Buy her a "wonder woman" costume... you know... the one with "mom" pants on the outside, FMB's, and a tiara and bracelettes that repel bullets.

(just a thought)

A true friend?  Encourage her to begin therapy.

A potential lover?  Move on.

Wisdom and experience with women has tempered my idealism into a hard-edged pragmatism.

Richard Richard... not quite what i was looking for but i am more than happy to get my ass kicked trying

Naive ey!

be yourself, that's gotta be more than enough for anyone x

buy a mirror.........and hold it up in front of YOU!!

when she asks you what do you see, tell her all those good things, and then

ask her to have a look...........

Quite a difficult question, but finally something more profound than "where are the girls in short skirts with long legs". 

You can tell her that you appreciate her very much  - and here I don't mean physical aspects like "you are sooo beautiful". Rather the qualities she has and give an example why you think she has them as a proof so that it's not just bla bla to flatter her.

But if she isn't sure of herself and/or doesn't know her value, then you can tell whatever you want, she will never believe you. Sad but true.

Good luck!

Remind her how special she is to all that love her. Tell her not to compare herself to others, diversity is what makes us rich in soul. She should take time to savor all the good in her life, and learn to let go of "shit".

She needs to keep her friend close, so she can be reminded life is worth it.

Let go of the past, and not worry about the future, all she can really do is decide what she wants now. Remind her that there are no coincidences in this life. Everything and everyone in her life is there for a reason. And she still has plenty of life and love to give.

Tell her to take risks, favor fortunes the bold!

Be open minded about love, and put no limits on life.

We get what we give my friends. You want love, the quickest way is to give it

Cutting a long story short, i have a friend who is leaving Geneva and who has had a tough time of late. Her confidence has been knocked and she has no idea how amazing she is.

I want to make her last 7 days really memorable and make her realise how incredible she is.....

I know how that sounds but i dont mean it like that Gents!

Ideas please people... 7 day countdown, tick tock

contact all the people she has as friends, get them to write a (one) word that they see describes her best (or the best of her character) on a large piece of white card... then ask them to hold the card to their chest as you take a picture. then put all the pics in a large frame.... and present it to her at a surprise drinks party in her honour.

@ epicure: A mirror, you're old school man ; )  ..or seen too many cheesy movies?

I'd write on a card:

All this from a few simple images of which do little justice to the complete representation of your person. Imagine how simply overwhelming it would be for an introvert such as myself to sit in the presence of one whom I behold to be so magnificent.

Stick the card to a rose and leave it at her doorstep without a name and with if you have other plans with this "friend" of yours.

I guess I have to think of another plan for Lyndsey now...

I tried that once, mixed results at best.

Ow Charlie you are so sensitive!

(cough cough)

Women love sensitive guys ;)

As long as they are not pushing it :P

"pushing it"..... yes...errr I mean NO.... I try not to except when absolutely required.

for the mirror approach

I like Charlie too

Disagree.    Do you really want to go out with a door mat?

maitre... you were struggling to find a date and with comments like that i may need to feign shock again...

there's gotta be a balance

yes but not soppy

in regards to the mirror approach

when has sensitivity ever been likened to a door mat hayes?

Youre off on one again matey boy

maybe not for someone as evidently strapping and macho as you Mr Maitre (chicken)...

but some folk have different requirements.. bad boys get very draining after a while, wimps aren'y much of a challenge

some folk may seek soppy after years of macho BS.. each to their own...

just cause you don't want a soppy man doesnt mean someone out there doesn't

Du har bollar av mässing min vän.

Thats what the pushing it comes into account ;)

Rule #1: Don't do it in public ;)

just got what you meant.  

You got me worried for a moment that emtional wrecks are appealling

I believe there are women who are attracted to save male wrecks...

True

No idea why is that but anw... Its personal tastes i guess..

The "nice guy."  One of my favorite topics.  Time for a schooling by Kezia.

trust me this is a 2 way street

some women want to be saved by a knight in shining armour and end up with an idiot in tinfoil...

some women like trying to tame wild men, the thrill of the chase as it is..

we are all a little bit damaged but...

"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without"

God ..imagine hitting on her in a bar..she analyse your ass back out the door.

Nice rack though....

I'd appreciate the free feedback.  She normally gets paid for that kind of analysis.

Call me old fashioned... but just tell her!

There's only 3 ways in the whole world anyway that you can convey your feelings to someone:  You buy them something that shows what you feel, you touch them so they can feel what you mean, or you tell them so they can hear it.

It's not rocket science... although the womans mind is more complex than the LHC up at CERN and every computer linked to it, when you break it down they only have 3 buttons to press... a bit like a Television... you have no idea what is actually happening when you press the 'on' button, but it works and you never question how!  Women are the same: Buy, touch, tell. 

Interesting to hear if any woman out there has a fourth button! :-)

Yes, but it can be difficult to find in the dark when you're both drunk.

hate to be controversial (nah i don't actually) (typical woman) :P, however, in my experience especially as of late, men are harder to read than women, at least when a woman is pi55ed at you it's obvious, men just sulk and bottle it all up then it hits you like a tornado when you least expect it...

it's good to talk ;)

talking .... yes.....mmmmm.... sorry what did you say I wasn't listening?

Im ok with almost all the required buttons on women...but what foxes me is the damn volume button...never able to turn it down when i need it...

I think ThomasNL is not far off.  It all depends upon your motive.  The fourth button is definitely the written word.  If it's done right, she may keep it for years.

But have a good friend look it over first.

Sometimes no words at all...are enough.

Adorable.  My suspension of disbelief was very much challenged at the four minute mark, though.

You just post a thread! and she will get it straight away!

I apologize in advance if I sound bitter ... but I learned that there is no such thing as true worth. It's all in your perception, and your perceptions are subject to change. "Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder".

Carry on...

go and jums from the bridge.both of you. i don't know geneva that good,but there is a pretty small bridge accros the river. it is maybe 5 m high. so...go out with her,grab some tequilas and after tell that life is too short to just exist,you have to live it...and tell her that you always wanted to jump from tha bridge in a water...so.you just go on the bridge,take of your clothes and..JUMP! that is not difficult,but it is not that easy either. i did this 2 weeks ago. and...i just felt myself living again!

There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. Happiness is a journey ,not a destination.

eva.

Indeed, beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.

I wanted to start with the dictionary definition of true worth, but when I looked it up there wasn't one. I think that says something....

Worth to me indicates a value, I think that the value in this case is what that person means to the people around them. In which  case you can just tell her what she means to you, how she has affected you and encourage others to do the same. The written form is always the easiest, it can be planned, structured and editted and when presented it can be kept and treasured.....

"True worth" I think is more personal, i think of this as being introspective. In which case the mirror thing is a good starting point for getting someone to truly look at themselves. You can lead a horse to water you cant make it drink... the same is true for someone knowing their true worth, it comes only from self realisation.

If someone is going through challenging times or times of change and uncertainty, as friends we encourage them to think of themselves as survivors. True worth is when the person themself realises they are not just a survivor but a battler and a fighter.

oh no not another one with the journey destination rhetoric!! and im not givin any names...

watch this video clip with her...she will understand how much u appreciate her.

tony-if you want to say something to me?!-just do it?!

but better-shut up!

P.s. change your picture,chicken!

yea,such a great idea,look youtube clips with her. i think it is very orroginal! (LOL)

oooh fighting talk........

Opens popcorn bag, and takes comfy seat ready for the "action".....

dumm dee dumm

Holy crap... 

[/me googles Latvia]

She might well know her true worth far better than you do!

So mind what you are asking for: you might risk to obtain it!

still waiting for the "legs" versus "chicken" fight.....

...oh and agree with whatever Stef said...beware of women....theyre a crafty breed.

I might just get a dog, give 'm a cooky and I get all the appreciation I need. Atleast I understand a dogs needs (they were all male).

Deart Ian,

I agree with "Richardm & Samuel Hunt.

Certainly she needs a therapy because the words of a friend sometimes are not enough and, actually, can be worst as she rest on your shoulders now she is feeling down but the day she will have found self-confidence again, you will become less important for her. Trust me.

You can help but don't do too much and think about you 1st. ;-)

We are effectively learning in life by difficult moments and going out of them only with our own conviction to see a better day, fighting alone. We say in french: "aides-toi et le ciel t'aidera" means: "help yourself and God will help you". Obviously, it's not about God, it's about the fact that she will see the end of the tunnel the day she really wants it and nobody than her better than herself.

We all worth something but it takes time to understand it.

Vanessa

Eva,

Kindly, don't take it bad, but I think that the experience of a bridge and Tequila can work when you are very young and when you are still dreaming about life.

Maybe at 35-40 years old you need something a bit more down to earth as a solution.

And for everybody, Ian is looking for a real help, not crap about youtubes, dogs etc... :-(

stella,but that is the problem about sociaty in general. they forget that they are just people,they think that their very important life and job matters. but that is a big shit. you ar as young as you feel. and if you can not jump of the bridge when you are 40!-i am just sorry for that. it is sad,it very sad...

people should take lot of things easyer...

yes,and i am just 20,i know...maybe that is why i am thinking like that,but one i know,i would never like to change my view about life.

and actually..people like those who are a bit easy going and not that down to earth. but that is just my oppinion.

p.s.  my legs would win! ;)

xoxo

saucy, that one.

Eva i like your spirit...

i dont agree with the comments above that once someone realises their own worth, they regard people as less important...

i think, if anything, it's the opposite...

x

I understand. ;-) And, by the answer I thought you were young. :-)

Certainly & unfortunately, our point of view is changing about life at 30, 40, 50 years old because of experiences we made. (not always good ones...) Therefore, it's not for purpose that we are down to earth but because life is learning us to be. :-(

And everybody, apparently according to surveys, is due to make at least 1 depression in his life. That's why, maybe jumping off a bridge or doing nice & simple things doesn't appear as something funny anymore for a depressive person. (here, nothing to be with the down to hearth behaviour, of course)

BUT: we don't know if this friend of Ian is depressive, why she thinks she is not worth something, how is her life, what she is expecting about it etc... We are all giving answers without really knowing who's that person, so the topic is difficult I think.

And enjoy to have beautiful legs at 20! ;-) With the time, also that is changing!

Maybe if you could write more than 1 word at a time Richard, we could also have your point of view?... ;-)

I gave my $.02 further up.

No, your point of view on the topic I meant, not on me... :-) (funny american man)

Hi Vanessa, this bit i think is true of anyone, i think its a great observation

"it's about the fact that she will see the end of the tunnel the day she really wants it "

Someone said above you can take the horse to the water but cannot make them drink, its a similar perspective

Oh incidently my friend definitely doesnt need therapy!! 

You may post a question on glocals forum "How do you make a person know their true worth?". May be if she reads how many people are struggling to find an answer for her could work. Especially if she is memeber of glocals.

May work..

You may make someone feel special for a moment (just be yourself.. as "lyndsey j" wrote) but eventally there is nothing someone else can do.. It all depends on how peaceful that person with herself/himself (as "just_me" wrote)

Ps: It is interesting though. I guess more than half of the comments are not about the Ian's question but about something else..

Actually, my comments were in reference to the leggy Latvian.  She amuses me.

richard! -leggy latvian!.

comon...

if you would be here(where i am!) i would show you how we deal with man in latvia,baby!

:*

Is that a promise?

oh,you seem pretty self-confident!

i like it.

Can I remind everyone that glocals is not...

Oh, what am I saying?! Carry on...

Agreed.  It's not.

I'm also learning that it functions rather poorly if one tries to make it so.

Back to the question at hand.....

"How do you make a person know their true worth?"

Well the truth is you can't. That is for the individual to work out between them and their maker. 

Use your emotions like a GPS, if you start to feel bad, then ask yourself why, find the reason, use it to your advantage and move on. If you feel good then you are on the right track, try to feel even better. Sounds to simple to be true ay?

Self-worth, self-esteem, self-regard, self-respect, self-love (which is not what your thinking boys), and self-integrity those are on the inside, you have them or you don't. They can not be given nor taken away. It is part of who you are. It should of been taught to you as a youngster. It is a harder lesson to learn as an adult, and could cost thousands in therapy.

If all of this sounds a bit much....ok, but I'm not afraid to tell you all that I love myself, and the awesome life I have in this amazing town. I know my worth because I feel it every day.

Let her know that she is loved for who she is now! Help her figure the rest out, but ultimately the work to feel worthy lies with her and her alone. 

@Eva U " pièce unique " That you are and I'm lovin your attitude on this forum!