Global Forums > General > Sorry in advance for the joke below.
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Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Nov 13, 2007 @ 17:04
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a 'handywoman' and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do. 'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said, 'How much will you charge me?' The blonde quickly responded, 'How about $50? The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, 'Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house? He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?' The wife replied, 'You're right I guess I'm starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately. A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. 'You're finished already?' the husband asked. 'Yes,' the blonde replied, 'and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats.' Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her. 'And by the way,' the blonde added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a...Lexus'.
The text you are quoting:
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a 'handywoman' and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do. 'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said, 'How much will you charge me?' The blonde quickly responded, 'How about $50? The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, 'Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house? He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?' The wife replied, 'You're right I guess I'm starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately. A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. 'You're finished already?' the husband asked. 'Yes,' the blonde replied, 'and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats.' Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her. 'And by the way,' the blonde added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a...Lexus'.
philNov 13, 2007 @ 17:04
philNov 13, 2007 @ 17:04
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 1
Nov 13, 2007 @ 17:14
What's the difference between a nice girl and a bitch?
The nice girl sleeps with everybody, and the bitch sleeps with everybody but you...
Sorry, I couldn't resist!
;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll do push-ups as a mortification for all the eventually shocked Glocals...
The nice girl sleeps with everybody, and the bitch sleeps with everybody but you...
Sorry, I couldn't resist!
;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll do push-ups as a mortification for all the eventually shocked Glocals...
The text you are quoting:
What's the difference between a nice girl and a bitch?
The nice girl sleeps with everybody, and the bitch sleeps with everybody but you...
Sorry, I couldn't resist!
;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll do push-ups as a mortification for all the eventually shocked Glocals...
Syd_Brown, Nov 13, 2007 @ 17:14
The nice girl sleeps with everybody, and the bitch sleeps with everybody but you...
Sorry, I couldn't resist!
;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll do push-ups as a mortification for all the eventually shocked Glocals...
Syd_Brown, Nov 13, 2007 @ 17:14
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 2
Nov 13, 2007 @ 18:01
What's the different between a bitch & a slut...?
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 3
Nov 13, 2007 @ 19:07
to find a man that is sensitive, caring and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends....;)
The text you are quoting:
to find a man that is sensitive, caring and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends....;)
Translator, Nov 13, 2007 @ 19:07
Translator, Nov 13, 2007 @ 19:07
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 4
Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:14
"Nice girls", bitches, sluts or slags (oh, I love this word - deliciously outrageous, and good memories): be hot in this cold pre-winter! Save us from freezing! ;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll add a serie of push-up for the use of bad words online...
Syd.
PS: I'll add a serie of push-up for the use of bad words online...
The text you are quoting:
"Nice girls", bitches, sluts or slags (oh, I love this word - deliciously outrageous, and good memories): be hot in this cold pre-winter! Save us from freezing! ;-)
Syd.
PS: I'll add a serie of push-up for the use of bad words online...
Syd_Brown, Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:14
Syd.
PS: I'll add a serie of push-up for the use of bad words online...
Syd_Brown, Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:14
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 5
Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:28
alway look up...and say OMG..OMG..OMG!! Bad girl look down & have nothing to say.
The text you are quoting:
alway look up...and say OMG..OMG..OMG!! Bad girl look down & have nothing to say.
JackieChen, Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:28
JackieChen, Nov 14, 2007 @ 15:28
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Post 6
Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:38
Ok what do you have against blondes uh?
The text you are quoting:
Ok what do you have against blondes uh?
swisskiss, Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:38
swisskiss, Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:38
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Post 7
Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:46
...remember that (1) there is a number of blondes around you and we are all veeery good friends and (2) you can't keep up with us when it comes to drinking and (3) I know some things about you a certain Canadian blonde told me ;)
The text you are quoting:
...remember that (1) there is a number of blondes around you and we are all veeery good friends and (2) you can't keep up with us when it comes to drinking and (3) I know some things about you a certain Canadian blonde told me ;)
swisskiss, Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:46
swisskiss, Nov 14, 2007 @ 17:46
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 8
Nov 15, 2007 @ 15:56
Allright, Erkan Bey, you're taking it like this!
Remember how ended your last In*The*Army*Party: 60 people with hangover waiting for the policement to take their mugshots, in the tiny Republic of Boukistan, after your missed coup d'etat.
Gosh, if I remember well the blonde support crew, I don't even remember being in the plane, nor manoeuvering the T80 tank (and crushing the president's limo in a lousy handbrake parking attempt).
It's a good thing we could trade our freedom against our stock of vodka, and that we all could climb on the tank to get back home...
Too bad, you would have made a perfect president, and Rachel a perfect First Lady.
;-)
See you tomorrow!
Syd.
Remember how ended your last In*The*Army*Party: 60 people with hangover waiting for the policement to take their mugshots, in the tiny Republic of Boukistan, after your missed coup d'etat.
Gosh, if I remember well the blonde support crew, I don't even remember being in the plane, nor manoeuvering the T80 tank (and crushing the president's limo in a lousy handbrake parking attempt).
It's a good thing we could trade our freedom against our stock of vodka, and that we all could climb on the tank to get back home...
Too bad, you would have made a perfect president, and Rachel a perfect First Lady.
;-)
See you tomorrow!
Syd.
The text you are quoting:
Allright, Erkan Bey, you're taking it like this!
Remember how ended your last In*The*Army*Party: 60 people with hangover waiting for the policement to take their mugshots, in the tiny Republic of Boukistan, after your missed coup d'etat.
Gosh, if I remember well the blonde support crew, I don't even remember being in the plane, nor manoeuvering the T80 tank (and crushing the president's limo in a lousy handbrake parking attempt).
It's a good thing we could trade our freedom against our stock of vodka, and that we all could climb on the tank to get back home...
Too bad, you would have made a perfect president, and Rachel a perfect First Lady.
;-)
See you tomorrow!
Syd.
Syd_Brown, Nov 15, 2007 @ 15:56
Remember how ended your last In*The*Army*Party: 60 people with hangover waiting for the policement to take their mugshots, in the tiny Republic of Boukistan, after your missed coup d'etat.
Gosh, if I remember well the blonde support crew, I don't even remember being in the plane, nor manoeuvering the T80 tank (and crushing the president's limo in a lousy handbrake parking attempt).
It's a good thing we could trade our freedom against our stock of vodka, and that we all could climb on the tank to get back home...
Too bad, you would have made a perfect president, and Rachel a perfect First Lady.
;-)
See you tomorrow!
Syd.
Syd_Brown, Nov 15, 2007 @ 15:56
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 9
Nov 15, 2007 @ 18:29
waiting firmly to see what u capable of :) you're in for the stretcher race?
The text you are quoting:
waiting firmly to see what u capable of :) you're in for the stretcher race?
swisskiss, Nov 15, 2007 @ 18:29
swisskiss, Nov 15, 2007 @ 18:29
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 10
Nov 29, 2007 @ 14:09
Three nuns passed away and headed to heaven. When they reached the pearly gates of heaven, St. Peter told them: "to go into heaven, you must answer one question I will ask you correctly."
The first nun steps up, and St. Peter asks: "My child, who were the first two people on earth?"
The nun, smiling widely chirped: "Why, Adam and Eve of course!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
The second nun then shuffles up and St. Peter asks: "My dear girl, where did Adam and Eve live?"
The nun, beaming, replied: "In the Garden of Eden, evidently!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
Lastly, the third nun, slowly and respecfully walked up to St. Peter: "Goodday to you Mother Superior. Because you are of a higher rank, I must ask you a more difficult question... What was the first thing that Eve said to Adam?"
The nun frowned thoughtfully, speaking to herself whilst thinking: "Hm... that's a hard one..."
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
;op
The first nun steps up, and St. Peter asks: "My child, who were the first two people on earth?"
The nun, smiling widely chirped: "Why, Adam and Eve of course!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
The second nun then shuffles up and St. Peter asks: "My dear girl, where did Adam and Eve live?"
The nun, beaming, replied: "In the Garden of Eden, evidently!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
Lastly, the third nun, slowly and respecfully walked up to St. Peter: "Goodday to you Mother Superior. Because you are of a higher rank, I must ask you a more difficult question... What was the first thing that Eve said to Adam?"
The nun frowned thoughtfully, speaking to herself whilst thinking: "Hm... that's a hard one..."
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
;op
The text you are quoting:
Three nuns passed away and headed to heaven. When they reached the pearly gates of heaven, St. Peter told them: "to go into heaven, you must answer one question I will ask you correctly."
The first nun steps up, and St. Peter asks: "My child, who were the first two people on earth?"
The nun, smiling widely chirped: "Why, Adam and Eve of course!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
The second nun then shuffles up and St. Peter asks: "My dear girl, where did Adam and Eve live?"
The nun, beaming, replied: "In the Garden of Eden, evidently!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
Lastly, the third nun, slowly and respecfully walked up to St. Peter: "Goodday to you Mother Superior. Because you are of a higher rank, I must ask you a more difficult question... What was the first thing that Eve said to Adam?"
The nun frowned thoughtfully, speaking to herself whilst thinking: "Hm... that's a hard one..."
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
;op
Roberta, Nov 29, 2007 @ 14:09
The first nun steps up, and St. Peter asks: "My child, who were the first two people on earth?"
The nun, smiling widely chirped: "Why, Adam and Eve of course!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
The second nun then shuffles up and St. Peter asks: "My dear girl, where did Adam and Eve live?"
The nun, beaming, replied: "In the Garden of Eden, evidently!"
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
Lastly, the third nun, slowly and respecfully walked up to St. Peter: "Goodday to you Mother Superior. Because you are of a higher rank, I must ask you a more difficult question... What was the first thing that Eve said to Adam?"
The nun frowned thoughtfully, speaking to herself whilst thinking: "Hm... that's a hard one..."
St. Peter: "That's right. You may go in."
;op
Roberta, Nov 29, 2007 @ 14:09
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Post 11
Nov 29, 2007 @ 15:57
good one, girl !!!!
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Re: Sorry in advance for the joke below.
Post 12
Nov 29, 2007 @ 16:56
How many male chauvanist pigs does it take to wallpaper a room?
Depends how thinly you slice them.
Depends how thinly you slice them.
The text you are quoting:
How many male chauvanist pigs does it take to wallpaper a room?
Depends how thinly you slice them.
Kiriel, Nov 29, 2007 @ 16:56
Depends how thinly you slice them.
Kiriel, Nov 29, 2007 @ 16:56
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