Just a few to start Monday off with a giggle
A Polish guy went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters:
'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
"Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
**********************
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
"I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhoea in the
convent."
"Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
chardonnay."
*********************
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he
said,"CAREFUL!
Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.
TOO MANY!
Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?
Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like
when I m driving
*****************************************************************
An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about?" Asks the barman.
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky guy. Was she pretty?"
"Dunno...Never found the head.
Global Forums > General > Monday's JOTDs
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Monday's JOTDs
Jul 10, 2006 @ 11:01
The text you are quoting:
Just a few to start Monday off with a giggle
A Polish guy went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters:
'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
"Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
**********************
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
"I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhoea in the
convent."
"Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
chardonnay."
*********************
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he
said,"CAREFUL!
Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.
TOO MANY!
Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?
Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like
when I m driving
*****************************************************************
An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about?" Asks the barman.
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky guy. Was she pretty?"
"Dunno...Never found the head.
BrogstaJul 10, 2006 @ 11:01
A Polish guy went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters:
'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
"Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
**********************
Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them,
"I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhoea in the
convent."
"Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of
chardonnay."
*********************
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful," he
said,"CAREFUL!
Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once.
TOO MANY!
Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?
Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like
when I m driving
*****************************************************************
An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about?" Asks the barman.
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky guy. Was she pretty?"
"Dunno...Never found the head.
BrogstaJul 10, 2006 @ 11:01
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Re: Monday's JOTDs
Post 1
Jul 10, 2006 @ 11:44
thats helped to cheer me up a bit today. :)
The text you are quoting:
thats helped to cheer me up a bit today. :)
G___, Jul 10, 2006 @ 11:44
G___, Jul 10, 2006 @ 11:44
Your Reply:
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Re: Monday's JOTDs
Post 2
Jul 10, 2006 @ 12:21
Thanks that helps a little
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Re: Monday's JOTDs
Post 3
Jul 13, 2006 @ 19:37
I did too, what does that say about me?
The text you are quoting:
I did too, what does that say about me?
Brogsta, Jul 13, 2006 @ 19:37
Brogsta, Jul 13, 2006 @ 19:37
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