Ten Lovemaking Tips For Seniors

1. Put on your glasses. Double check that your partner is actually in bed with you.

2. Set timer for two minutes just in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting: Turn it all OFF!

4. Make sure you put “000” on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write your partner's name on your hand just in case you can't remember.

6. Keep the Polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Extra-Strength Tylenol ready just in case you actually complete what you started.

8. Make all the noise you want: The neighbours are deaf too.

9. If anything happens, call everyone you know with the good news.

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

SWISSNov 23, 2006 @ 08:54