Daniela
Daniela LFeb 20, 2011 @ 17:12
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 1
Feb 21, 2011 @ 00:22
finding the right one is not that difficult!!!
people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!
The text you are quoting:
finding the right one is not that difficult!!!
people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!
andy o, Feb 21, 2011 @ 00:22
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Post 2
Feb 21, 2011 @ 00:36
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
The text you are quoting:
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
Lexillent, Feb 21, 2011 @ 00:36
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Post 3
Feb 21, 2011 @ 09:12
The right person for us!!
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 4
Feb 21, 2011 @ 09:12
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
Feb 21, 11 00:36
beautiful song!!Thank you!!!:))))
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Post 5
Feb 21, 2011 @ 09:12
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?
The text you are quoting:
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?
Daniela L, Feb 21, 2011 @ 09:12
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Post 6
Feb 21, 2011 @ 12:11
Intersting article about this topic in Psychology today:Great Expectations: The Soul Mate Quest
Marriage is dead! The twin vises of church and law have relaxed their grip on matrimony. We've been liberated from the grim obligation to stay in a poisonous or abusive marriage for the sake of the kids or for appearances. The divorce rate has stayed constant at nearly 50 percent for the last two decades. The ease with which we enter and dissolve unions makes marriage seem like a prime-time spectator sport, whether it's Britney Spears in Vegas or bimbos chasing after the Bachelor.
Long live the new marriage! We once prized the institution for the practical pairing of a cash-producing father and a home-building mother. Now we want it all—a partner who reflects our taste and status, who sees us for who we are, who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be. We've done away with a rigid social order, adopting instead an even more onerous obligation: the mandate to find a perfect match. Anything short of this ideal prompts us to ask: Is this all there is? Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.
Continued...
The text you are quoting:
Intersting article about this topic in Psychology today:Great Expectations: The Soul Mate Quest
Marriage is dead! The twin vises of church and law have relaxed their grip on matrimony. We've been liberated from the grim obligation to stay in a poisonous or abusive marriage for the sake of the kids or for appearances. The divorce rate has stayed constant at nearly 50 percent for the last two decades. The ease with which we enter and dissolve unions makes marriage seem like a prime-time spectator sport, whether it's Britney Spears in Vegas or bimbos chasing after the Bachelor.
Long live the new marriage! We once prized the institution for the practical pairing of a cash-producing father and a home-building mother. Now we want it all—a partner who reflects our taste and status, who sees us for who we are, who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be. We've done away with a rigid social order, adopting instead an even more onerous obligation: the mandate to find a perfect match. Anything short of this ideal prompts us to ask: Is this all there is? Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.
Continued...
Free, Feb 21, 2011 @ 12:11
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 7
Feb 21, 2011 @ 12:52
With all repsect due to the posters, ready made sentences such as "finding the right one is not that difficult, people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!" or "The right one comes when you stop searching." do not help. If it were that simple, we'd all be happily married or engaged. The fact is that we are not, and therfore the problem must be elswhere.
The text you are quoting:
With all repsect due to the posters, ready made sentences such as "finding the right one is not that difficult, people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!" or "The right one comes when you stop searching." do not help. If it were that simple, we'd all be happily married or engaged. The fact is that we are not, and therfore the problem must be elswhere.
Free, Feb 21, 2011 @ 12:52
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 8
Feb 21, 2011 @ 13:11
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
The text you are quoting:
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
rena, Feb 21, 2011 @ 13:11
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Post 9
Feb 21, 2011 @ 13:58
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Even the yoghurt has to reflect my lifestyle and my new lipstick should be immediatelly praised.
And when I am down he has to find exactly the right words to lift me up. And what......? You don't wanna go skiing with me today but.... work?
The text you are quoting:
Even the yoghurt has to reflect my lifestyle and my new lipstick should be immediatelly praised.
And when I am down he has to find exactly the right words to lift me up. And what......? You don't wanna go skiing with me today but.... work?
rena, Feb 21, 2011 @ 13:58
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Post 10
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:22
Jan 1, 70 01:00
no!!!a book about relationship!!
it is an open book because at the end I ask to everyone to send comment to me by e-mail to make a ffed back to this argument!!And then I'm gonna publish just the comment that people send to me!!One other book with some testimonial experience or just tough!!
I asked if you remember because I started it almost 9 months ago and to my question a lot of people answer in glocals..
The question was how difficut it is to find the right one??
:)almost 2000 people comment about man and woman!!
So for this people I just said that I'm gonna publish this book whom I was talking about times ago!!
Daniela
The text you are quoting:
no!!!a book about relationship!!
it is an open book because at the end I ask to everyone to send comment to me by e-mail to make a ffed back to this argument!!And then I'm gonna publish just the comment that people send to me!!One other book with some testimonial experience or just tough!!
I asked if you remember because I started it almost 9 months ago and to my question a lot of people answer in glocals..
The question was how difficut it is to find the right one??
:)almost 2000 people comment about man and woman!!
So for this people I just said that I'm gonna publish this book whom I was talking about times ago!!
Daniela
Daniela L, Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:22
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Post 11
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:30
Jan 1, 70 01:00
I don't know...
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 12
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:33
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
Feb 21, 11 13:11
YES WHY??
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Post 13
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:33
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Very good answer thank you:-)
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 14
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:38
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 15
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:48
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
Feb 21, 11 00:36
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 16
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:51
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 17
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:51
Feb 21, 11 14:38
Non aspettare di finire l’università,
di innamorarti,
di trovare lavoro,
di sposart...i,
di avere figli,
di vederli sistemati,
di perdere quei dieci chili,
che arrivi il venerdì sera o la domenica mattina,
la primavera,
l’estate,
l’autunno o l’inverno.
Non c’è momento migliore di questo per essere felice.
La felicità è un percorso, non una destinazione.
Lavora come se non avessi bisogno di denaro,
ama come se non ti avessero mai ferito
e balla, come se non ti vedesse nessuno.
Ricordati che la pelle avvizzisce,
i capelli diventano bianchi e i giorni diventano anni.
Ma l’importante non cambia:
la tua forza e la tua convinzione non hanno età.
Il tuo spirito è il piumino che tira via qualsiasi ragnatela.
Dietro ogni traguardo c’è una nuova partenza.
Dietro ogni risultato c’è un’altra sfida.
Finché sei vivo, sentiti vivo.
Vai avanti, anche quando tutti si aspettano che lasci perdere.
(Madre Teresa di Calcutta)
di innamorarti,
di trovare lavoro,
di sposart...i,
di avere figli,
di vederli sistemati,
di perdere quei dieci chili,
che arrivi il venerdì sera o la domenica mattina,
la primavera,
l’estate,
l’autunno o l’inverno.
Non c’è momento migliore di questo per essere felice.
La felicità è un percorso, non una destinazione.
Lavora come se non avessi bisogno di denaro,
ama come se non ti avessero mai ferito
e balla, come se non ti vedesse nessuno.
Ricordati che la pelle avvizzisce,
i capelli diventano bianchi e i giorni diventano anni.
Ma l’importante non cambia:
la tua forza e la tua convinzione non hanno età.
Il tuo spirito è il piumino che tira via qualsiasi ragnatela.
Dietro ogni traguardo c’è una nuova partenza.
Dietro ogni risultato c’è un’altra sfida.
Finché sei vivo, sentiti vivo.
Vai avanti, anche quando tutti si aspettano che lasci perdere.
(Madre Teresa di Calcutta)
The text you are quoting:
Non aspettare di finire l’università,
di innamorarti,
di trovare lavoro,
di sposart...i,
di avere figli,
di vederli sistemati,
di perdere quei dieci chili,
che arrivi il venerdì sera o la domenica mattina,
la primavera,
l’estate,
l’autunno o l’inverno.
Non c’è momento migliore di questo per essere felice.
La felicità è un percorso, non una destinazione.
Lavora come se non avessi bisogno di denaro,
ama come se non ti avessero mai ferito
e balla, come se non ti vedesse nessuno.
Ricordati che la pelle avvizzisce,
i capelli diventano bianchi e i giorni diventano anni.
Ma l’importante non cambia:
la tua forza e la tua convinzione non hanno età.
Il tuo spirito è il piumino che tira via qualsiasi ragnatela.
Dietro ogni traguardo c’è una nuova partenza.
Dietro ogni risultato c’è un’altra sfida.
Finché sei vivo, sentiti vivo.
Vai avanti, anche quando tutti si aspettano che lasci perdere.
(Madre Teresa di Calcutta)
Daniela L, Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:51
di innamorarti,
di trovare lavoro,
di sposart...i,
di avere figli,
di vederli sistemati,
di perdere quei dieci chili,
che arrivi il venerdì sera o la domenica mattina,
la primavera,
l’estate,
l’autunno o l’inverno.
Non c’è momento migliore di questo per essere felice.
La felicità è un percorso, non una destinazione.
Lavora come se non avessi bisogno di denaro,
ama come se non ti avessero mai ferito
e balla, come se non ti vedesse nessuno.
Ricordati che la pelle avvizzisce,
i capelli diventano bianchi e i giorni diventano anni.
Ma l’importante non cambia:
la tua forza e la tua convinzione non hanno età.
Il tuo spirito è il piumino che tira via qualsiasi ragnatela.
Dietro ogni traguardo c’è una nuova partenza.
Dietro ogni risultato c’è un’altra sfida.
Finché sei vivo, sentiti vivo.
Vai avanti, anche quando tutti si aspettano che lasci perdere.
(Madre Teresa di Calcutta)
Daniela L, Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:51
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Post 18
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:56
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 19
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:58
The text you are quoting:
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 20
Feb 21, 2011 @ 14:58
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
Feb 21, 11 13:11
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 21
Feb 21, 2011 @ 15:08
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
Feb 21, 11 00:36
this song is what we are looking for...
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Post 22
Feb 21, 2011 @ 15:28
Daniela when and where is the book released?
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Post 23
Feb 21, 2011 @ 15:31
With all repsect due to the posters, ready made sentences such as "finding the right one is not that difficult, people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!" or "The right one comes when you stop searching." do not help. If it were that simple, we'd all be happily married or engaged. The fact is that we are not, and therfore the problem must be elswhere.
Feb 21, 11 12:52
I think the problem is that people do not want to commit!!!
the world is FULL of single people looking for love, but for some odd reason many can't seem to find it.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog and he turns into a handsome prince and they live in a castle happily ever after!!!
Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!! any long term succesful couple will tell you that you need to sacrifice and put up with many things in order to make the relationship work and be long lasting!
the world is packed of people out there looking for love, but don't want to settle with the love that comes their way because they have this pathetic "Sex in the city" type of expectations where their husband needs to be wealthy and go on business trips and have a great body and the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)
I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!! only to get divorced two years later!!! they just want to the honey moon romance that comes with a relationship, when reality settles and arguments come, and sacrifices are to be made, then many want a divorce or a way out!!!! (the easy way) and then complain because they can't find the one!
The text you are quoting:
I think the problem is that people do not want to commit!!!
the world is FULL of single people looking for love, but for some odd reason many can't seem to find it.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog and he turns into a handsome prince and they live in a castle happily ever after!!!
Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!! any long term succesful couple will tell you that you need to sacrifice and put up with many things in order to make the relationship work and be long lasting!
the world is packed of people out there looking for love, but don't want to settle with the love that comes their way because they have this pathetic "Sex in the city" type of expectations where their husband needs to be wealthy and go on business trips and have a great body and the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)
I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!! only to get divorced two years later!!! they just want to the honey moon romance that comes with a relationship, when reality settles and arguments come, and sacrifices are to be made, then many want a divorce or a way out!!!! (the easy way) and then complain because they can't find the one!
andy o, Feb 21, 2011 @ 15:31
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Post 24
Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:04
I think the problem is that people do not want to commit!!!
the world is FULL of single people looking for love, but for some odd reason many can't seem to find it.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog and he turns into a handsome prince and they live in a castle happily ever after!!!
Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!! any long term succesful couple will tell you that you need to sacrifice and put up with many things in order to make the relationship work and be long lasting!
the world is packed of people out there looking for love, but don't want to settle with the love that comes their way because they have this pathetic "Sex in the city" type of expectations where their husband needs to be wealthy and go on business trips and have a great body and the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)
I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!! only to get divorced two years later!!! they just want to the honey moon romance that comes with a relationship, when reality settles and arguments come, and sacrifices are to be made, then many want a divorce or a way out!!!! (the easy way) and then complain because they can't find the one!
Feb 21, 11 15:31
You got it: Why not just replace 'we' and 'people' by 'MEN'?
"....maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice....Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!"
The text you are quoting:
You got it: Why not just replace 'we' and 'people' by 'MEN'?
"....maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice....Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!"
rena, Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:04
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Post 25
Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:15
Keep your eyes open, and keep smiling , and of course take the lable off your forehead that says "lonely and looking"... and the good times will come to you.
Its not rocket science, its nature.
The text you are quoting:
Keep your eyes open, and keep smiling , and of course take the lable off your forehead that says "lonely and looking"... and the good times will come to you.
Its not rocket science, its nature.
Charlie, Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:15
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Post 26
Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:51
Keep your eyes open, and keep smiling , and of course take the lable off your forehead that says "lonely and looking"... and the good times will come to you.
Its not rocket science, its nature.
Feb 21, 11 16:15
What was the subject btw: How difficult is to FIND the right one or to KEEP?
The text you are quoting:
What was the subject btw: How difficult is to FIND the right one or to KEEP?
rena, Feb 21, 2011 @ 16:51
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Post 27
Feb 21, 2011 @ 17:06
You got it: Why not just replace 'we' and 'people' by 'MEN'?
"....maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice....Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!"
Feb 21, 11 16:04
Because that's exactly what I am experiencing with women 
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Post 28
Feb 21, 2011 @ 17:24
Andy O: Well, you may be right, but there is a time-honoured tradition for shooting the messenger, so I'm not sure I'd use these words on a date ("requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations" or "pathetic") about any subject, really ;)
Maybe some people just marry too soon.. or drift apart.. or something else happens. How can you know?
The text you are quoting:
Andy O: Well, you may be right, but there is a time-honoured tradition for shooting the messenger, so I'm not sure I'd use these words on a date ("requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations" or "pathetic") about any subject, really ;)
Maybe some people just marry too soon.. or drift apart.. or something else happens. How can you know?
FerneyL, Feb 21, 2011 @ 17:24
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Post 29
Feb 21, 2011 @ 19:13
David: Commodfied relationship. You are so right! I like the term, I hate the idea.
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story...
If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece of our own jigsaw puzzle than to find a fully completed puzzle with whom to play grownup games (and no, I am not only referring to sex)
So, why don't we find the right one? Maybe because we do not accept him just as he his, or because we expect her to be the missing piece of our life, or we try to coin a triangular shape in a round hole (remember those kids games?), or because we put on him the burden of being what we are not or what we would like to be, or because we do not not let give her the room to be herself and freely give us what she wants rather than what we expect, or… whatever!. But again, there are lucky people who find just that. And if you have not (speaking for myself), you better start your own journey to completeness. It may take a loooong time before you meet your soul mate and it may be much easier to create and nurture the ground on which such a relationship may blossom.
The text you are quoting:
David: Commodfied relationship. You are so right! I like the term, I hate the idea.
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story...
If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece of our own jigsaw puzzle than to find a fully completed puzzle with whom to play grownup games (and no, I am not only referring to sex)
So, why don't we find the right one? Maybe because we do not accept him just as he his, or because we expect her to be the missing piece of our life, or we try to coin a triangular shape in a round hole (remember those kids games?), or because we put on him the burden of being what we are not or what we would like to be, or because we do not not let give her the room to be herself and freely give us what she wants rather than what we expect, or… whatever!. But again, there are lucky people who find just that. And if you have not (speaking for myself), you better start your own journey to completeness. It may take a loooong time before you meet your soul mate and it may be much easier to create and nurture the ground on which such a relationship may blossom.
Free, Feb 21, 2011 @ 19:13
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Post 30
Feb 21, 2011 @ 21:47
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Where did you see them? Being serious from time to time is not a problem and there was noting personal or private in what I said. The "I" was purely generic and including myslef in a "journey to completeness" is merely a way to say that I'm just part of the crowd as anybody else and not lecturing anyone. This being said, pointless comments are indeed pointless and speak for themselves.
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Where did you see them? Being serious from time to time is not a problem and there was noting personal or private in what I said. The "I" was purely generic and including myslef in a "journey to completeness" is merely a way to say that I'm just part of the crowd as anybody else and not lecturing anyone. This being said, pointless comments are indeed pointless and speak for themselves.
Free, Feb 21, 2011 @ 21:47
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 31
Feb 21, 2011 @ 21:54
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
Feb 21, 11 13:11
Ha! ha!... I bet you wouldn't last more than a month in such a relationship. That would be so boring 
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Ha! ha!... I bet you wouldn't last more than a month in such a relationship. That would be so boring
Free, Feb 21, 2011 @ 21:54
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 32
Feb 22, 2011 @ 09:16
What was the subject btw: How difficult is to FIND the right one or to KEEP?
Feb 21, 11 16:51
Rena....you wont "find" unless you smile, have an open mind and stop looking like you need to find someone.... this is just my opinion of course, and no miracle recipe for finding "mr or mrs right".
"Keeping"...requires altogether different skills, but my advice would be, stay the same as you were when the first attraction was there.... and "listen" and "talk", This applies to both sexes, and to every aspect of the relationship.
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Rena....you wont "find" unless you smile, have an open mind and stop looking like you need to find someone.... this is just my opinion of course, and no miracle recipe for finding "mr or mrs right".
"Keeping"...requires altogether different skills, but my advice would be, stay the same as you were when the first attraction was there.... and "listen" and "talk", This applies to both sexes, and to every aspect of the relationship.
Charlie, Feb 22, 2011 @ 09:16
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Post 33
Feb 22, 2011 @ 09:47
Rena....you wont "find" unless you smile, have an open mind and stop looking like you need to find someone.... this is just my opinion of course, and no miracle recipe for finding "mr or mrs right".
"Keeping"...requires altogether different skills, but my advice would be, stay the same as you were when the first attraction was there.... and "listen" and "talk", This applies to both sexes, and to every aspect of the relationship.
Feb 22, 11 09:16
Charlie, how right you are... (in my opinion)
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Post 34
Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:16
Intersting article about this topic in Psychology today:Great Expectations: The Soul Mate Quest
Marriage is dead! The twin vises of church and law have relaxed their grip on matrimony. We've been liberated from the grim obligation to stay in a poisonous or abusive marriage for the sake of the kids or for appearances. The divorce rate has stayed constant at nearly 50 percent for the last two decades. The ease with which we enter and dissolve unions makes marriage seem like a prime-time spectator sport, whether it's Britney Spears in Vegas or bimbos chasing after the Bachelor.
Long live the new marriage! We once prized the institution for the practical pairing of a cash-producing father and a home-building mother. Now we want it all—a partner who reflects our taste and status, who sees us for who we are, who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be. We've done away with a rigid social order, adopting instead an even more onerous obligation: the mandate to find a perfect match. Anything short of this ideal prompts us to ask: Is this all there is? Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.
Continued...Feb 21, 11 12:11
The fact that half marriages fail to stick to their choices and keep them alive, doens't make it a universal rule.
Saying that "marriage is dead" is probably the first stupid thing I ever read from you, Free! 
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The fact that half marriages fail to stick to their choices and keep them alive, doens't make it a universal rule.
Saying that "marriage is dead" is probably the first stupid thing I ever read from you, Free!
Stef__Granny, Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:16
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Post 35
Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:26
"The right one" is a charachter of fairy tales.
The only way of "meeting" and "keeping" the right person(for you) to spend your life with happily ever after, is being one yourself, and remaining it, refreshing your happyness and your commitment, being responsible when it's time to make decisions and stick to them and jolly and light when it's time to enjoy them.
And then there is a rule that I would impose by law: you don't get married as you buy a new toy! You must have lived together -sharing burden and joy- for at least 5 years, before you make the adult step (and sod Churches and virginity!).
Things done in a hurry too often are not double checked enough!(Like my previous post with all those stupid code lines automatically generated by a silly add-on!) 
qtl { position: absolute; border: 1px solid #cccccc; -moz-border-radius: 5px; opacity: 0.2; line-height: 100%; z-index: 999; direction: ltr; } qtl:hover,qtl.open { opacity: 1; } qtl,qtlbar { height: 22px; } qtlbar { display: block; width: 100%; background-color: #cccccc; cursor: move; } qtlbar img { border: 0; padding: 3px; height: 16px; width: 16px; cursor: pointer; } qtlbar img:hover { background-color: #aaaaff; } qtl>iframe { border: 0; height: 0; width: 0; } qtl.open { height: auto; } qtl.open>iframe { height: 200px; width: 300px; }
The text you are quoting:
"The right one" is a charachter of fairy tales.
The only way of "meeting" and "keeping" the right person(for you) to spend your life with happily ever after, is being one yourself, and remaining it, refreshing your happyness and your commitment, being responsible when it's time to make decisions and stick to them and jolly and light when it's time to enjoy them.
And then there is a rule that I would impose by law: you don't get married as you buy a new toy! You must have lived together -sharing burden and joy- for at least 5 years, before you make the adult step (and sod Churches and virginity!).
Things done in a hurry too often are not double checked enough!(Like my previous post with all those stupid code lines automatically generated by a silly add-on!)
qtl { position: absolute; border: 1px solid #cccccc; -moz-border-radius: 5px; opacity: 0.2; line-height: 100%; z-index: 999; direction: ltr; } qtl:hover,qtl.open { opacity: 1; } qtl,qtlbar { height: 22px; } qtlbar { display: block; width: 100%; background-color: #cccccc; cursor: move; } qtlbar img { border: 0; padding: 3px; height: 16px; width: 16px; cursor: pointer; } qtlbar img:hover { background-color: #aaaaff; } qtl>iframe { border: 0; height: 0; width: 0; } qtl.open { height: auto; } qtl.open>iframe { height: 200px; width: 300px; }
Stef__Granny, Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:26
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Post 36
Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:44
"The right one" is a charachter of fairy tales.
The only way of "meeting" and "keeping" the right person(for you) to spend your life with happily ever after, is being one yourself, and remaining it, refreshing your happyness and your commitment, being responsible when it's time to make decisions and stick to them and jolly and light when it's time to enjoy them.
And then there is a rule that I would impose by law: you don't get married as you buy a new toy! You must have lived together -sharing burden and joy- for at least 5 years, before you make the adult step (and sod Churches and virginity!).
Things done in a hurry too often are not double checked enough!(Like my previous post with all those stupid code lines automatically generated by a silly add-on!)
Feb 22, 11 12:26
@Stef_Granny....and again....
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 37
Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:34
Stef_Granny : I'll take that as a compliment :-) 
I do not support the idea that marriage is dead, I was just quoting this article, which, I believe, is full of very interesting ideas. I particularly liked the following passages:
on "stable ambiguity" whereby you park on the border of a relationship, neither in, nor out,
on marriages between people who have a different view of things and where magic is in developing binocular vision, to see life through one's partner's eyes as well as through your own,
on describing marriage as a disagreement machine and the highly romanticized notion we have that, if we were with the right person, we wouldn't fight,
and, last but not least, the description of a relationship as the collision of my humanity and yours and how partners handle that collision determines the quality of their relationship.
Cheers.
The text you are quoting:
Stef_Granny : I'll take that as a compliment :-)
I do not support the idea that marriage is dead, I was just quoting this article, which, I believe, is full of very interesting ideas. I particularly liked the following passages:
on "stable ambiguity" whereby you park on the border of a relationship, neither in, nor out,
on marriages between people who have a different view of things and where magic is in developing binocular vision, to see life through one's partner's eyes as well as through your own,
on describing marriage as a disagreement machine and the highly romanticized notion we have that, if we were with the right person, we wouldn't fight,
and, last but not least, the description of a relationship as the collision of my humanity and yours and how partners handle that collision determines the quality of their relationship.
Cheers.
Free, Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:34
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Post 38
Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:58
Jan 1, 70 01:00
In Switzerland marriage also gives a legal frame to paternity. It's the only way for a father to have full "rights" on his child and to be protected if the mother suddenly goes amok against him...
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In Switzerland marriage also gives a legal frame to paternity. It's the only way for a father to have full "rights" on his child and to be protected if the mother suddenly goes amok against him...
Free, Feb 22, 2011 @ 12:58
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Post 39
Feb 22, 2011 @ 16:20
In Switzerland marriage also gives a legal frame to paternity. It's the only way for a father to have full "rights" on his child and to be protected if the mother suddenly goes amok against him...
Feb 22, 11 12:58
Hmm.. I might be digressing here.. but.. In this case, Switzerland may be ahead of times..
Speaking of amok: In Denmark, for instance, being married is only paper-thin protection for the father, if any. It literally takes a ruling deeming the mother to be mentally incompetent and dangerous if the father can hope to receive custody of the children. Otherwise, custody automatically goes to the mother, if no agreement can be made.
It's no better on the flip side of the coin: A woman, while in marriage, can 'accidentally' become pregnant with another man, and if this not detected immediately, the original husbond becomes financially liable for this child until it is 18 years old - through no fault of his own (it's not even his child) - due to the concept of 'the social father'. No consequences for the mother or the real father, even if the paternity is acknowledged. DNA tests have been dismissed as "irrelevant". So much for rights and reason.
So thank you, Switzerland, if you are doing something to equalize.
This is not to say the problem is wide-spread.. just saying that a study has shown that 1 in 7 children doesn't have the father everyone thought it had. Better odds than in Russian roulette, so why would anyone complain..
I hope this doesn't deter anyone from looking for the right one ;)
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Hmm.. I might be digressing here.. but.. In this case, Switzerland may be ahead of times..
Speaking of amok: In Denmark, for instance, being married is only paper-thin protection for the father, if any. It literally takes a ruling deeming the mother to be mentally incompetent and dangerous if the father can hope to receive custody of the children. Otherwise, custody automatically goes to the mother, if no agreement can be made.
It's no better on the flip side of the coin: A woman, while in marriage, can 'accidentally' become pregnant with another man, and if this not detected immediately, the original husbond becomes financially liable for this child until it is 18 years old - through no fault of his own (it's not even his child) - due to the concept of 'the social father'. No consequences for the mother or the real father, even if the paternity is acknowledged. DNA tests have been dismissed as "irrelevant". So much for rights and reason.
So thank you, Switzerland, if you are doing something to equalize.
This is not to say the problem is wide-spread.. just saying that a study has shown that 1 in 7 children doesn't have the father everyone thought it had. Better odds than in Russian roulette, so why would anyone complain..
I hope this doesn't deter anyone from looking for the right one ;)
FerneyL, Feb 22, 2011 @ 16:20
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Post 40
Feb 22, 2011 @ 16:52
Ferney, the problems are widespread and not limited to Denmark, though Denmark (along with Finland and Sweden) is among the worst...
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Ferney, the problems are widespread and not limited to Denmark, though Denmark (along with Finland and Sweden) is among the worst...
richardm, Feb 22, 2011 @ 16:52
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Post 41
Feb 22, 2011 @ 17:28
Ferney, the problems are widespread and not limited to Denmark, though Denmark (along with Finland and Sweden) is among the worst...
Feb 22, 11 16:52
No mystery, as to why the bithrate is dropping in the Western world (many reasons, but outright legislating it.. human stupidity at its worst).
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No mystery, as to why the bithrate is dropping in the Western world (many reasons, but outright legislating it.. human stupidity at its worst).
FerneyL, Feb 22, 2011 @ 17:28
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Post 42
Feb 22, 2011 @ 21:37
Jan 1, 70 01:00
" i agree the right one comes when you stop searching"
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Post 43
Feb 23, 2011 @ 13:57
Jan 1, 70 01:00
I'm touched...It's right. But how you can't cange if you heve to considerate the life of an other person next to you..??This is easy for 2 friends but for a couple somthimes you what you like and some other times you do what she like..is impossible that you liked the same things always!!so not so easy to find a compromise...for this reason sometimes is easier to be alone..Maybe
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I'm touched...It's right. But how you can't cange if you heve to considerate the life of an other person next to you..??This is easy for 2 friends but for a couple somthimes you what you like and some other times you do what she like..is impossible that you liked the same things always!!so not so easy to find a compromise...for this reason sometimes is easier to be alone..Maybe
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 13:57
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Post 44
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:05
Daniela when and where is the book released?
Feb 21, 11 15:28
is coming!!I'll let you know when I finish to correct it in italian I have to make it traslated in English..and French.
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is coming!!I'll let you know when I finish to correct it in italian I have to make it traslated in English..and French.
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:05
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 45
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:25
Feb 21, 11 14:48
have a look!!
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 46
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:25
I think the problem is that people do not want to commit!!!
the world is FULL of single people looking for love, but for some odd reason many can't seem to find it.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!
Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog and he turns into a handsome prince and they live in a castle happily ever after!!!
Real love requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations!!! any long term succesful couple will tell you that you need to sacrifice and put up with many things in order to make the relationship work and be long lasting!
the world is packed of people out there looking for love, but don't want to settle with the love that comes their way because they have this pathetic "Sex in the city" type of expectations where their husband needs to be wealthy and go on business trips and have a great body and the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)
I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!! only to get divorced two years later!!! they just want to the honey moon romance that comes with a relationship, when reality settles and arguments come, and sacrifices are to be made, then many want a divorce or a way out!!!! (the easy way) and then complain because they can't find the one!
Feb 21, 11 15:31
so the problem is too many expectations??
If I read your post, it seems that the problem is the woman..but sure, we have expectations, who does not has?..!Men have the expectation to find a not complicated or so much indipendent woman who has to undertand his problem his job his stress what Else`? she has to be beautiful...I haven't meet a boy who is not interested in apparence so why a woman has to be different?
The apparence count but the rest make 2 people staying togheter!
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so the problem is too many expectations??
If I read your post, it seems that the problem is the woman..but sure, we have expectations, who does not has?..!Men have the expectation to find a not complicated or so much indipendent woman who has to undertand his problem his job his stress what Else`? she has to be beautiful...I haven't meet a boy who is not interested in apparence so why a woman has to be different?
The apparence count but the rest make 2 people staying togheter!
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:25
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Post 47
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:37
Jan 1, 70 01:00
The 'right one' is whoever we choose to be in that relationship.
YES!!
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The 'right one' is whoever we choose to be in that relationship.
YES!!
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:37
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Post 48
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:37
David: Commodfied relationship. You are so right! I like the term, I hate the idea.
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story...
If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece of our own jigsaw puzzle than to find a fully completed puzzle with whom to play grownup games (and no, I am not only referring to sex)
So, why don't we find the right one? Maybe because we do not accept him just as he his, or because we expect her to be the missing piece of our life, or we try to coin a triangular shape in a round hole (remember those kids games?), or because we put on him the burden of being what we are not or what we would like to be, or because we do not not let give her the room to be herself and freely give us what she wants rather than what we expect, or… whatever!. But again, there are lucky people who find just that. And if you have not (speaking for myself), you better start your own journey to completeness. It may take a loooong time before you meet your soul mate and it may be much easier to create and nurture the ground on which such a relationship may blossom.
Feb 21, 11 19:13
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story..
If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece
...so Right
The text you are quoting:
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story..
If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece
...so Right
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:37
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Post 49
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:23
By finding your carbon copy? :)
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 50
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:25
I must admit: convictable..... (A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
Feb 21, 11 13:11
I, for one, do not want someone to love me for the 'right' reasons, but for all the wrong reasons..
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I, for one, do not want someone to love me for the 'right' reasons, but for all the wrong reasons..
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:25
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Post 51
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:30
I, for one, do not want someone to love me for the 'right' reasons, but for all the wrong reasons..
Feb 23, 11 15:25
totally agree.... bad is good....
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Post 52
Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:56
Jan 1, 70 01:00
This conversation is becoming 'serious'
Yes it is serious, to understand why we have more separed people than happy coupple!!why we prefere to do alone at Be in 2...??!!Why we talk easier by internet that face to `face??:-?
The text you are quoting:
This conversation is becoming 'serious'
Yes it is serious, to understand why we have more separed people than happy coupple!!why we prefere to do alone at Be in 2...??!!Why we talk easier by internet that face to `face??:-?
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 14:56
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Post 53
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:28
Ha! ha!... I bet you wouldn't last more than a month in such a relationship. That would be so boring
Feb 21, 11 21:54
Incidentally, that's why, I have a cat* and not a dog.
(two plus looking after ferals.. but let's not extrapolate.. ok, you will anyway ;)
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Incidentally, that's why, I have a cat* and not a dog.
(two plus looking after ferals.. but let's not extrapolate.. ok, you will anyway ;)
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:28
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Post 54
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:49
its not whats bad for me, its what women percieve as "bad" that normally guys see as good.
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its not whats bad for me, its what women percieve as "bad" that normally guys see as good.
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:49
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Post 55
Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:59
Jan 1, 70 01:00
It's well established, that chicks in one part of their menstrual cycle prefer the caring male, while they, in the brief ovulating part of the cycle, prefer the aggressive male (the 'bad' mate, perceived strong genes).
Does this tie in to the aforementioned 'accidents' with non-spouses? I think so.
What's 'bad'.. see most movies starring bikers.
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It's well established, that chicks in one part of their menstrual cycle prefer the caring male, while they, in the brief ovulating part of the cycle, prefer the aggressive male (the 'bad' mate, perceived strong genes).
Does this tie in to the aforementioned 'accidents' with non-spouses? I think so.
What's 'bad'.. see most movies starring bikers.
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 15:59
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Post 56
Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:20
I just remembered the below question that someone asked in a forum recently:
'If a man is all alone in the woods can he still be wrong?'
It makes me smile when I see all the traps men could step in (and I am a good example to criticize easily).
Poor men - it is not easy at all to please a woman...
And as men can obviously only do one thing at a time: It is not evident to have the charming muscleman who never forgets to bring flowers, listening to our problems while cleaning up....
The text you are quoting:
I just remembered the below question that someone asked in a forum recently:
'If a man is all alone in the woods can he still be wrong?'
It makes me smile when I see all the traps men could step in (and I am a good example to criticize easily).
Poor men - it is not easy at all to please a woman...
And as men can obviously only do one thing at a time: It is not evident to have the charming muscleman who never forgets to bring flowers, listening to our problems while cleaning up....
rena, Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:20
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Post 57
Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:44
I just remembered the below question that someone asked in a forum recently:
'If a man is all alone in the woods can he still be wrong?'
It makes me smile when I see all the traps men could step in (and I am a good example to criticize easily).
Poor men - it is not easy at all to please a woman...
And as men can obviously only do one thing at a time: It is not evident to have the charming muscleman who never forgets to bring flowers, listening to our problems while cleaning up....
Feb 23, 11 16:20
we can multi task.... for sure... its just the cleaning that is the issue... its not in our genes.
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we can multi task.... for sure... its just the cleaning that is the issue... its not in our genes.
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:44
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Post 58
Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:56
we can multi task.... for sure... its just the cleaning that is the issue... its not in our genes.
Feb 23, 11 16:44
Sounds ok, when can we meet?
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Post 59
Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:58
we can multi task.... for sure... its just the cleaning that is the issue... its not in our genes.
Feb 23, 11 16:44
I agree with that... but I can delegate the cleaning to others while doing something else...
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I agree with that... but I can delegate the cleaning to others while doing something else...
Andrew I, Feb 23, 2011 @ 16:58
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Post 60
Feb 23, 2011 @ 17:06
Sounds ok, when can we meet?
Feb 23, 11 16:56
ha ha... you'll find me being rascally in 7 Arts , or a range of other bars/clubs across town.
Actually there is live music on tonight if any of you "looking for the love of your life people" want to come... i doubt you'll find your love there, but it would be fun.
I'll be at the bar,
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ha ha... you'll find me being rascally in 7 Arts , or a range of other bars/clubs across town.
Actually there is live music on tonight if any of you "looking for the love of your life people" want to come... i doubt you'll find your love there, but it would be fun.
I'll be at the bar,
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 17:06
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Post 61
Feb 23, 2011 @ 17:11
At 7 Arts? Drinks on Charlie!
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Post 62
Feb 23, 2011 @ 17:14
At 7 Arts? Drinks on Charlie!
Feb 23, 11 17:11
Did someone mention "body shots"?
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Post 63
Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:17
Jan 1, 70 01:00
David:
I know and many great and useful papers have been written on this subject. Our task as men, put simply, seems to be to present ourselves as to be the best choice in the mating scenario. Now, I don't presume that's a surprise for anyone. How to remain the best choice is another matter.. I think changing over time and in sync with your partner is one of the keys to success (and John Cleese may be right, too).
Also, "chicks" = human females, as we are, after all, animals. I may be a pig, too. I even fly.
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David:
I know and many great and useful papers have been written on this subject. Our task as men, put simply, seems to be to present ourselves as to be the best choice in the mating scenario. Now, I don't presume that's a surprise for anyone. How to remain the best choice is another matter.. I think changing over time and in sync with your partner is one of the keys to success (and John Cleese may be right, too).
Also, "chicks" = human females, as we are, after all, animals. I may be a pig, too. I even fly.
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:17
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Post 64
Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:19
Jan 1, 70 01:00
It's practical when walking in a mine field
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Post 65
Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:39
It's practical when walking in a mine field
Feb 23, 11 18:19
i dont think 3 steps is safe enuff distance matey... unless you need to hear the "click"...
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i dont think 3 steps is safe enuff distance matey... unless you need to hear the "click"...
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:39
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Post 66
Feb 23, 2011 @ 18:42
i dont think 3 steps is safe enuff distance matey... unless you need to hear the "click"...
Feb 23, 11 18:39
Can't risk losing her out of sight either... one "faux pas" and bang!
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Post 67
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:03
i dont think 3 steps is safe enuff distance matey... unless you need to hear the "click"...
Feb 23, 11 18:39
.. so you click with the woman and everything blows up!
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Post 68
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:09
.. so you click with the woman and everything blows up!
Feb 23, 11 19:03
ideally
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 69
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:08
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Precisely. All forms of power. The trick is to acquire and keep at least one of those.. be it financial, artistic prowess, bedtime godliness, physical/intellectual strength, or something else to put you above the pack.
Indeed, fair exchange is fair.
And, yes.. that question is very interesting, given that I'm a male.
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Precisely. All forms of power. The trick is to acquire and keep at least one of those.. be it financial, artistic prowess, bedtime godliness, physical/intellectual strength, or something else to put you above the pack.
Indeed, fair exchange is fair.
And, yes.. that question is very interesting, given that I'm a male.
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:08
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Post 70
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:14
Charlie and FerneyL, the new Glocals comedy duo...
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Post 71
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:17
ideally
Feb 23, 11 19:09
.. then I'm doing things right :)
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Post 72
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:22
Jan 1, 70 01:00
You must be one of the 'bad guys' - you want them all to yourself ;) A commendable goal!
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You must be one of the 'bad guys' - you want them all to yourself ;) A commendable goal!
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:22
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Post 73
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:35
Jan 1, 70 01:00
depends on the quality of the .... ahh never mind..
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Post 74
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:33
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Aaaaaaaaaaaahahaha.....
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Post 75
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:30
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Yes I totally agree with you...
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Post 76
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:36
right im off to the pub... see all you chick there then...i dare you.
(7arts)
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right im off to the pub... see all you chick there then...i dare you.
(7arts)
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:36
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Post 77
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:43
Jan 1, 70 01:00
offer to "chicks"... if you want to join to mingle with the hoards of babes, be my guest ;-)
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offer to "chicks"... if you want to join to mingle with the hoards of babes, be my guest ;-)
Charlie, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:43
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Post 78
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:38
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Impossible!To say because they know that they are not having what they want!
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Impossible!To say because they know that they are not having what they want!
Daniela L, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:38
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Post 79
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:38
Jan 1, 70 01:00
David: Thank you for the proposition. The game is now 0-1 in your favour ;)
Unfortunately, I'm busy tonight, writing on glocals. The rooster needs to patrol the henhouse..
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David: Thank you for the proposition. The game is now 0-1 in your favour ;)
Unfortunately, I'm busy tonight, writing on glocals. The rooster needs to patrol the henhouse..
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:38
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Post 80
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:48
David: Thank you for the proposition. The game is now 0-1 in your favour ;)
Unfortunately, I'm busy tonight, writing on glocals. The rooster needs to patrol the henhouse..
Feb 23, 11 19:38
@ FerneyL & David ...
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 81
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:51
i dont want to be in your book
but here is a quote from Wednsday Adams from the family Adams value film
wednsday does not wish to marry
her friend then asks her
"What would you do if you met a man who would do everything for you , be your slave ?"
Wednsday replies:
pity him
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i dont want to be in your book
but here is a quote from Wednsday Adams from the family Adams value film
wednsday does not wish to marry
her friend then asks her
"What would you do if you met a man who would do everything for you , be your slave ?"
Wednsday replies:
pity him
star, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:51
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Post 82
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:53
my answer is
it is not difficult to find the right one
however it is very difficult to find the wrong one
speaking of which
my neighbors downstairs are fighting again
it is time to head out to the jazz club
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my answer is
it is not difficult to find the right one
however it is very difficult to find the wrong one
speaking of which
my neighbors downstairs are fighting again
it is time to head out to the jazz club
star, Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:53
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Post 83
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:56
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Oh really sorry David i'm into women 
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Post 84
Feb 23, 2011 @ 19:58
this song is what we are looking for...
Feb 21, 11 15:08
: ))
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 85
Feb 23, 2011 @ 20:05
I LIKE THIS THREAD !
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 86
Feb 23, 2011 @ 20:15
Jan 1, 70 01:00
That said, sharing of bedtime power may be available to successful applicants. Daily!
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That said, sharing of bedtime power may be available to successful applicants. Daily!
FerneyL, Feb 23, 2011 @ 20:15
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Post 87
Feb 23, 2011 @ 23:32
Jan 1, 70 01:00
needy? me?
non.
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Post 88
Feb 24, 2011 @ 02:19
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Post 89
Feb 24, 2011 @ 15:04
Jan 1, 70 01:00
I also have scientific evidence that you are much braver on the forum than in real life ;) Cheers.
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I also have scientific evidence that you are much braver on the forum than in real life ;) Cheers.
catalin, Feb 24, 2011 @ 15:04
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Post 90
Feb 24, 2011 @ 15:23
It's a nice idea and i can agree with you, my dear) At the same time we are more often braver in our thoughts about ourselves and in our expectations from others while we are not that brave in our own deeds toward others and thoughts about them)))
How is your day today?
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It's a nice idea and i can agree with you, my dear) At the same time we are more often braver in our thoughts about ourselves and in our expectations from others while we are not that brave in our own deeds toward others and thoughts about them)))
How is your day today?
Evgenia Kondrakhina, Feb 24, 2011 @ 15:23
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Post 91
Feb 24, 2011 @ 16:15
It's a nice idea and i can agree with you, my dear) At the same time we are more often braver in our thoughts about ourselves and in our expectations from others while we are not that brave in our own deeds toward others and thoughts about them)))
How is your day today?
Feb 24, 11 15:23
What a shock! Who would've guessed.
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Post 92
Feb 24, 2011 @ 16:25
nothing more is promised or expect,
exept ice cream and
kisses))
So many kisses at Dragobete Day,
from ice cream lover!
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nothing more is promised or expect,
exept ice cream and
kisses))
So many kisses at Dragobete Day,
from ice cream lover!
Evgenia Kondrakhina, Feb 24, 2011 @ 16:25
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Post 93
Feb 25, 2011 @ 13:17
it depends on my mood) and your?
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Post 94
Feb 25, 2011 @ 14:31
nothing more is promised or expect,
exept ice cream and
kisses))
So many kisses at Dragobete Day,
from ice cream lover!
Feb 24, 11 16:25
Crikey....
(Cat, buy lip balm matey )
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Post 95
Feb 26, 2011 @ 22:21
Interesting thread. Personnally I was happily married for 18 years (lost my wife 5 years ago from Cancer). So my perception might be a bit different from the divorced who potentially had a bad experience.
When I read all these posts, I see a lot of reasoning, analysis of the whys and hows... Trying to avoid making the same mistakes maybe.
Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it, just daring to try it and see how it goes?
Think a bit more with your heart io. your brain. Give it a try, it might work ;-)
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Interesting thread. Personnally I was happily married for 18 years (lost my wife 5 years ago from Cancer). So my perception might be a bit different from the divorced who potentially had a bad experience.
When I read all these posts, I see a lot of reasoning, analysis of the whys and hows... Trying to avoid making the same mistakes maybe.
Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it, just daring to try it and see how it goes?
Think a bit more with your heart io. your brain. Give it a try, it might work ;-)
didier r, Feb 26, 2011 @ 22:21
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Post 96
Feb 27, 2011 @ 00:11
Didier,
as the thread is about how difficult it is to find the right one, don't you think that it's fairly normal that there is a lot of anylsis and reasoning? We'd all be foolish not to ask ourseleves a few questions if it did not work for us.What if our heart does not "think" right? if it keeps on leading us into toxic relationships? We will need our brain to dismantle the mechanisms of my errances and analyse them.
Which leads to freedom, touched upon a few times in this thread. Are we really free to choose as some seem to pretend? I have my doubts; strong ones. We are the product of our genes, our education, our family, our culture, and last but not least, our personal history (and a bit of luck...). That determines the ground on which we can build some kind of freedom, but that does not necessarily mean that we are "free". We may conquer it, in particular by understading how we function (know thyself), but it can be hard work.
You shall be free indeed when your days are not without a care nor your nights without a want and a grief, but rather when these things girdle your life and yet you rise above them naked and unbound. And how shall you rise beyond your days and nights unless you break the chains which you at the dawn of your understanding have fastened around your noon hour?
In truth that which you call freedom is the strongest of these chains, though its links glitter in the sun and dazzle your eyes. (Khalil Gibran "On Freedom")
This being said, to let go to overcome our limitations sure helps but it's sadly not as easy said than done.
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Didier,
as the thread is about how difficult it is to find the right one, don't you think that it's fairly normal that there is a lot of anylsis and reasoning? We'd all be foolish not to ask ourseleves a few questions if it did not work for us.What if our heart does not "think" right? if it keeps on leading us into toxic relationships? We will need our brain to dismantle the mechanisms of my errances and analyse them.
Which leads to freedom, touched upon a few times in this thread. Are we really free to choose as some seem to pretend? I have my doubts; strong ones. We are the product of our genes, our education, our family, our culture, and last but not least, our personal history (and a bit of luck...). That determines the ground on which we can build some kind of freedom, but that does not necessarily mean that we are "free". We may conquer it, in particular by understading how we function (know thyself), but it can be hard work.
You shall be free indeed when your days are not without a care nor your nights without a want and a grief, but rather when these things girdle your life and yet you rise above them naked and unbound. And how shall you rise beyond your days and nights unless you break the chains which you at the dawn of your understanding have fastened around your noon hour?
In truth that which you call freedom is the strongest of these chains, though its links glitter in the sun and dazzle your eyes. (Khalil Gibran "On Freedom")
This being said, to let go to overcome our limitations sure helps but it's sadly not as easy said than done.
Free, Feb 27, 2011 @ 00:11
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Post 97
Feb 27, 2011 @ 09:29
Hi "Free" (sorry, you didn't give your first name),
I agree with what you say. Indeed when we have a bad experience, we try to avoid it reoccuring (that's normal human behaviour). A bit of thinking is not bad - nothing is black or white, there are lots of gray shades.
I see the problem arising when the reasoning takes control and forbids oneself to try a new adventure simply because one believe that maybe all the perfect conditions are not present.
In the last 5 years, I also had a few stories that didn't last. But I can tell you, some of them were really worth the experience. Even if we realized after some time that it would not work on the long term, we both enjoyed the journey and stayed friends, because we were always true to ourselves. I find that often, stories end badly because people tried to be who they are not. When you're true to yourself and others, no one can complain you cheated on them.
After all, isn't life simply about the journey itself without caring too much for the end station (which is the same for everyone, no surprise there...). If I would have known or guessed that my wife would die so early, I would probably have hesitated to marry her... and I would have missed 18 wonderful years and a beautiful daughter.
Very smart is the one who can tell upfront how a relationship will evolve. The only way to know it, is to try it. That was the only meaning of my post.
Didier
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Hi "Free" (sorry, you didn't give your first name),
I agree with what you say. Indeed when we have a bad experience, we try to avoid it reoccuring (that's normal human behaviour). A bit of thinking is not bad - nothing is black or white, there are lots of gray shades.
I see the problem arising when the reasoning takes control and forbids oneself to try a new adventure simply because one believe that maybe all the perfect conditions are not present.
In the last 5 years, I also had a few stories that didn't last. But I can tell you, some of them were really worth the experience. Even if we realized after some time that it would not work on the long term, we both enjoyed the journey and stayed friends, because we were always true to ourselves. I find that often, stories end badly because people tried to be who they are not. When you're true to yourself and others, no one can complain you cheated on them.
After all, isn't life simply about the journey itself without caring too much for the end station (which is the same for everyone, no surprise there...). If I would have known or guessed that my wife would die so early, I would probably have hesitated to marry her... and I would have missed 18 wonderful years and a beautiful daughter.
Very smart is the one who can tell upfront how a relationship will evolve. The only way to know it, is to try it. That was the only meaning of my post.
Didier
didier r, Feb 27, 2011 @ 09:29
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Post 98
Feb 27, 2011 @ 10:18
[QUOTE]I see the problem arising when the reasoning takes control and forbids oneself to try a new adventure simply because one believe that maybe all the perfect conditions are not prentes.[UNQUOTE]
Then it's a question of beliefs rather than reasonning. Much more complicated! But you're right, nobody can tell upfront how a relationship will evolve. But if we are really honnest with ourselves and our partner, we can more or less tell wether it will lead somewhere or not.
The text you are quoting:
[QUOTE]I see the problem arising when the reasoning takes control and forbids oneself to try a new adventure simply because one believe that maybe all the perfect conditions are not prentes.[UNQUOTE]
Then it's a question of beliefs rather than reasonning. Much more complicated! But you're right, nobody can tell upfront how a relationship will evolve. But if we are really honnest with ourselves and our partner, we can more or less tell wether it will lead somewhere or not.
Free, Feb 27, 2011 @ 10:18
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Post 99
Feb 27, 2011 @ 10:56
a 15 year old country music song offers the advice I was given by my mom =)
and that the right person comes along when you are ready for them.. if it wern't for going through all the bad ones, you'd never know the difference!
Feb 21, 11 00:36
I wish it is true! :-)
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Post 100
Feb 27, 2011 @ 12:20
hmm interesting replies there. finding the right one...well how do you know? when you thought the right one turned out not to be the right one? i would say you begin to mistrust your judgement with the right one.
then for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else. but have i met the right one i may have done but when you are both commitment phobes making that leap doesnt happen. nor does living in different countries.
i do feel that there is much pressure to be with someone...dating sites and the like, and just being friends is overlooked. hence here not being a dating site woohoo no pressure to be something i am not but if i find the mr right here or anywhere else and doesnt expect me to change the fab.
The text you are quoting:
hmm interesting replies there. finding the right one...well how do you know? when you thought the right one turned out not to be the right one? i would say you begin to mistrust your judgement with the right one.
then for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else. but have i met the right one i may have done but when you are both commitment phobes making that leap doesnt happen. nor does living in different countries.
i do feel that there is much pressure to be with someone...dating sites and the like, and just being friends is overlooked. hence here not being a dating site woohoo no pressure to be something i am not but if i find the mr right here or anywhere else and doesnt expect me to change the fab.
Helen F, Feb 27, 2011 @ 12:20
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Post 101
Feb 27, 2011 @ 12:47
I think what we are all forgetting to notice is that there are different perceptions of the "right one" for different people due to our differences in tastes, preceptions, requirements etc.
We forget that we are all looking for "someone" who complements us, so what is deemed as right to one person might be deemed as wrong to another. And all this boils down to (imho) the fact that we all cannot go for the same kind of "right one" as this is humanly impossible and would make the world a damn boring place to be in if everyone one thought the same and acted the same way.
The text you are quoting:
I think what we are all forgetting to notice is that there are different perceptions of the "right one" for different people due to our differences in tastes, preceptions, requirements etc.
We forget that we are all looking for "someone" who complements us, so what is deemed as right to one person might be deemed as wrong to another. And all this boils down to (imho) the fact that we all cannot go for the same kind of "right one" as this is humanly impossible and would make the world a damn boring place to be in if everyone one thought the same and acted the same way.
Helen D, Feb 27, 2011 @ 12:47
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Post 102
Feb 27, 2011 @ 13:16
[QUOTE]I see the problem arising when the reasoning takes control and forbids oneself to try a new adventure simply because one believe that maybe all the perfect conditions are not prentes.[UNQUOTE]
Then it's a question of beliefs rather than reasonning. Much more complicated! But you're right, nobody can tell upfront how a relationship will evolve. But if we are really honnest with ourselves and our partner, we can more or less tell wether it will lead somewhere or not.
Feb 27, 11 10:18
Hello François (seems we scout the same expat networks ),
Without starting a philosophical debate, I wonder how one's reasoning cannot be influenced by one's beliefs.
Now on the fact, one can "more or less" tell whether it will lead somewhere, this is again "reasoning the relationship's potential" instead of just "feeling it with your heart".
I can only share my experience, which might be different for others. But each time I engaged in a "reasoned relationship", it didn't lead to something exceptional.
On the contrary, when I literally fell in love with a woman for whom all reasoning was telling me to run away, we spent a fantastic 2 years and half of passionate romance. Even if in the end, there were indeed too many things for us to build on the long run, we're still excellent friends and enjoy having a good dinner together whenever I happen to be in Paris.
"Most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are what the world regards as one's mistakes." - Oscar Wilde.
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Hello François (seems we scout the same expat networks ),
Without starting a philosophical debate, I wonder how one's reasoning cannot be influenced by one's beliefs.
Now on the fact, one can "more or less" tell whether it will lead somewhere, this is again "reasoning the relationship's potential" instead of just "feeling it with your heart".
I can only share my experience, which might be different for others. But each time I engaged in a "reasoned relationship", it didn't lead to something exceptional.
On the contrary, when I literally fell in love with a woman for whom all reasoning was telling me to run away, we spent a fantastic 2 years and half of passionate romance. Even if in the end, there were indeed too many things for us to build on the long run, we're still excellent friends and enjoy having a good dinner together whenever I happen to be in Paris.
"Most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are what the world regards as one's mistakes." - Oscar Wilde.
didier r, Feb 27, 2011 @ 13:16
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Post 103
Feb 27, 2011 @ 13:58
Jan 1, 70 01:00
merci, c'est tres gentil)))
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Post 104
Feb 27, 2011 @ 14:45
Jan 1, 70 01:00
"relationship is something "to do"
to DO and may be even THINK about but TOGETHER.
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"relationship is something "to do"
to DO and may be even THINK about but TOGETHER.
Evgenia Kondrakhina, Feb 27, 2011 @ 14:45
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Post 105
Feb 27, 2011 @ 15:09
Jan 1, 70 01:00
))))
Ahaaa i shall think less and slowlier then)))
Merci, David!!!!!
P.S. i stop chatting and go to DO)))
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))))
Ahaaa i shall think less and slowlier then)))
Merci, David!!!!!
P.S. i stop chatting and go to DO)))
Evgenia Kondrakhina, Feb 27, 2011 @ 15:09
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 106
Feb 27, 2011 @ 17:18
I am with Didier on this one. There is a lot said, written and thought about all this. "How to attract the man of your dreams", "The Game", "Why men love bitches", "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus", and attention: "Men are like waffles, women are like spaggetti". (That last one kinda cool title, which reminds me I need to eat something.)
I say just roll with it. Jump into it. Don't discuss it and overanalyze it because it's a shot in the foot. Didier, I think your comment says a lot about the pop consumerism culture, as well. In other words, instead of living life, we watch other people living it on TV.
We watch 'Friends' sitting on the couch in that cafe and chatting, instead of going out to a cafe with our own friends and chatting. We call that entertainment.
We watch Sex and the City girls talk about sex and dating, and for many women that is as sexy as the day gets. And as if anything in it has any resemblance to life?
We watch movies, read pop-culture books about love and relationships, then we discuss and analyze them. What we forget in the meantime is to actually go out and have a relationship or meet new people, if we are single.
Instead we follow stupid advice, while the authors are getting rich, experiment socially and play it cool. So what happens when we get in one place a stand-off-ish guy a la The Game and an aloof girl a la Why men love bitches? Recepie for disaster! It will be over before you've even started because both sides have decided to play cool, decipher the other's behavior, get into their head, and kinda try to manipulate them - just a little bit. Cuz that's what these books say is the successful behavior. And by the way, love is officially out of the window from the get-go.
In a postmodern society where we doubt everything, everything is relative and there are no simple truths, I feel there is so too much meta-love - talking about perhaps considerating doing - and not enough love.
The answer won't be in the books or the movies or the news articles. (Attention: And that's coming from an author.)
The text you are quoting:
I am with Didier on this one. There is a lot said, written and thought about all this. "How to attract the man of your dreams", "The Game", "Why men love bitches", "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus", and attention: "Men are like waffles, women are like spaggetti". (That last one kinda cool title, which reminds me I need to eat something.)
I say just roll with it. Jump into it. Don't discuss it and overanalyze it because it's a shot in the foot. Didier, I think your comment says a lot about the pop consumerism culture, as well. In other words, instead of living life, we watch other people living it on TV.
We watch 'Friends' sitting on the couch in that cafe and chatting, instead of going out to a cafe with our own friends and chatting. We call that entertainment.
We watch Sex and the City girls talk about sex and dating, and for many women that is as sexy as the day gets. And as if anything in it has any resemblance to life?
We watch movies, read pop-culture books about love and relationships, then we discuss and analyze them. What we forget in the meantime is to actually go out and have a relationship or meet new people, if we are single.
Instead we follow stupid advice, while the authors are getting rich, experiment socially and play it cool. So what happens when we get in one place a stand-off-ish guy a la The Game and an aloof girl a la Why men love bitches? Recepie for disaster! It will be over before you've even started because both sides have decided to play cool, decipher the other's behavior, get into their head, and kinda try to manipulate them - just a little bit. Cuz that's what these books say is the successful behavior. And by the way, love is officially out of the window from the get-go.
In a postmodern society where we doubt everything, everything is relative and there are no simple truths, I feel there is so too much meta-love - talking about perhaps considerating doing - and not enough love.
The answer won't be in the books or the movies or the news articles. (Attention: And that's coming from an author.)
Ivet, Feb 27, 2011 @ 17:18
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 107
Feb 27, 2011 @ 18:29
David, the processes you are decribing as 'coming closer to our dreams' are anything but dreamy to me. Kinda scary actually because they take the human out of the human. I was mostly talking about movies and books, but if we take it further into digital and online experiences, it becomes even less real for me. I would rather stick to real - in the most simple sense of the word. (I am talking about love here, not all other interactions.)
I understand your point that according to some, those type of new relationships may be as 'real' as real relationships. And this is exactly what I mean when I say that relativism and stretching reality is perhaps going too far in those definitions. What do we know that we know? What is real considering that what we know is not what we know? etc. etc.
In the end human interactions are about warmth. I'd rather have a person smile at me than get a 'poke' or a 'twinkle'. After all is said and done, these relationships aren't real.
The text you are quoting:
David, the processes you are decribing as 'coming closer to our dreams' are anything but dreamy to me. Kinda scary actually because they take the human out of the human. I was mostly talking about movies and books, but if we take it further into digital and online experiences, it becomes even less real for me. I would rather stick to real - in the most simple sense of the word. (I am talking about love here, not all other interactions.)
I understand your point that according to some, those type of new relationships may be as 'real' as real relationships. And this is exactly what I mean when I say that relativism and stretching reality is perhaps going too far in those definitions. What do we know that we know? What is real considering that what we know is not what we know? etc. etc.
In the end human interactions are about warmth. I'd rather have a person smile at me than get a 'poke' or a 'twinkle'. After all is said and done, these relationships aren't real.
Ivet, Feb 27, 2011 @ 18:29
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 108
Feb 27, 2011 @ 18:44
David: on the point of pop-culture books actually working in creating attraction. They actually don't work. They might in some circumstances and on some less insightful 'subjects'.
Following those advices is the silliest thing a guy can do and if she likes you - buddy, it's despite those silly things you do following the book, not because of them!!! The point again being that while monitoring, analyzing and executing you are missing the real interaction.
What is more, you may be jeapordizing your chances because she spots exactly what kind of tricks you're trying to pull off. While, otherwise, you would have had a chance.
The text you are quoting:
David: on the point of pop-culture books actually working in creating attraction. They actually don't work. They might in some circumstances and on some less insightful 'subjects'.
Following those advices is the silliest thing a guy can do and if she likes you - buddy, it's despite those silly things you do following the book, not because of them!!! The point again being that while monitoring, analyzing and executing you are missing the real interaction.
What is more, you may be jeapordizing your chances because she spots exactly what kind of tricks you're trying to pull off. While, otherwise, you would have had a chance.
Ivet, Feb 27, 2011 @ 18:44
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 109
Feb 27, 2011 @ 19:24
I have two issues with this approach.
1. It assumes that all there is to success with the opposite sex is the way you act. Although there might be an overlap, how you act does not equal who you are. So to assume that some advice found on paper can change who you are and your desireability, and make you all of a sudden attractive is misleading. If the book teaches you to mimic the characteristics of an alpha male (which is one argument) you mimicing this does not make you an alpha male. If the book teaches you what to say to challenge the woman, that doesn't mean you necessarily have what it takes to back it up in a conversation. That's why I think it's better to go with what you are. Because those techniques are the death kiss of attraction. In the end, this is the fundamental question: why would you need help and have to use techniques to begin with, if you're genuinely desireable?
2. Second, that approach equates advice for love or dating, with advice for job interviews, being successful at work, making a good impression in school, how to maintain a good garden, how to cook, etc. It tries to give you the bullet point list for something inherently different from all other self-help fields. Although some may associate success in different spheres of life (awesome job, hot girlfriend, fast car), these spheres are inherently different. You can't reduce human relations to some book of the type "How to be successful at a job interview for dummies". You can say the right things and get the job. And that's okay. But you won't be building love and affection, if you say the 'right' things to 'get' the woman.
The text you are quoting:
I have two issues with this approach.
1. It assumes that all there is to success with the opposite sex is the way you act. Although there might be an overlap, how you act does not equal who you are. So to assume that some advice found on paper can change who you are and your desireability, and make you all of a sudden attractive is misleading. If the book teaches you to mimic the characteristics of an alpha male (which is one argument) you mimicing this does not make you an alpha male. If the book teaches you what to say to challenge the woman, that doesn't mean you necessarily have what it takes to back it up in a conversation. That's why I think it's better to go with what you are. Because those techniques are the death kiss of attraction. In the end, this is the fundamental question: why would you need help and have to use techniques to begin with, if you're genuinely desireable?
2. Second, that approach equates advice for love or dating, with advice for job interviews, being successful at work, making a good impression in school, how to maintain a good garden, how to cook, etc. It tries to give you the bullet point list for something inherently different from all other self-help fields. Although some may associate success in different spheres of life (awesome job, hot girlfriend, fast car), these spheres are inherently different. You can't reduce human relations to some book of the type "How to be successful at a job interview for dummies". You can say the right things and get the job. And that's okay. But you won't be building love and affection, if you say the 'right' things to 'get' the woman.
Ivet, Feb 27, 2011 @ 19:24
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 110
Feb 27, 2011 @ 20:24
I have two issues with this approach.
1. It assumes that all there is to success with the opposite sex is the way you act. Although there might be an overlap, how you act does not equal who you are. So to assume that some advice found on paper can change who you are and your desireability, and make you all of a sudden attractive is misleading. If the book teaches you to mimic the characteristics of an alpha male (which is one argument) you mimicing this does not make you an alpha male. If the book teaches you what to say to challenge the woman, that doesn't mean you necessarily have what it takes to back it up in a conversation. That's why I think it's better to go with what you are. Because those techniques are the death kiss of attraction. In the end, this is the fundamental question: why would you need help and have to use techniques to begin with, if you're genuinely desireable?
2. Second, that approach equates advice for love or dating, with advice for job interviews, being successful at work, making a good impression in school, how to maintain a good garden, how to cook, etc. It tries to give you the bullet point list for something inherently different from all other self-help fields. Although some may associate success in different spheres of life (awesome job, hot girlfriend, fast car), these spheres are inherently different. You can't reduce human relations to some book of the type "How to be successful at a job interview for dummies". You can say the right things and get the job. And that's okay. But you won't be building love and affection, if you say the 'right' things to 'get' the woman.
Feb 27, 11 19:24
Very well said.
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 111
Feb 27, 2011 @ 21:15
Isabella:
1.Yes absolutely. There must be trust that the other person would see the real you. Although risky, it's the only way.
2. If you fake it you ain't gon make it because 'making it' is already excluded by definition by the faking.
David
I really though that behavioralism and simple response to external stimuli was a thing of the last century. Never have been a behavioralist, don't think will become one. I think it's better for it to stay where it is - with animal conditioning.
The text you are quoting:
Isabella:
1.Yes absolutely. There must be trust that the other person would see the real you. Although risky, it's the only way.
2. If you fake it you ain't gon make it because 'making it' is already excluded by definition by the faking.
David
I really though that behavioralism and simple response to external stimuli was a thing of the last century. Never have been a behavioralist, don't think will become one. I think it's better for it to stay where it is - with animal conditioning.
Ivet, Feb 27, 2011 @ 21:15
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 112
Feb 27, 2011 @ 21:28
The text you are quoting:
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 113
Feb 27, 2011 @ 22:28
@Helen F (Post 150) : then for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else. I do not mean to be rude, but Is it difficlut to share you space with someone because you've been single for long, or are you single because you cannot? I'm with Isabella here (post 152): being being with someone who is an ace fit makes my space, my life, and ultimately me better. And BTW, Isabella, Glocals is not a dating site bur a ssocializing site and it seems that there are quite a few people who have never been able to dram a line between the two, including me
@Didier (post 153) about beliefs. It works both ways: our beliefs are influenced by our reasoning as our reasoning is influenced by our beliefs. That's why we need a third party to confront ourselves (therapist, friend, book, forum, whatever) and that's also why our reasonning's got to be sharp... This being said, I agree with you, we'd better follow our heart when it comes to feelings and every time I ended up in a dead end with a woman it's because I left my brain take over and did not listen to my intuition.
@David (Post 157): are we not trying to deal with our own anxieties? Of course we are, we are afraid of not being up to the expectation of our partner,we are afraid that s/he discovers our weaknesses, our imperfection, our pettiness... We even can be so afraid of failure that we wouldn't even embark on the journey.
Imagination on its own has no power. A relationship is something "to do". I disagree here. Imagination has full power, to drag you towards failure or succes. A relationship is something to do, by all means, but it's also something to imagine, and depending on how you see it, its chances of success may dramatically increase (or decrease). That reminds me of a description of friendship i read once: A friend is someone you know and nevethess love and so much more true for love.
@David (Post 163): We are our beliefs. We are certainly our beliefs, but even more our deeds
@Ivet (Post 174) If the book teaches you what to say to challenge the woman, that doesn't mean you necessarily have what it takes to back it up in a conversation. Right. On the other hand, it may help non alpha males to get to the point where conversation becomes an option thereby giving the female a chance to discover who they are. We re more than that biological determinism that seem to underline our first contacts, at least in pickup games; we are also culture, feelings, education. knowledge, etc. and it takes more time to discover that side of a person than the easily displayed awesome job, the hot partner and the fast car. These book are just recipes and we all know that good recipes do not necessarily make good cooks...
@David (Post 177) We have become objects. Objects exist only for others; only subjects can exist independently of the regard of 'the other'. And as long as we will depend on the gaze of others, well remain objects. But isn't it what our culture is suggesting we should do by promoting standardized images of success at all levels, of which the books metionned above are a good example? "Subjectization" ouf ourselves is the key
The text you are quoting:
@Helen F (Post 150) : then for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else. I do not mean to be rude, but Is it difficlut to share you space with someone because you've been single for long, or are you single because you cannot? I'm with Isabella here (post 152): being being with someone who is an ace fit makes my space, my life, and ultimately me better. And BTW, Isabella, Glocals is not a dating site bur a ssocializing site and it seems that there are quite a few people who have never been able to dram a line between the two, including me
@Didier (post 153) about beliefs. It works both ways: our beliefs are influenced by our reasoning as our reasoning is influenced by our beliefs. That's why we need a third party to confront ourselves (therapist, friend, book, forum, whatever) and that's also why our reasonning's got to be sharp... This being said, I agree with you, we'd better follow our heart when it comes to feelings and every time I ended up in a dead end with a woman it's because I left my brain take over and did not listen to my intuition.
@David (Post 157): are we not trying to deal with our own anxieties? Of course we are, we are afraid of not being up to the expectation of our partner,we are afraid that s/he discovers our weaknesses, our imperfection, our pettiness... We even can be so afraid of failure that we wouldn't even embark on the journey.
Imagination on its own has no power. A relationship is something "to do". I disagree here. Imagination has full power, to drag you towards failure or succes. A relationship is something to do, by all means, but it's also something to imagine, and depending on how you see it, its chances of success may dramatically increase (or decrease). That reminds me of a description of friendship i read once: A friend is someone you know and nevethess love and so much more true for love.
@David (Post 163): We are our beliefs. We are certainly our beliefs, but even more our deeds
@Ivet (Post 174) If the book teaches you what to say to challenge the woman, that doesn't mean you necessarily have what it takes to back it up in a conversation. Right. On the other hand, it may help non alpha males to get to the point where conversation becomes an option thereby giving the female a chance to discover who they are. We re more than that biological determinism that seem to underline our first contacts, at least in pickup games; we are also culture, feelings, education. knowledge, etc. and it takes more time to discover that side of a person than the easily displayed awesome job, the hot partner and the fast car. These book are just recipes and we all know that good recipes do not necessarily make good cooks...
@David (Post 177) We have become objects. Objects exist only for others; only subjects can exist independently of the regard of 'the other'. And as long as we will depend on the gaze of others, well remain objects. But isn't it what our culture is suggesting we should do by promoting standardized images of success at all levels, of which the books metionned above are a good example? "Subjectization" ouf ourselves is the key
Free, Feb 27, 2011 @ 22:28
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 114
Feb 28, 2011 @ 03:18
Ivet: In the end, this is the fundamental question: why would you need help and have to use techniques to begin with, if you're genuinely desireable?
There is a lot of misleading information about female attraction floating around in popular culture. I've known many men who were smart, handsome, talkative, active, interesting, successful, confident, humorous, etc. -- in short, they are a "good catch" on paper but they all had trouble building and maintaining attraction with women. Why is that? Could it be that they are engaging in behaviors that turn women off? Poor body language? Mannerisms? Too much follow-up communication? Too much pedestalizing and supplication? Trying to show interest but inadvertently pushing her "creeper" buttons instead?
I understand what you are saying but I do feel that men can alter their behavioural patterns and improve their success. At very least, they can learn what they are doing wrong and work to stop doing it. I have personal experience here.
Here is an example of changing one's behaviors (I've posted this here before).
The text you are quoting:
Ivet: In the end, this is the fundamental question: why would you need help and have to use techniques to begin with, if you're genuinely desireable?
There is a lot of misleading information about female attraction floating around in popular culture. I've known many men who were smart, handsome, talkative, active, interesting, successful, confident, humorous, etc. -- in short, they are a "good catch" on paper but they all had trouble building and maintaining attraction with women. Why is that? Could it be that they are engaging in behaviors that turn women off? Poor body language? Mannerisms? Too much follow-up communication? Too much pedestalizing and supplication? Trying to show interest but inadvertently pushing her "creeper" buttons instead?
I understand what you are saying but I do feel that men can alter their behavioural patterns and improve their success. At very least, they can learn what they are doing wrong and work to stop doing it. I have personal experience here.
Here is an example of changing one's behaviors (I've posted this here before).
richardm, Feb 28, 2011 @ 03:18
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 115
Feb 28, 2011 @ 10:24
for some yes could be ones...but for me it was one and that one turned out to be with me for all the wrong reasons.
its my preference as much as many may disagree not to go down that route again unless it feel 100% right.
The text you are quoting:
for some yes could be ones...but for me it was one and that one turned out to be with me for all the wrong reasons.
its my preference as much as many may disagree not to go down that route again unless it feel 100% right.
Helen F, Feb 28, 2011 @ 10:24
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 116
Feb 28, 2011 @ 13:07
'Make a man love me'....I am afraid if he doesnt like me for who I am then I definately do not intend to 'make' him love me.
The text you are quoting:
'Make a man love me'....I am afraid if he doesnt like me for who I am then I definately do not intend to 'make' him love me.
Helen F, Feb 28, 2011 @ 13:07
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 117
Feb 28, 2011 @ 13:31
About tips: It depends if the rule of the game is a balanced relationship or gaining power over an opponent! Kezia or DeAngelo are into power games, not romance or intimacy. A relationsip is opneness, not control, and I woud never, ever, date a woman like that Alexandra Fox. Delay having sex from three to preferably six months. What for??? What a silly idea...
Helen F your preference not to go down that route again unless it feel 100% right is respectable, but protecting yourself from being hurt again also protects you from being loved. You can either wait for a guy who is 100% right, or work on yourself and build up the inner strength to cope with relationship that are less than perfect, but can be improved over time through dialogue, commitment, faith, you name it.
The text you are quoting:
About tips: It depends if the rule of the game is a balanced relationship or gaining power over an opponent! Kezia or DeAngelo are into power games, not romance or intimacy. A relationsip is opneness, not control, and I woud never, ever, date a woman like that Alexandra Fox. Delay having sex from three to preferably six months. What for??? What a silly idea...
Helen F your preference not to go down that route again unless it feel 100% right is respectable, but protecting yourself from being hurt again also protects you from being loved. You can either wait for a guy who is 100% right, or work on yourself and build up the inner strength to cope with relationship that are less than perfect, but can be improved over time through dialogue, commitment, faith, you name it.
Free, Feb 28, 2011 @ 13:31
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 118
Feb 28, 2011 @ 14:12
Jan 1, 70 01:00
why not?
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 119
Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:07
About tips: It depends if the rule of the game is a balanced relationship or gaining power over an opponent! Kezia or DeAngelo are into power games, not romance or intimacy. A relationsip is opneness, not control, and I woud never, ever, date a woman like that Alexandra Fox. Delay having sex from three to preferably six months. What for??? What a silly idea...
Helen F your preference not to go down that route again unless it feel 100% right is respectable, but protecting yourself from being hurt again also protects you from being loved. You can either wait for a guy who is 100% right, or work on yourself and build up the inner strength to cope with relationship that are less than perfect, but can be improved over time through dialogue, commitment, faith, you name it.
Feb 28, 11 13:31
hmm have to say rather not took me a long time to get to where I am now and no my relationship was not perfect not looking for perfection but when it takes a person to say after 16 years of knowing you and 12 years of marriage they never loved you...you kind of think sod that why should I go through all that again.
Rebuilding ones life does not happen overnight but having it completely shattered does.
The text you are quoting:
hmm have to say rather not took me a long time to get to where I am now and no my relationship was not perfect not looking for perfection but when it takes a person to say after 16 years of knowing you and 12 years of marriage they never loved you...you kind of think sod that why should I go through all that again.
Rebuilding ones life does not happen overnight but having it completely shattered does.
Helen F, Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:07
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 120
Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:16
This is the truth:
Spin Doctors - Two Princes. Rock on guys!
One two princes kneel before you
That's what I said now
Princes, princes who adore you
Just go ahead now
The text you are quoting:
This is the truth:
Spin Doctors - Two Princes. Rock on guys!
One two princes kneel before you
That's what I said now
Princes, princes who adore you
Just go ahead now
Ivet, Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:16
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 121
Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:37
David, TRYING to impress may be a mistake, but what if the guy really is impressive, handsome, smart, sufccessful, strong, secure, caring, etc. Speaking for myself, of course
The text you are quoting:
David, TRYING to impress may be a mistake, but what if the guy really is impressive, handsome, smart, sufccessful, strong, secure, caring, etc. Speaking for myself, of course
Free, Feb 28, 2011 @ 15:37
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 122
Feb 28, 2011 @ 22:35
only away 1 day and soooo many posts. Seems a lot of reasoning going on still - Can't keep up with you guys, I have a life to live . But I wish you all to find the right one (however difficult it is) and more important, to keep him or her.
Did
The text you are quoting:
only away 1 day and soooo many posts. Seems a lot of reasoning going on still - Can't keep up with you guys, I have a life to live . But I wish you all to find the right one (however difficult it is) and more important, to keep him or her.
Did
didier r, Feb 28, 2011 @ 22:35
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 123
Mar 1, 2011 @ 13:31
finding a right person is not something you buy in perfect package. no person is perfect, hard to say you would every find perfectly matched person, life is a name of compromises, for me finding a person (not just a right one) becomes like a dreaming to walk on the moon. i'm 24 and at this age most of they guys have either have a love or on the way to have. and i see my self on the edge of the shore where i see my self on where,
The text you are quoting:
finding a right person is not something you buy in perfect package. no person is perfect, hard to say you would every find perfectly matched person, life is a name of compromises, for me finding a person (not just a right one) becomes like a dreaming to walk on the moon. i'm 24 and at this age most of they guys have either have a love or on the way to have. and i see my self on the edge of the shore where i see my self on where,
waqas s, Mar 1, 2011 @ 13:31
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 124
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:01
Jan 1, 70 01:00
NICE!!!!:)))
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 125
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:02
i dont want to be in your book
but here is a quote from Wednsday Adams from the family Adams value film
wednsday does not wish to marry
her friend then asks her
"What would you do if you met a man who would do everything for you , be your slave ?"
Wednsday replies:
pity him
Feb 23, 11 19:51
Do not worry when I choose some answer I'll ask to the people if they want to stay in my book:)Like a souvenir of some though about relationship and true love!
The text you are quoting:
Do not worry when I choose some answer I'll ask to the people if they want to stay in my book:)Like a souvenir of some though about relationship and true love!
Daniela L, Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:02
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 126
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:07
finding a right person is not something you buy in perfect package. no person is perfect, hard to say you would every find perfectly matched person, life is a name of compromises, for me finding a person (not just a right one) becomes like a dreaming to walk on the moon. i'm 24 and at this age most of they guys have either have a love or on the way to have. and i see my self on the edge of the shore where i see my self on where,
Mar 1, 11 13:31
life is a name of compromises...:)
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 127
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:09
only away 1 day and soooo many posts. Seems a lot of reasoning going on still - Can't keep up with you guys, I have a life to live . But I wish you all to find the right one (however difficult it is) and more important, to keep him or her.
Did
Feb 28, 11 22:35
No I'll take the time to see what people think!!:)
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 128
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:11
Jan 1, 70 01:00
?what are you talking about?
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 129
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:15
never tried to search,just when it comes,it comes
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Post 130
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:13
Jan 1, 70 01:00
I was just asking for opinion I don't think in a dating site!!discussing about argument anhaving fun in parties is ok bu I don't think at all that you can meet someone on the internet...!!!
The text you are quoting:
I was just asking for opinion I don't think in a dating site!!discussing about argument anhaving fun in parties is ok bu I don't think at all that you can meet someone on the internet...!!!
Daniela L, Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:13
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 131
Mar 1, 2011 @ 16:19
never tried to search,just when it comes,it comes
Mar 1, 11 16:15
so true!!
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 132
Mar 1, 2011 @ 17:04
Pick up artist video post 201 is so funny. "I am looking at your tits."
Uuuuu - what a guy! Am I supposed to feel overwhelmed with that guy's confidence and testosterone? Jeez, what an aplha male - he really doesn't care about what I think and he will stare at tits as much as he wants! What an impressive guy!
The funny bit though is how we didn't get to hear what happened next.
Let me share a personal story, make the situation so much better and give you something to laugh about. I knew a guy like that. I had a party at my place and he did the exact same thing saying: yes, he was staring, there is nothing wrong with that and that can look at anything he wants.
His wife was sitting next to him. I told him: not in my house and they had to leave.
The text you are quoting:
Pick up artist video post 201 is so funny. "I am looking at your tits."
Uuuuu - what a guy! Am I supposed to feel overwhelmed with that guy's confidence and testosterone? Jeez, what an aplha male - he really doesn't care about what I think and he will stare at tits as much as he wants! What an impressive guy!
The funny bit though is how we didn't get to hear what happened next.
Let me share a personal story, make the situation so much better and give you something to laugh about. I knew a guy like that. I had a party at my place and he did the exact same thing saying: yes, he was staring, there is nothing wrong with that and that can look at anything he wants.
His wife was sitting next to him. I told him: not in my house and they had to leave.
Ivet, Mar 1, 2011 @ 17:04
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Post 133
Mar 1, 2011 @ 20:48
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Chocolate, I can understand, but why would roses be offensive?
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Post 134
Mar 1, 2011 @ 21:06
Jan 1, 70 01:00
A blatant ploy to get a girl into bed... Ha ha... So what? Flowers, and red roses in particular, are just part of the seduction game women and men willingly play toghether and I do not see where's the problem. Sex is part of that game between consenting adults, and if they both happily enjoy it, so much the better. You are not naive enough to believe that a man could trick a woman into his bed without her consent? Or vice versa, it works both ways
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A blatant ploy to get a girl into bed... Ha ha... So what? Flowers, and red roses in particular, are just part of the seduction game women and men willingly play toghether and I do not see where's the problem. Sex is part of that game between consenting adults, and if they both happily enjoy it, so much the better. You are not naive enough to believe that a man could trick a woman into his bed without her consent? Or vice versa, it works both ways
Free, Mar 1, 2011 @ 21:06
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Post 135
Mar 1, 2011 @ 22:26
Roses are an obvious cunt reference (i.e. "flower"). It's such a blatant ploy to get a girl into bed.
The perfect cunter-strike would be for her to give him orchids...
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Roses are an obvious cunt reference (i.e. "flower"). It's such a blatant ploy to get a girl into bed.
The perfect cunter-strike would be for her to give him orchids...
Casuistik, Mar 1, 2011 @ 22:26
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Post 136
Mar 1, 2011 @ 23:26
Lawson: in all seriousness, I can never get myself to go to the store. I'd love to go - but I'm just too lazy. It'd be soo cool to have a guy drag me there
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Lawson: in all seriousness, I can never get myself to go to the store. I'd love to go - but I'm just too lazy. It'd be soo cool to have a guy drag me there
Ivet, Mar 1, 2011 @ 23:26
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 137
Mar 2, 2011 @ 05:01
Isnt this is the toughest topic ever dealt with in the history of human kind? I'm afraid there is no " write" or "wrong" answer. Is there anything or anyone as the "right" one?I am no expert, but I guess you will have to wait to find someone best suited to you. It is not easy,it is like shopping for shoes, but till you find the "best fit" you will just have to go on trying the other pair of shoes. hahaha!I am not trivialising the matter, but when you stop looking or searching, then the chances of finding something are higher. When it will happen, it will happen, keep smiling till then :)
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Isnt this is the toughest topic ever dealt with in the history of human kind? I'm afraid there is no " write" or "wrong" answer. Is there anything or anyone as the "right" one?I am no expert, but I guess you will have to wait to find someone best suited to you. It is not easy,it is like shopping for shoes, but till you find the "best fit" you will just have to go on trying the other pair of shoes. hahaha!I am not trivialising the matter, but when you stop looking or searching, then the chances of finding something are higher. When it will happen, it will happen, keep smiling till then :)
GHOSH, Mar 2, 2011 @ 05:01
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Post 138
Mar 2, 2011 @ 23:25
2 people fall in love when they have found the best object available on the market given the limitations of their own exchange value.....Frohm
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2 people fall in love when they have found the best object available on the market given the limitations of their own exchange value.....Frohm
Anna Naz, Mar 2, 2011 @ 23:25
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Post 139
Mar 4, 2011 @ 23:36
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 140
Mar 5, 2011 @ 00:55
David,
I have nothing against mariage either, I quoted the first article (Post 9) because I found some truth in it, but I do not agree on all points. As for the second (Post 235), il was nothing but a joke. My views rather concur with those of the contemporary French Philosopher André Comte-Sponville (the quote is in French)
La passion ne dure pas, ne peut pas durer : il faut que l’amour meure, ou qu’il change. Vouloir à tout prix être fidèle à la passion, c’est être infidèle à l’amour et au devenir : c’est être infidèle à la vie, qui ne saurait se réduire aux quelques mois de passion heureuse (ou aux quelques années de passion malheureuse…) que nous aurons vécus. (...) Grande formule de Denis de Rougemont : « Être amoureux est un état ; aimer est un acte ». Or un acte dépend de nous au moins pour une part, on peut le vouloir, s’y engager, le prolonger, l’entretenir, l’assumer….mais un état ? Promettre de rester amoureux, c’est se contredire dans les termes. Autant promettre qu’on aura toujours la fièvre ou qu’on sera toujours fou. Tout amour qui s’engage, en quoi que ce soit, doit engager autre chose que la passion. (…).Comme il faut avoir peur de la vérité pour lui préférer l’illusion ! Comme il faut avoir peur de la vie pour lui préférer la passion ! Le couple, quand il est heureux (à peu près heureux, c’est-à-dire heureux), est au contraire cet espace de vérité, de vie partagée, de confiance, d’intimité paisible et douce, de joies réciproques, de gratitude, de fidélité, de générosité, d’humour, d’amour….Que de vertus pour faire un couple ! Mais ce sont des vertus heureuses, ou qui peuvent l’être. Sans compter que le corps y trouve son content de plaisirs, d’audaces, de découvertes, que le couple seul, pour beaucoup, rend possibles……il y a ces deux solitudes si proches, si attentives, si respectueuses, comme habitées l’une de l’autre, comme soutenues l’une par l’autre, il y a cette joie légère et simple, cette familiarité, cette évidence, cette paix, il y a cette lumière, le regard de l’autre, il y a ce silence, son écoute, il y a cette force d’être deux…..ne faire qu’un ? Il y a bien longtemps qu’ils ont renoncé, s’ils n’y ont jamais cru. Ils aiment trop leur duo, avec ses harmoniques, son contrepoint, ses dissonances parfois, pour vouloir le transformer en impossible monologue. Ils sont passés de l’amour fou à l’amour sage, si l’on veut, et bien fou qui verrait une perte, un amoindrissement, une banalisation, quand c’est au contraire un approfondissement, davantage d’amour, davantage de vérité, et la véritable exception de la vie affective. Quoi de plus facile à aimer que son rêve ? Quoi de plus difficile à aimer que la réalité ? Quoi de plus facile que de vouloir posséder ? Quoi de plus difficile que de savoir accepter ? Quoi de plus facile que la passion ? Quoi de plus difficile que le couple ? Être amoureux est à la portée de n’importe quoi. Aimer, non.
The text you are quoting:
David,
I have nothing against mariage either, I quoted the first article (Post 9) because I found some truth in it, but I do not agree on all points. As for the second (Post 235), il was nothing but a joke. My views rather concur with those of the contemporary French Philosopher André Comte-Sponville (the quote is in French)
La passion ne dure pas, ne peut pas durer : il faut que l’amour meure, ou qu’il change. Vouloir à tout prix être fidèle à la passion, c’est être infidèle à l’amour et au devenir : c’est être infidèle à la vie, qui ne saurait se réduire aux quelques mois de passion heureuse (ou aux quelques années de passion malheureuse…) que nous aurons vécus. (...) Grande formule de Denis de Rougemont : « Être amoureux est un état ; aimer est un acte ». Or un acte dépend de nous au moins pour une part, on peut le vouloir, s’y engager, le prolonger, l’entretenir, l’assumer….mais un état ? Promettre de rester amoureux, c’est se contredire dans les termes. Autant promettre qu’on aura toujours la fièvre ou qu’on sera toujours fou. Tout amour qui s’engage, en quoi que ce soit, doit engager autre chose que la passion. (…).Comme il faut avoir peur de la vérité pour lui préférer l’illusion ! Comme il faut avoir peur de la vie pour lui préférer la passion ! Le couple, quand il est heureux (à peu près heureux, c’est-à-dire heureux), est au contraire cet espace de vérité, de vie partagée, de confiance, d’intimité paisible et douce, de joies réciproques, de gratitude, de fidélité, de générosité, d’humour, d’amour….Que de vertus pour faire un couple ! Mais ce sont des vertus heureuses, ou qui peuvent l’être. Sans compter que le corps y trouve son content de plaisirs, d’audaces, de découvertes, que le couple seul, pour beaucoup, rend possibles……il y a ces deux solitudes si proches, si attentives, si respectueuses, comme habitées l’une de l’autre, comme soutenues l’une par l’autre, il y a cette joie légère et simple, cette familiarité, cette évidence, cette paix, il y a cette lumière, le regard de l’autre, il y a ce silence, son écoute, il y a cette force d’être deux…..ne faire qu’un ? Il y a bien longtemps qu’ils ont renoncé, s’ils n’y ont jamais cru. Ils aiment trop leur duo, avec ses harmoniques, son contrepoint, ses dissonances parfois, pour vouloir le transformer en impossible monologue. Ils sont passés de l’amour fou à l’amour sage, si l’on veut, et bien fou qui verrait une perte, un amoindrissement, une banalisation, quand c’est au contraire un approfondissement, davantage d’amour, davantage de vérité, et la véritable exception de la vie affective. Quoi de plus facile à aimer que son rêve ? Quoi de plus difficile à aimer que la réalité ? Quoi de plus facile que de vouloir posséder ? Quoi de plus difficile que de savoir accepter ? Quoi de plus facile que la passion ? Quoi de plus difficile que le couple ? Être amoureux est à la portée de n’importe quoi. Aimer, non.
From A Small Treatise on the Great Virtues
Free, Mar 5, 2011 @ 00:55
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 141
Mar 5, 2011 @ 12:23
Jan 1, 70 01:00
David,
to avoid any missunderstanding: this quote was a joke. I was not referring to you, or anybody in particular. There was no message, neither implied nor explicit.
The text you are quoting:
David,
to avoid any missunderstanding: this quote was a joke. I was not referring to you, or anybody in particular. There was no message, neither implied nor explicit.
Free, Mar 5, 2011 @ 12:23
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 142
Mar 5, 2011 @ 17:18
Jan 1, 70 01:00
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 143
Mar 8, 2011 @ 21:54
2 people fall in love when they have found the best object available on the market given the limitations of their own exchange value.....Frohm
Mar 2, 11 23:25
This thread is not dead yet!
I am more and more of the opinion that being aware of the differences between men and women is crucial to find and keep “the right one”.
I know it is more complex than “Mars&Venus” (although good books) but being aware of the different way of thinking, perceiving, communicating as well as the physical and hormonal influences might help to be more tolerant (am coaching myself here).
Also keeping respect and a healthy distance within a relationship can assure happiness. And (that’s also for me) finding satisfaction beyond the couple and ensuring some emotional stability might help the mutual well being.
Easy...
The text you are quoting:
This thread is not dead yet!
I am more and more of the opinion that being aware of the differences between men and women is crucial to find and keep “the right one”.
I know it is more complex than “Mars&Venus” (although good books) but being aware of the different way of thinking, perceiving, communicating as well as the physical and hormonal influences might help to be more tolerant (am coaching myself here).
Also keeping respect and a healthy distance within a relationship can assure happiness. And (that’s also for me) finding satisfaction beyond the couple and ensuring some emotional stability might help the mutual well being.
Easy...
rena, Mar 8, 2011 @ 21:54
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Post 144
Mar 9, 2011 @ 11:28
Thanks David,
I have seen the CD several times. It was the first time that I had heard about this issues and I thought he is talking about me...
Very helpful!!!
The text you are quoting:
Thanks David,
I have seen the CD several times. It was the first time that I had heard about this issues and I thought he is talking about me...
Very helpful!!!
rena, Mar 9, 2011 @ 11:28
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 145
Mar 9, 2011 @ 11:51
mhh, nice idea! Should talk to NIr, maye he could get a buying club reduction?!
But seriously, a very good idea. Alternatively we could offer a DVD night and gather a group.
The text you are quoting:
mhh, nice idea! Should talk to NIr, maye he could get a buying club reduction?!
But seriously, a very good idea. Alternatively we could offer a DVD night and gather a group.
rena, Mar 9, 2011 @ 11:51
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Post 146
Mar 9, 2011 @ 12:33
Jan 1, 70 01:00
If it is less than 3-5 people you can come to my place. Though I don't have a mega screen (only a laptop....)
Otherwise we have to find a good place and TV and I could post the activity and care for the organization!
The text you are quoting:
If it is less than 3-5 people you can come to my place. Though I don't have a mega screen (only a laptop....)
Otherwise we have to find a good place and TV and I could post the activity and care for the organization!
rena, Mar 9, 2011 @ 12:33
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 147
Mar 9, 2011 @ 12:58
I could host up to 10 people and I've got a large screen. And a DVD player. And beer. And soft drinks. And snacks. And a knack against these Mars-Venus issues, which I find somewhat simplisitic.
Rena, I only partially agree with you say [QUOTE] that being aware of the differences between men and women is crucial to find and keep “the right one”[/QUOTE] I am rather of the opinion that we we ought to be aware of our differences as individuals, male or female, and that goes much beyond that gender bias. Mars and Venus certainly helped a lot of people, I have no doubts about it, but it equally hurted a whole bunch of others by creating questionable and missleading certitudes.
The text you are quoting:
I could host up to 10 people and I've got a large screen. And a DVD player. And beer. And soft drinks. And snacks. And a knack against these Mars-Venus issues, which I find somewhat simplisitic.
Rena, I only partially agree with you say [QUOTE] that being aware of the differences between men and women is crucial to find and keep “the right one”[/QUOTE] I am rather of the opinion that we we ought to be aware of our differences as individuals, male or female, and that goes much beyond that gender bias. Mars and Venus certainly helped a lot of people, I have no doubts about it, but it equally hurted a whole bunch of others by creating questionable and missleading certitudes.
Free, Mar 9, 2011 @ 12:58
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 148
Mar 9, 2011 @ 13:27
I could host up to 10 people and I've got a large screen. And a DVD player. And beer. And soft drinks. And snacks. And a knack against these Mars-Venus issues, which I find somewhat simplisitic.
Rena, I only partially agree with you say [QUOTE] that being aware of the differences between men and women is crucial to find and keep “the right one”[/QUOTE] I am rather of the opinion that we we ought to be aware of our differences as individuals, male or female, and that goes much beyond that gender bias. Mars and Venus certainly helped a lot of people, I have no doubts about it, but it equally hurted a whole bunch of others by creating questionable and missleading certitudes.
Mar 9, 11 12:58
mhh! So that would be interesting to follow up!
And thanks for offering to possibly host it!
Which weekday would be good for you to have such a DVD evening?
Monday, Tuesday, Thursday?
The text you are quoting:
mhh! So that would be interesting to follow up!
And thanks for offering to possibly host it!
Which weekday would be good for you to have such a DVD evening?
Monday, Tuesday, Thursday?
rena, Mar 9, 2011 @ 13:27
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Post 149
Mar 11, 2011 @ 15:09
I posted the event:
http://www.glocals.com/#/things-to-do/geneva/34140.htm
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I posted the event:
http://www.glocals.com/#/things-to-do/geneva/34140.htm
rena, Mar 11, 2011 @ 15:09
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Post 150
Mar 19, 2011 @ 16:07
Nobody is right these days. Just need to find one and then see if it works.
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Nobody is right these days. Just need to find one and then see if it works.
Dark G, Mar 19, 2011 @ 16:07
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Post 151
Mar 28, 2011 @ 12:29
Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
I still don't understand anything abour relationship but I finally write a book!!It's near done!!
An open book!!
Surprise:)
Daniela
Feb 20, 11 17:12
The book is ready but because it will be in 3 languages I'm waiting for the translation to publish it!!
Thanks to everyone for this wonderful forum!!:)))))))
I'm so happy!!So many people's answer!!!
GOOD
The text you are quoting:
The book is ready but because it will be in 3 languages I'm waiting for the translation to publish it!!
Thanks to everyone for this wonderful forum!!:)))))))
I'm so happy!!So many people's answer!!!
GOOD
Daniela L, Mar 28, 2011 @ 12:29
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Post 152
Mar 28, 2011 @ 13:20
Oh, Daniela, please also consider the forum "Are there only short men in Switzerland?" It may provide you with additional aspects
Thanks for the having raised this subject!
The text you are quoting:
Oh, Daniela, please also consider the forum "Are there only short men in Switzerland?" It may provide you with additional aspects
Thanks for the having raised this subject!
rena, Mar 28, 2011 @ 13:20
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Post 153
Mar 29, 2011 @ 19:14
Ferney, the problems are widespread and not limited to Denmark, though Denmark (along with Finland and Sweden) is among the worst...
Feb 22, 11 16:52
:-?
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 154
Mar 29, 2011 @ 20:44
I think a lot of soul searching and heartbreak could be done away with worldwide if every young person's education involved teaching them how to enjoy 'private time', just being on their own (via meditation, exercise, art, whatever...).
i think this approach, as paradoxical as it may seem, is the best way to be prepared for any relationship, to be anchored in a kind of peace that flows from self-respect and meditation and not subject to 'the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune' (i.e. not dependant upon others for the nourishing of your own self-esteem)
The text you are quoting:
I think a lot of soul searching and heartbreak could be done away with worldwide if every young person's education involved teaching them how to enjoy 'private time', just being on their own (via meditation, exercise, art, whatever...).
i think this approach, as paradoxical as it may seem, is the best way to be prepared for any relationship, to be anchored in a kind of peace that flows from self-respect and meditation and not subject to 'the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune' (i.e. not dependant upon others for the nourishing of your own self-esteem)
manics1984, Mar 29, 2011 @ 20:44
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Post 155
Mar 29, 2011 @ 21:31
Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
I still don't understand anything abour relationship but I finally write a book!!It's near done!!
An open book!!
Surprise:)
Daniela
Feb 20, 11 17:12
Unfortunately, there is no "the right one". But there are people with good sense of judgment and management skills that when they meet, they tend to believe that they were "the right one" for each other. I said sometimes ago that love affairs in the western world has become a mathematical expresion. This is so, because when the postulation is "assumed" to be true, then the couple proclaim they were a perfect match. But then, when the other vices of human reality comes into play, they tend to realize that what they had was just a theory with no real backing. Otherwise, why would over 50% of marriages end up in divorce within 3 years, and why would there be too many people not tying the knot? It is because most of the relationship do not progress to such a level... There exist too many equations to untangle the maths surrounding how to fall in love and be loved.
From the veterans mouth, "to have a perfect relationship, it is enough not to expect nothing from the other person, but to be ready to give everything to him/her".
Here is a parable for you all:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
A student asked his teacher, "What is love?"
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the wheat field, get the biggest wheat grain, and come back."
But the rule is - you can go through the field only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the field, gone through the first row, and saw one big wheat grain. But he wondered....may be there is a bigger one else where.
Then he saw a bigger one. But may be there is a still bigger one waiting....
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he realized that the wheat grains there are not as big as the previous one. He realized that he has missed the biggest one.
So, he ended up the search and went back empty hand. The teacher told him, "That is love! If you keep looking for a better one, you could have missed the right person!"
"Then, what is marriage?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the same wheat field again, and get the biggest corn. Same rule as before!"
The student went to the corn field. This time he is very careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one good sized corn. He felt satisfied, and came back.
The teacher told him, "You have looked for one that is just good for you, instead of coming back empty handed. That is marriage!"
"What is Friendship then?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "in order to answer that question, go to the same field and choose the wheat that appears nice to you. The rule is is the same."
The student went to the field. This time he is very careful. As he started scanning the field, he has picked many grains that suited his taste and come back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "You looked for one that is just nice for you, and did not look for the best. That is Friendship".
Hope you will fully understand the meaning of this parable?
______________________________________
Cheers! Bola
The text you are quoting:
Unfortunately, there is no "the right one". But there are people with good sense of judgment and management skills that when they meet, they tend to believe that they were "the right one" for each other. I said sometimes ago that love affairs in the western world has become a mathematical expresion. This is so, because when the postulation is "assumed" to be true, then the couple proclaim they were a perfect match. But then, when the other vices of human reality comes into play, they tend to realize that what they had was just a theory with no real backing. Otherwise, why would over 50% of marriages end up in divorce within 3 years, and why would there be too many people not tying the knot? It is because most of the relationship do not progress to such a level... There exist too many equations to untangle the maths surrounding how to fall in love and be loved.
From the veterans mouth, "to have a perfect relationship, it is enough not to expect nothing from the other person, but to be ready to give everything to him/her".
Here is a parable for you all:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
A student asked his teacher, "What is love?"
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the wheat field, get the biggest wheat grain, and come back."
But the rule is - you can go through the field only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the field, gone through the first row, and saw one big wheat grain. But he wondered....may be there is a bigger one else where.
Then he saw a bigger one. But may be there is a still bigger one waiting....
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he realized that the wheat grains there are not as big as the previous one. He realized that he has missed the biggest one.
So, he ended up the search and went back empty hand. The teacher told him, "That is love! If you keep looking for a better one, you could have missed the right person!"
"Then, what is marriage?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the same wheat field again, and get the biggest corn. Same rule as before!"
The student went to the corn field. This time he is very careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one good sized corn. He felt satisfied, and came back.
The teacher told him, "You have looked for one that is just good for you, instead of coming back empty handed. That is marriage!"
"What is Friendship then?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "in order to answer that question, go to the same field and choose the wheat that appears nice to you. The rule is is the same."
The student went to the field. This time he is very careful. As he started scanning the field, he has picked many grains that suited his taste and come back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "You looked for one that is just nice for you, and did not look for the best. That is Friendship".
Hope you will fully understand the meaning of this parable?
______________________________________
Cheers! Bola
Bola A, Mar 29, 2011 @ 21:31
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 156
Mar 31, 2011 @ 20:15
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Well Isabella, you will surely get tired of that and you will surely end up doing threesome and gang bangs. Admit the reality. There is limit to monogamous whoredom. Just my take.
Cheers! Bola
The text you are quoting:
Well Isabella, you will surely get tired of that and you will surely end up doing threesome and gang bangs. Admit the reality. There is limit to monogamous whoredom. Just my take.
Cheers! Bola
Bola A, Mar 31, 2011 @ 20:15
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 157
Apr 6, 2011 @ 14:44
Unfortunately, there is no "the right one". But there are people with good sense of judgment and management skills that when they meet, they tend to believe that they were "the right one" for each other. I said sometimes ago that love affairs in the western world has become a mathematical expresion. This is so, because when the postulation is "assumed" to be true, then the couple proclaim they were a perfect match. But then, when the other vices of human reality comes into play, they tend to realize that what they had was just a theory with no real backing. Otherwise, why would over 50% of marriages end up in divorce within 3 years, and why would there be too many people not tying the knot? It is because most of the relationship do not progress to such a level... There exist too many equations to untangle the maths surrounding how to fall in love and be loved.
From the veterans mouth, "to have a perfect relationship, it is enough not to expect nothing from the other person, but to be ready to give everything to him/her".
Here is a parable for you all:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
A student asked his teacher, "What is love?"
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the wheat field, get the biggest wheat grain, and come back."
But the rule is - you can go through the field only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the field, gone through the first row, and saw one big wheat grain. But he wondered....may be there is a bigger one else where.
Then he saw a bigger one. But may be there is a still bigger one waiting....
Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he realized that the wheat grains there are not as big as the previous one. He realized that he has missed the biggest one.
So, he ended up the search and went back empty hand. The teacher told him, "That is love! If you keep looking for a better one, you could have missed the right person!"
"Then, what is marriage?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "to get an answer to your question, go to the same wheat field again, and get the biggest corn. Same rule as before!"
The student went to the corn field. This time he is very careful not to repeat the previous mistake. When he reached the middle of the field, he picked one good sized corn. He felt satisfied, and came back.
The teacher told him, "You have looked for one that is just good for you, instead of coming back empty handed. That is marriage!"
"What is Friendship then?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "in order to answer that question, go to the same field and choose the wheat that appears nice to you. The rule is is the same."
The student went to the field. This time he is very careful. As he started scanning the field, he has picked many grains that suited his taste and come back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "You looked for one that is just nice for you, and did not look for the best. That is Friendship".
Hope you will fully understand the meaning of this parable?
______________________________________
Cheers! Bola
Mar 29, 11 21:31
I'm impressed...really really..nice.
well said!
Daniela
The text you are quoting:
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 158
Apr 6, 2011 @ 16:03
Well Isabella, you will surely get tired of that and you will surely end up doing threesome and gang bangs. Admit the reality. There is limit to monogamous whoredom. Just my take.
Cheers! Bola
Mar 31, 11 20:15
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 159
Apr 7, 2011 @ 10:02
It's even harder to find the right one when you're in a foreign country. Language barrier makes it pretty difficult, IMHO..
The text you are quoting:
It's even harder to find the right one when you're in a foreign country. Language barrier makes it pretty difficult, IMHO..
Andy P, Apr 7, 2011 @ 10:02
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 160
Apr 7, 2011 @ 22:06
It's even harder to find the right one when you're in a foreign country. Language barrier makes it pretty difficult, IMHO..
Apr 7, 11 10:02
It's fun to argue in French...
.
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 161
Apr 8, 2011 @ 11:08
An enormous advantage how?
I'm more concentrating on what I'm going to say in my next sentence, thinking of tenses and verbs as opposed to being flirtatious etc!
The text you are quoting:
An enormous advantage how?
I'm more concentrating on what I'm going to say in my next sentence, thinking of tenses and verbs as opposed to being flirtatious etc!
Andy P, Apr 8, 2011 @ 11:08
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 162
Apr 20, 2011 @ 18:29
Checking the best answer: to maybe publish it
Just have a look if it is ok for you to stay with your glocals names eventually in an answers book!!
all this are the answers chosen the others are coming out need time to reed all this tread!!
my book coming out in one month more or less it will be in 3 different languages (inside)!!
“Com'é difficile trovare la persona giusta ed essere la persona giusta...how it si difficult to find the right one and to be the right one, comment c’est difficile trouver la bonne personne et l’être!!”
Payot in Montreux will be the first to have my book!!
Thanks to answer to many questions!!!
So great!!
Where yFeb 21, 11 00:22
finding the right one is not that difficult!!!
people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!
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Post 2
Feb 21, 11 00:36
right person comes along when you are ready for them.. ! Report to Admin
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Post 8
Feb 21, 11 11:59
The right one comes when you stop searching.
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Post 9
Feb 21, 11 12:11
Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.
Continued...
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Post 10
Feb 21, 11 12:52
"The right one comes when you stop searching." do not help. If it were that simple, we'd all be happily married or engaged. The fact is that we are not, and therfore the problem must be elswhere.
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Post 11
Feb 21, 11 13:11
A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
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Post 12
Feb 21, 11 13:50
Now we want it all—a partner who reflects our taste and status, who sees us for who we are, who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be. You mean the small print in all post-modern relationships is, "I'll stay with you as long as you meet my needs.
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Post 14
Feb 21, 11 13:55
Thing song: "You had the best of me now that the rest of me"...The right one is the person who loves you warts and all, who's loyal and well intentioned. Who honours what you share.Many people want just the best and when it comes to the rest, they don't want to know.They move on to the next "best thing". They expect perfection, according to their agenda.In many cases people jump from one affair to the next never compromising on their quest for the "perfect partner". Or they sabotage their relationships by raising the bar ever so high or by cheating.Why ?There can be many reasons, but frankly, who cares?The sad consequence is loneliness and confusion.
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Post 15
Feb 21, 11 13:58
when I am down he has to find exactly the right words to lift me up.
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Post 19
Feb 21, 11 14:31
This is the most difficult thing about love. When you fall in love you change. You find yourself accepting things you've ever thought to accept, you do things you ever thought to attempt, you sing although you ever sang right or well and finally you think is just an evolution from you.In fact, love makes you believe a lot of things and you do not know when right or bad is.
A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
rena, Feb 21, 11 13:11
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Post 30
Feb 21, 11 15:28
Daniela when and where is the book released?
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Post 31
Feb 21, 11 15:31
.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog
the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!!
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Post 36
Feb 21, 11 17:24
Well, you may be right, but there is a time I'm not sure I'd use these words on a date "requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations" or "pathetic"
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Post 37
Feb 21, 11 17:41
'commodified relationship'? The 'right one' is whoever we choose to be in that relationship.
2 members thanked David_Lawson for this useful post
Evgenia | Stef__Granny
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Post 38
Feb 21, 11 19:13
David: Commodfied relationship. You are so right! I like the term, I hate the idea.Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story...If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece of our own jigsaw puzzle than to find a fully completed puzzle with whom to play grownup games (and no, I am not only referring to sex)So, why don't we find the right one? Maybe because we do not accept him just as he his, or because we expect her to be the missing piece of our life, or we try to coin a triangular shape in a round hole (remember those kids games?), or because we put on him the burden of being what we are not or what we would like to be, or because we do not not let give her the room to be herself and freely give us what she wants rather than what we expect, or… whatever!. But again, there are lucky people who find just that. And if you have not (speaking for myself), you better start your own journey to completeness. It may take a loooong time before you meet your soul mate and it may be much easier to create and nurture the ground on which such a relationship may blossom.
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 42
Feb 21, 11 21:00
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?DanielaGenev, Feb 21, 11 09:12
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?
I think being 'realistic' has just nothing to do with it at all. It has more to do with the inter-relationship of desire, fantasy and reality.
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Post 43
Feb 21, 11 21:06
< Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
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Post 53
Feb 22, 11 10:25
A lot of people that fall in love are not smiling and may have open minds but be living out a tragic existence. That doesn't make them any less loveable. As for "keeping", John Cleese was married 7 times and he maintains that every one of those marriages was a success. There's no doubt that listening and talking and having a semblence of dialogue helps somewhat. In an ideal situation, each partner tries to reach into the world of the other, but can of course never quite succeed. But trying is something to do.
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Post 54
Feb 22, 11 12:16
The fact that half marriages fail to stick to their choices and keep them alive, doens't make it a universal rule.
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Post 55
Feb 22, 11 12:26
"The right one" is a charachter of fairy tales. The only way of "meeting" and "keeping" the right person(for you) to spend your life with happily ever after, is being one yourself, and remaining it, refreshing your happyness and your commitment, being responsible when it's time to make decisions
480 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 56
Feb 22, 11 12: "stable ambiguity" whereby you park on the border of a relationship, neither in, nor out,on marriages between people who have a different view of things and where magic is in developing binocular vision,
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 63
Feb 22, 11 20:18
Finding the person? Easy.Recognizing they're it? A little more challenging...
21 Posts
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Post 67
Feb 23, 11 13:57
Easy to find a compromise?...sometimes it is easier to be alone
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Post 70
Feb 23, 11 14:25
The problem is too many expectations??
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Post 72
Feb 23, 11 14:37
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company?
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Post 76
Feb 23, 11 15:25
I, for one, do not want someone to love me for the 'right' reasons, but for all the wrong reasons..
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 80
Feb 23, 11 15:46The problem is not the one in front of us, but the one inside of us...
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Post 147
Feb 27, 11 09:29
I find that often, stories end badly because people tried to be who they are not. When you're true to yourself and others, no one can complain you cheated on them. how a relationship will evolve. The only way to know it, is to try it. Didier
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Post 150
Feb 27, 11 12:20
hmm interesting replies there. finding the right one...well how do you know?
…. for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else.
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Post 151
Feb 27, 11 12:47
we are all looking for "someone" who complements us...
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Post 154
Feb 27, 11 13:40
Finding the right one??? We have to be the right ones too, and once the two rights meet they have to work TOGETHER to keep that right relationship
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Post 156
Feb 27, 11 14:28
"Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it...
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 161
Feb 27, 11 14:45
. it's one thing to "want to change", quite another having the "capacity to change".
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Post 164
Feb 27, 11 14:56
"Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it, just daring to try it and see how it goes?"
I'd agree with you totally. Imagination on its own has no power. A relationship is something "to do".David_Lawson, Feb 27, 11 14:28
Shotter when he says... "...before anything can be done with reason and deliberation it must first
The text you are quoting:
Checking the best answer: to maybe publish it
Just have a look if it is ok for you to stay with your glocals names eventually in an answers book!!
all this are the answers chosen the others are coming out need time to reed all this tread!!
my book coming out in one month more or less it will be in 3 different languages (inside)!!
“Com'é difficile trovare la persona giusta ed essere la persona giusta...how it si difficult to find the right one and to be the right one, comment c’est difficile trouver la bonne personne et l’être!!”
Payot in Montreux will be the first to have my book!!
Thanks to answer to many questions!!!
So great!!
Where yFeb 21, 11 00:22
finding the right one is not that difficult!!!
people just need to be realistic and lower their expectations to reality!!!!
320 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 2
Feb 21, 11 00:36
right person comes along when you are ready for them.. ! Report to Admin
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Post 8
Feb 21, 11 11:59
The right one comes when you stop searching.
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 9
Feb 21, 11 12:11
Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.
Continued...
480 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 10
Feb 21, 11 12:52
"The right one comes when you stop searching." do not help. If it were that simple, we'd all be happily married or engaged. The fact is that we are not, and therfore the problem must be elswhere.
120 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 11
Feb 21, 11 13:11
A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
524 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 12
Feb 21, 11 13:50
Now we want it all—a partner who reflects our taste and status, who sees us for who we are, who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be. You mean the small print in all post-modern relationships is, "I'll stay with you as long as you meet my needs.
238 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 14
Feb 21, 11 13:55
Thing song: "You had the best of me now that the rest of me"...The right one is the person who loves you warts and all, who's loyal and well intentioned. Who honours what you share.Many people want just the best and when it comes to the rest, they don't want to know.They move on to the next "best thing". They expect perfection, according to their agenda.In many cases people jump from one affair to the next never compromising on their quest for the "perfect partner". Or they sabotage their relationships by raising the bar ever so high or by cheating.Why ?There can be many reasons, but frankly, who cares?The sad consequence is loneliness and confusion.
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Post 15
Feb 21, 11 13:58
when I am down he has to find exactly the right words to lift me up.
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 19
Feb 21, 11 14:31
This is the most difficult thing about love. When you fall in love you change. You find yourself accepting things you've ever thought to accept, you do things you ever thought to attempt, you sing although you ever sang right or well and finally you think is just an evolution from you.In fact, love makes you believe a lot of things and you do not know when right or bad is.
A partner who reflects our taste and status and Who loves us for all the "right" reasons, who helps us become the person we want to be'.)
rena, Feb 21, 11 13:11
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Post 30
Feb 21, 11 15:28
Daniela when and where is the book released?
148 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 31
Feb 21, 11 15:31
.... perhaps shyness plays a big part in it, maybe people should be more open when it comes to expressing what they feel and their emotions.... we're taught to supress our feelings to hide them!!! if we were more sincere as humans and expressed what we feel more openly I am sure the course of our lives would be different!Another big problem is people not willing to sacrifice.... love is not a fairy tale where the princess kisses the frog
the wife needs to be gorgeous and with certain physical features and with big boobs and so..... (this what I call people not having realistic expectations and letting the opportunities pass because they are too busy looking for a love that fits their expectations, that they don't even consider giving it a chance to the oportunities of finding that life throws at you)I know plenty of people that marry what they call THE ONE!!
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 36
Feb 21, 11 17:24
Well, you may be right, but there is a time I'm not sure I'd use these words on a date "requires sacrifice, effort, understanding, realistic expectations" or "pathetic"
524 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 37
Feb 21, 11 17:41
'commodified relationship'? The 'right one' is whoever we choose to be in that relationship.
2 members thanked David_Lawson for this useful post
Evgenia | Stef__Granny
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 38
Feb 21, 11 19:13
David: Commodfied relationship. You are so right! I like the term, I hate the idea.Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Out of the 3.5 billion women on earth, of which roughly 10% must be in my age group, I am sure than there is more than one who is Mrs. Right. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company? Your mobile rings when you're about to kiss, you hesitate a millisecond and it's already too late. The perfect moment is gone and so is your love story...If we expect our partner to fulfill our emptiness, or if we look for something we lack in her, our chances of success go down. This does not mean we are bound to fail, but it's going to be harder to find the missing piece of our own jigsaw puzzle than to find a fully completed puzzle with whom to play grownup games (and no, I am not only referring to sex)So, why don't we find the right one? Maybe because we do not accept him just as he his, or because we expect her to be the missing piece of our life, or we try to coin a triangular shape in a round hole (remember those kids games?), or because we put on him the burden of being what we are not or what we would like to be, or because we do not not let give her the room to be herself and freely give us what she wants rather than what we expect, or… whatever!. But again, there are lucky people who find just that. And if you have not (speaking for myself), you better start your own journey to completeness. It may take a loooong time before you meet your soul mate and it may be much easier to create and nurture the ground on which such a relationship may blossom.
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 42
Feb 21, 11 21:00
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?DanielaGenev, Feb 21, 11 09:12
to be realistic!!this is hard because love make you feel not at all in the reality isn't it?
I think being 'realistic' has just nothing to do with it at all. It has more to do with the inter-relationship of desire, fantasy and reality.
524 Posts
Thanked 105 times
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 43
Feb 21, 11 21:06
< Why does he simply not function as I want him to be?
524 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 53
Feb 22, 11 10:25
A lot of people that fall in love are not smiling and may have open minds but be living out a tragic existence. That doesn't make them any less loveable. As for "keeping", John Cleese was married 7 times and he maintains that every one of those marriages was a success. There's no doubt that listening and talking and having a semblence of dialogue helps somewhat. In an ideal situation, each partner tries to reach into the world of the other, but can of course never quite succeed. But trying is something to do.
633 Posts
Thanked 76 times
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 54
Feb 22, 11 12:16
The fact that half marriages fail to stick to their choices and keep them alive, doens't make it a universal rule.
633 Posts
Thanked 76 times
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 55
Feb 22, 11 12:26
"The right one" is a charachter of fairy tales. The only way of "meeting" and "keeping" the right person(for you) to spend your life with happily ever after, is being one yourself, and remaining it, refreshing your happyness and your commitment, being responsible when it's time to make decisions
480 Posts
Thanked 59 times
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 56
Feb 22, 11 12: "stable ambiguity" whereby you park on the border of a relationship, neither in, nor out,on marriages between people who have a different view of things and where magic is in developing binocular vision,
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 63
Feb 22, 11 20:18
Finding the person? Easy.Recognizing they're it? A little more challenging...
21 Posts
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Post 67
Feb 23, 11 13:57
Easy to find a compromise?...sometimes it is easier to be alone
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Post 70
Feb 23, 11 14:25
The problem is too many expectations??
188 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 72
Feb 23, 11 14:37
Love is not only a matter of person; it's also a matter of circumstances. Now the question is: Am I going to be able to recognize her when I see her? How about her? And if we both recognize each other, is it the right moment? The right place? The right mood? The right company?
259 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 76
Feb 23, 11 15:25
I, for one, do not want someone to love me for the 'right' reasons, but for all the wrong reasons..
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 80
Feb 23, 11 15:46The problem is not the one in front of us, but the one inside of us...
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Post 147
Feb 27, 11 09:29
I find that often, stories end badly because people tried to be who they are not. When you're true to yourself and others, no one can complain you cheated on them. how a relationship will evolve. The only way to know it, is to try it. Didier
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Post 150
Feb 27, 11 12:20
hmm interesting replies there. finding the right one...well how do you know?
…. for me being single now for a good few years...it's difficult to picture sharing my space my life with someone else.
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Post 151
Feb 27, 11 12:47
we are all looking for "someone" who complements us...
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 154
Feb 27, 11 13:40
Finding the right one??? We have to be the right ones too, and once the two rights meet they have to work TOGETHER to keep that right relationship
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Post 156
Feb 27, 11 14:28
"Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it...
Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 161
Feb 27, 11 14:45
. it's one thing to "want to change", quite another having the "capacity to change".
524 Posts
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 164
Feb 27, 11 14:56
"Isn't it that we're trying too much to "think" the relationship, instead of living it, just daring to try it and see how it goes?"
I'd agree with you totally. Imagination on its own has no power. A relationship is something "to do".David_Lawson, Feb 27, 11 14:28
Shotter when he says... "...before anything can be done with reason and deliberation it must first
Daniela L, Apr 20, 2011 @ 18:29
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 163
Apr 20, 2011 @ 23:49
You don't need to find the right person for you, he or she will be near you, but, only when you stop searching.
The text you are quoting:
You don't need to find the right person for you, he or she will be near you, but, only when you stop searching.
rensoli, Apr 20, 2011 @ 23:49
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 164
Apr 21, 2011 @ 12:45
The text you are quoting:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/home.php?sk=group_139045639500868
Daniela L, Apr 21, 2011 @ 12:45
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Post 165
May 23, 2011 @ 13:21
Hi!!!so my book will be on the site internet:
In Paillot (Montreux) et kiosque next to gare/poste (Montreux)!!
In max 2 weeks available!!:)))3 lunguages inside!!Italian-French and english!!So everyone can understand it!!
So Happy finally done!!
Daniela Liccardo
The text you are quoting:
Hi!!!so my book will be on the site internet:
In Paillot (Montreux) et kiosque next to gare/poste (Montreux)!!
In max 2 weeks available!!:)))3 lunguages inside!!Italian-French and english!!So everyone can understand it!!
So Happy finally done!!
Daniela Liccardo
Daniela L, May 23, 2011 @ 13:21
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 166
May 23, 2011 @ 13:42
the right ONE...surely that should be right ONES - the soulmate concept is delusional beyond words and to be frank if you were living on some island with just say 300 people you'd soon snap out of it...the theory is nice that given a large enough population there will be someone who is a perfect match...the trouble is then working through all the non-perfect people
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the right ONE...surely that should be right ONES - the soulmate concept is delusional beyond words and to be frank if you were living on some island with just say 300 people you'd soon snap out of it...the theory is nice that given a large enough population there will be someone who is a perfect match...the trouble is then working through all the non-perfect people
leo tincrowdor, May 23, 2011 @ 13:42
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 167
May 31, 2011 @ 13:00
...Voilà mon livre!!!Ecco il mio libro!!so my book!!
Salutations, Saluti, Cheers
Daniela Liccardo
Google:
http://www.culturalia.ch/47/Edition_de_livres.html
Payot Montreux
Kiosque on the right of the Poste, in Montreux next to the train station.
Cheers
Daniela
The text you are quoting:
...Voilà mon livre!!!Ecco il mio libro!!so my book!!
Salutations, Saluti, Cheers
Daniela Liccardo
Google:
http://www.culturalia.ch/47/Edition_de_livres.html
Payot Montreux
Kiosque on the right of the Poste, in Montreux next to the train station.
Cheers
Daniela
Daniela L, May 31, 2011 @ 13:00
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 168
May 31, 2011 @ 23:25
took me a while - had to go through the divorce and single parent situation etc etc first, and then decided to have some 'fun' - the last thing i wanted was another stressful relationship where i felt suffocated and had to 'ask' for things and get approval etc etc - so I met JJ who felt the same as me ( he told me he was 'in love' with someone else who didnt want him) - so we talked and talked and laughed and cried and were there for each other for a shoulder to cry on - and before we knew it 'BAM' it hit us like a brick and we have the most fantastic life together 6 yrs later - we take each day as it comes and realise that true happiness is to respect each other, laugh together, cry together, listen to each other and ensure our kids are happy - we never shout - never - theres no need. Forget the materialistic world of today - it doesnt make you happy!!!!!!! I am richer than anyone with a huge house / car etc because I am totally at peace - learn to love yourself first and the rest will follow ;-)
The text you are quoting:
took me a while - had to go through the divorce and single parent situation etc etc first, and then decided to have some 'fun' - the last thing i wanted was another stressful relationship where i felt suffocated and had to 'ask' for things and get approval etc etc - so I met JJ who felt the same as me ( he told me he was 'in love' with someone else who didnt want him) - so we talked and talked and laughed and cried and were there for each other for a shoulder to cry on - and before we knew it 'BAM' it hit us like a brick and we have the most fantastic life together 6 yrs later - we take each day as it comes and realise that true happiness is to respect each other, laugh together, cry together, listen to each other and ensure our kids are happy - we never shout - never - theres no need. Forget the materialistic world of today - it doesnt make you happy!!!!!!! I am richer than anyone with a huge house / car etc because I am totally at peace - learn to love yourself first and the rest will follow ;-)
Shauna D, May 31, 2011 @ 23:25
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 169
Jun 1, 2011 @ 00:40
You don't need to find the right person for you, he or she will be near you, but, only when you stop searching.
Apr 20, 11 23:49
Erradicate hunger? Easy: feed starving souls...
Stop smoking? Peanuts: just say no...
Quit drinking? Piece of cake: turn to (clean) diet coke...
Long term unemployment? Stop being lazy; move thy a** and get a job...
Unhappy single? So simple: Just stop looking and be happy...
Honnestly, do you really believe what you wrote? Do you really think that such ready made ideas are of any help?
The text you are quoting:
Erradicate hunger? Easy: feed starving souls...
Stop smoking? Peanuts: just say no...
Quit drinking? Piece of cake: turn to (clean) diet coke...
Long term unemployment? Stop being lazy; move thy a** and get a job...
Unhappy single? So simple: Just stop looking and be happy...
Honnestly, do you really believe what you wrote? Do you really think that such ready made ideas are of any help?
Free, Jun 1, 2011 @ 00:40
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 170
Jun 11, 2011 @ 20:05
love is just sex mispelled
the 'right one' concept is a female idea designed to keep men in their place. Seriously girls dont expect any fidelity from men - you're fighting against nature
The text you are quoting:
love is just sex mispelled
the 'right one' concept is a female idea designed to keep men in their place. Seriously girls dont expect any fidelity from men - you're fighting against nature
leo tincrowdor, Jun 11, 2011 @ 20:05
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 171
Jul 21, 2011 @ 14:08
SO Guys finnally done this hard job!!!
I'll be to hand out my book in some shops in montreux also Payot:))) So happy:))) if someone is going to read it let me know what do you think!!
Comme c'est difficile de trouver et d'être la bonne personne-how difficult it is to find and to be the right one.
My bébé is ready;)
Daniela
The text you are quoting:
SO Guys finnally done this hard job!!!
I'll be to hand out my book in some shops in montreux also Payot:))) So happy:))) if someone is going to read it let me know what do you think!!
Comme c'est difficile de trouver et d'être la bonne personne-how difficult it is to find and to be the right one.
My bébé is ready;)
Daniela
Daniela L, Jul 21, 2011 @ 14:08
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 172
Jul 21, 2011 @ 22:27
Congrats !!!
Send me the details of the book and where i can get it. :)
Cheers!!
Manu
The text you are quoting:
Congrats !!!
Send me the details of the book and where i can get it. :)
Cheers!!
Manu
Manu G, Jul 21, 2011 @ 22:27
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 173
Feb 29, 2012 @ 11:45
Jan 1, 70 01:00
Oldest Living Couple on Earth Gives Great Relationship Advice
Best statement: Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win
The text you are quoting:
Oldest Living Couple on Earth Gives Great Relationship Advice
Best statement: Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win
rena, Feb 29, 2012 @ 11:45
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Post 174
Feb 29, 2012 @ 13:50
Does it have to be the right one? can it not be more than one?
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 175
Feb 29, 2012 @ 14:15
every one is the right one.... until she sends you 1'000 texts the next day...
this one is bat shit crazy for sure:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hgrant/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like-via-text-messaging
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every one is the right one.... until she sends you 1'000 texts the next day...
this one is bat shit crazy for sure:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hgrant/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like-via-text-messaging
Charlie, Feb 29, 2012 @ 14:15
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Post 176
Feb 29, 2012 @ 14:25
And here is one how crazy texting sounds like:
http://soundcloud.com/vaughan-1-1/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like
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And here is one how crazy texting sounds like:
http://soundcloud.com/vaughan-1-1/this-is-what-crazy-looks-like
ThomasNL, Feb 29, 2012 @ 14:25
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Post 177
Mar 12, 2012 @ 21:44
“Do you know that one of the great problems of our age is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings than they do about thoughts and ideas.”
― Margaret Thatcher
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“Do you know that one of the great problems of our age is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings than they do about thoughts and ideas.”
― Margaret Thatcher
Gaini, Mar 12, 2012 @ 21:44
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Post 178
Mar 12, 2012 @ 22:57
Does it have to be the right one? can it not be more than one?
Feb 29, 12 13:50
Nowadays, people are anxious to find the "right one" but this quest puts too much pressure... nobody is entirely "right" because nobody's perfect, we all have flaws... one needs to find out which flaws he/she can take but will only know out of experience...
Luckily there's no such thing as the "right one" and there's also no "other half" one's lost without... Try to picture a fish in the ocean desperately looking for its other half that fits... that poor little fish would get so nuts that it would most probably find itself fitting in the mouth of a big white shark!
Now once you've fallen in love, and you're sure you love the flaws of your beloved, then keep in mind people are constantly evolving!!!... and sometimes not for the best... so one can only hope to evolve in the same way than the loved one... That's why someone said: "Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but looking outward in the same direction."
But 2 lovers should first of all be friends... friendship is the main ingredient to all lasting relationships because when passion of the beginning passes friendship remains and passion turns into a dearer love between 2 soulmates... I've been lucky to witness such couples within my family and there's one thing I know... it's never a smooth sea all the way... and there's a lot of hard work...
The text you are quoting:
Nowadays, people are anxious to find the "right one" but this quest puts too much pressure... nobody is entirely "right" because nobody's perfect, we all have flaws... one needs to find out which flaws he/she can take but will only know out of experience...
Luckily there's no such thing as the "right one" and there's also no "other half" one's lost without... Try to picture a fish in the ocean desperately looking for its other half that fits... that poor little fish would get so nuts that it would most probably find itself fitting in the mouth of a big white shark!
Now once you've fallen in love, and you're sure you love the flaws of your beloved, then keep in mind people are constantly evolving!!!... and sometimes not for the best... so one can only hope to evolve in the same way than the loved one... That's why someone said: "Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but looking outward in the same direction."
But 2 lovers should first of all be friends... friendship is the main ingredient to all lasting relationships because when passion of the beginning passes friendship remains and passion turns into a dearer love between 2 soulmates... I've been lucky to witness such couples within my family and there's one thing I know... it's never a smooth sea all the way... and there's a lot of hard work...
Izzie, Mar 12, 2012 @ 22:57
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Post 179
Sep 26, 2012 @ 23:09
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Re: Do you remember: How difficult is to find the right one??
Post 180
Sep 27, 2012 @ 07:04
Does that mean your book it available ?
the right one ?
Not sure she exists, that would mean there's only one person for you ?
Mine is certainly in another country then
The text you are quoting:
Does that mean your book it available ?
the right one ?
Not sure she exists, that would mean there's only one person for you ?
Mine is certainly in another country then
bertrand hubert r, Sep 27, 2012 @ 07:04
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