1. You think Mulligan's and Flanagan's have a real Irish pub atmosphere;
2. You don't think 15 francs for a glass of Coca-cola in a bar is outrageous
3. You believe the newspaper stand miBen Hamiden, Ridhaght actually be under surveillance and pay the full 2 francs instead of urreptitiously putting in 20
centimes;
4. You think radar machines painted to look like lumps of cheese make them
less oppressive;
5.You see nothing wrong in having a BMW Z3 cabrio with CD plates;
6. Beggars annoy you;
7. You buy the most expensive model or variant of everything from razors to
cars;
8. You notice how dirty French cars are;
9. You live alone in a studio and have a cleaning lady;
10. You don't think it unusual that you have never met a Swiss who does
hard manual labour like road-digging;
11. You don't question why it takes 12-18 months and costs more than a
million francs to build a modest residential house;
12. You start to wonder what's wrong when a train is more than a minute
late;
13. You put on 300 francs worth of brightly coloured lycra to go for a
bicycle ride;
14. You think Swiss advertising is dynamic, clever and subtle.
15. You think it's economically wasteful to have more than one brand of a
product in a store;
16. You think getting up early is good;
17. You actually get interested in the local elections;
18. You expect the shop clerk to say goodbye after you purchase something;
19. You try to defend cartel based economics to a visitor;
20. You think that plaid jackets with flowery ties don't look that bad;
21. You think it's fair that you can only wash clothes once a month;
22. You wonder why anyone would want to shop outside of working hours;
23. You think it's OK to drive slow on Sundays;
24. You feel like you're broke if you have less that SFr 300 in yourpocket;
25. You dress up to go grocery shopping;
26. You understand why Chinese food should cost more than normal food;
27. You prefer Swiss wine;
28. You wish that your town had expensive garbage bags too;
29. You think it's OK for a Chinese restaurant to be run by a Swiss and
staffed by Spaniards and Portuguese;
30. You think Thursday night shopping is really convenient;
31. You think that large American cars are 'cool';
32. You think it's cool to drink expensive imported American beers;
33. You prefer fizzy mineral water to tap water;
34. You throw a party and expect everyone to leave by 11:30 pm;
35. You clean up during parties;
36. You expect dinner guests to help with the washing up;
37. You begin to understand the subtlety of the Swiss cuisine;
38. You appreciate the differences between the cantons;
39. You feel really hungry if you don't start eating lunch by 12:00;
40. You have breakfast cereal for dinner;
41. You don't mind paying SFr.20 for a paperback book;
42. You think that PTT approved telephones are better;
43. You buy a new one instead of getting it repaired;
44. You think that 3% unemployment is high;
45. You think it was through its own efforts that Switzerland stayed out
of World War II;
46. You consider getting goats and sheep to graze in your backyard;
47. You only eat fondue in winter;
48. You complain to your neighbour about the noise when he flushes his
toilet after 10 pm;
49. You become interested in the myriad of insurance offerings;
50. You become concerned about the color of your neighbour's curtains;
51. You put Aromat on all your food;
52. You worry about getting a cold when there's a draught;
53. You become offended when reading this.
Global Forums > General > You have been too long in Geneva when....
Only members can see names and photos
You have been too long in Geneva when....
Nov 4, 2005 @ 12:22
The text you are quoting:
1. You think Mulligan's and Flanagan's have a real Irish pub atmosphere;
2. You don't think 15 francs for a glass of Coca-cola in a bar is outrageous
3. You believe the newspaper stand miBen Hamiden, Ridhaght actually be under surveillance and pay the full 2 francs instead of urreptitiously putting in 20
centimes;
4. You think radar machines painted to look like lumps of cheese make them
less oppressive;
5.You see nothing wrong in having a BMW Z3 cabrio with CD plates;
6. Beggars annoy you;
7. You buy the most expensive model or variant of everything from razors to
cars;
8. You notice how dirty French cars are;
9. You live alone in a studio and have a cleaning lady;
10. You don't think it unusual that you have never met a Swiss who does
hard manual labour like road-digging;
11. You don't question why it takes 12-18 months and costs more than a
million francs to build a modest residential house;
12. You start to wonder what's wrong when a train is more than a minute
late;
13. You put on 300 francs worth of brightly coloured lycra to go for a
bicycle ride;
14. You think Swiss advertising is dynamic, clever and subtle.
15. You think it's economically wasteful to have more than one brand of a
product in a store;
16. You think getting up early is good;
17. You actually get interested in the local elections;
18. You expect the shop clerk to say goodbye after you purchase something;
19. You try to defend cartel based economics to a visitor;
20. You think that plaid jackets with flowery ties don't look that bad;
21. You think it's fair that you can only wash clothes once a month;
22. You wonder why anyone would want to shop outside of working hours;
23. You think it's OK to drive slow on Sundays;
24. You feel like you're broke if you have less that SFr 300 in yourpocket;
25. You dress up to go grocery shopping;
26. You understand why Chinese food should cost more than normal food;
27. You prefer Swiss wine;
28. You wish that your town had expensive garbage bags too;
29. You think it's OK for a Chinese restaurant to be run by a Swiss and
staffed by Spaniards and Portuguese;
30. You think Thursday night shopping is really convenient;
31. You think that large American cars are 'cool';
32. You think it's cool to drink expensive imported American beers;
33. You prefer fizzy mineral water to tap water;
34. You throw a party and expect everyone to leave by 11:30 pm;
35. You clean up during parties;
36. You expect dinner guests to help with the washing up;
37. You begin to understand the subtlety of the Swiss cuisine;
38. You appreciate the differences between the cantons;
39. You feel really hungry if you don't start eating lunch by 12:00;
40. You have breakfast cereal for dinner;
41. You don't mind paying SFr.20 for a paperback book;
42. You think that PTT approved telephones are better;
43. You buy a new one instead of getting it repaired;
44. You think that 3% unemployment is high;
45. You think it was through its own efforts that Switzerland stayed out
of World War II;
46. You consider getting goats and sheep to graze in your backyard;
47. You only eat fondue in winter;
48. You complain to your neighbour about the noise when he flushes his
toilet after 10 pm;
49. You become interested in the myriad of insurance offerings;
50. You become concerned about the color of your neighbour's curtains;
51. You put Aromat on all your food;
52. You worry about getting a cold when there's a draught;
53. You become offended when reading this.
zenbrainNov 4, 2005 @ 12:22
2. You don't think 15 francs for a glass of Coca-cola in a bar is outrageous
3. You believe the newspaper stand miBen Hamiden, Ridhaght actually be under surveillance and pay the full 2 francs instead of urreptitiously putting in 20
centimes;
4. You think radar machines painted to look like lumps of cheese make them
less oppressive;
5.You see nothing wrong in having a BMW Z3 cabrio with CD plates;
6. Beggars annoy you;
7. You buy the most expensive model or variant of everything from razors to
cars;
8. You notice how dirty French cars are;
9. You live alone in a studio and have a cleaning lady;
10. You don't think it unusual that you have never met a Swiss who does
hard manual labour like road-digging;
11. You don't question why it takes 12-18 months and costs more than a
million francs to build a modest residential house;
12. You start to wonder what's wrong when a train is more than a minute
late;
13. You put on 300 francs worth of brightly coloured lycra to go for a
bicycle ride;
14. You think Swiss advertising is dynamic, clever and subtle.
15. You think it's economically wasteful to have more than one brand of a
product in a store;
16. You think getting up early is good;
17. You actually get interested in the local elections;
18. You expect the shop clerk to say goodbye after you purchase something;
19. You try to defend cartel based economics to a visitor;
20. You think that plaid jackets with flowery ties don't look that bad;
21. You think it's fair that you can only wash clothes once a month;
22. You wonder why anyone would want to shop outside of working hours;
23. You think it's OK to drive slow on Sundays;
24. You feel like you're broke if you have less that SFr 300 in yourpocket;
25. You dress up to go grocery shopping;
26. You understand why Chinese food should cost more than normal food;
27. You prefer Swiss wine;
28. You wish that your town had expensive garbage bags too;
29. You think it's OK for a Chinese restaurant to be run by a Swiss and
staffed by Spaniards and Portuguese;
30. You think Thursday night shopping is really convenient;
31. You think that large American cars are 'cool';
32. You think it's cool to drink expensive imported American beers;
33. You prefer fizzy mineral water to tap water;
34. You throw a party and expect everyone to leave by 11:30 pm;
35. You clean up during parties;
36. You expect dinner guests to help with the washing up;
37. You begin to understand the subtlety of the Swiss cuisine;
38. You appreciate the differences between the cantons;
39. You feel really hungry if you don't start eating lunch by 12:00;
40. You have breakfast cereal for dinner;
41. You don't mind paying SFr.20 for a paperback book;
42. You think that PTT approved telephones are better;
43. You buy a new one instead of getting it repaired;
44. You think that 3% unemployment is high;
45. You think it was through its own efforts that Switzerland stayed out
of World War II;
46. You consider getting goats and sheep to graze in your backyard;
47. You only eat fondue in winter;
48. You complain to your neighbour about the noise when he flushes his
toilet after 10 pm;
49. You become interested in the myriad of insurance offerings;
50. You become concerned about the color of your neighbour's curtains;
51. You put Aromat on all your food;
52. You worry about getting a cold when there's a draught;
53. You become offended when reading this.
zenbrainNov 4, 2005 @ 12:22
Your Reply:
Only members can see names and photos
Re: You have been too long in Geneva when....
Post 1
Nov 5, 2005 @ 21:53
when you receive this for the 25th time since you arrived in Geneva first time and you still take the time to read it until the end to find some new point, you don't find any new point but despite that you still find it funny and forward it to as many friends as possible :-D lol
The text you are quoting:
when you receive this for the 25th time since you arrived in Geneva first time and you still take the time to read it until the end to find some new point, you don't find any new point but despite that you still find it funny and forward it to as many friends as possible :-D lol
Stef__Granny, Nov 5, 2005 @ 21:53
Stef__Granny, Nov 5, 2005 @ 21:53
Your Reply:
Only members can see names and photos
Re: You have been too long in Geneva when....
Post 2
Nov 7, 2005 @ 14:04
....i have been checked twice by an 'undercover-newspaper-surveillance-guy' to see if i actually did pay for the tribune - and luckliy for me, both times had been moments of honesty AND i had paid the full amount...
The text you are quoting:
....i have been checked twice by an 'undercover-newspaper-surveillance-guy' to see if i actually did pay for the tribune - and luckliy for me, both times had been moments of honesty AND i had paid the full amount...
SweetSwede, Nov 7, 2005 @ 14:04
SweetSwede, Nov 7, 2005 @ 14:04
Your Reply:
Only members can see names and photos
Re: You have been too long in Geneva when....
Post 3
Nov 14, 2005 @ 20:26
Here are some observations from a self-professed loud American in Geneva . . . :)
When all of your French abilities have been exhausted, and you have to resort to the shameful Parlez-vous anglais? It eventually translates into something all its own - “Yes, I am the francophone challenged American you probably enjoy making fun of, but I’d also like you to know that I do take French lessons (when I don’t cancel them. Ok, I lied - I canceled them 3 months ago), could speak Spanish (ok, high school) before French started messing with it, and was only given little notice a year ago that I’d be moving to Geneva, so could you please just stop looking at me like the idiot I feel right now?!? – Merci.”
Forget Chocolate and Cheese - It's Coffee and Cigarettes.
You’ve finally brushed up on all American history, geography, current events, the Constitution and its amendments, and international policy (OK-Iraq) just to be able to participate intellligently in light daily conversation with your neighbors.
You’re no longer uncomfortably startled when your friends inquire, “So, did you vote for Bush?” Then quizzed, “I’m not sure about the American electoral college process – could you tell me exactly how it works, and why you think America will or will not continue using it?” Wah?
After the awkward American hug / Swiss Kiss dance upon arrival at the airport, your visitors from the US don’t quite understand why you’re asking them to hop out of the car they’ve just squeezed into before you’ve squeezed into the sliver of what’s referred to as a parking space.
Getting over the initial shock at the size of washing machines, you’re then surprised at how much better they clean – which also took care of the initial , “How in the world will I ever live without bleach?”
After a while of meeting newly arrived Americans in a group setting, you realize that we do have that eerie, never-ending, purposeless smile.
After a year of living in Geneva, you make an appointment with the family doctor to find out why you’re mysteriously and effortlessly losing weight – must be a disease. Could it be . . .Applebees, Champs, Macaroni Grill, Fuddruckers, TGIFriday, Taco Bell, KFC . . . ?
Your spelling gets all messed up . . . is it realize or realise?
You’re no longer baffled how Europeans find it difficult to distinguish between American and UK accents.
You can’t speak intelligently about the other side of the lake, and the idea of traveling the 15 minutes to get there is just too much of an undertaking.
You’re no longer paralyzed on Sunday afternoons wondering what to do.
6:00pm (OK 18h00 does make more sense) is just too early to be eating dinner.
You realize that there really are “Dude Ranches” in the US – you have European friends who have actually been to them.
For one round of grocery shopping, you don’t mind traveling between Coop, Migros, Manor, Aligros, and Carrefour to get just the right brand of everything you like.
Despite few choices in any other product, you stop wondering why the nationalities of chicken breasts at Coop are something to ponder – obviously, Swiss chickens are just tastier, thus worth their weight in gold.
You start to associate being American with a southern accent and a cowboy hat . . . even if you’re from New Jersey.
When driving, you know what to do when in an intersection without any stop signs, and then glare at anyone who doesn't.
You love the “Cash” feature of the UBS card.
You start taking an interest in the UN acronyms, and the French-English differences.
You notice that Geneva dogs rarely, if ever, bark. What’s up with that?
You don’t see the logic in why the US doesn’t use the metric system.
Let's do away with all intersections - Roundabouts are great! You can just keep going round and round in circles until you figure out where you’re going.
Forget North, South, East, & West, it’s Meyrin, Lausanne, Chamonix, and Lyon.
You’re armed with your 1 franc, 2 franc, and 1 euro coins stashed away in your car just to make sure you can gain access to any shopping cart at any time.
You’re sick of your American friends and relatives complaining about gas prices, and swear you’ll never complain about gas prices again. That goes for highway toll prices as well.
You know where the cow camera is . . Actually, you know where every speeding camera is, and if “the cheese is loaded.”
It’s irritating to hear the Americanized Meyrin instead of MeyrAn, Cornavin instead of CornavAn, and absolutely cringe upon hearing “Jeddo” for Jet d’eau.
You politely accept Swiss-French people correcting your English pronunciation. “It’s twen-ty francs, not twenny.”
To avoid the embarrassment of appearing cheap by association at your favorite restaurant, you make sure your new American friends who have arrived are aware that, despite price or portion size, sharing a plate, and taking leftovers “to go” is generally not tolerated here – unless it’s really for Fido. (Then, make sure never to dine with repeat offenders.)
You come to admire a Geneva “dog’s life.” It isn’t too shabby – Fido dines at the nicest restaurants, hops a ride on his owner’s bicycle or scooter, can be found taking in the fresh air on the golf course, and is greeted more warmly at airport arrivals than any of his 2 legged companions.
The novelty of Porsche's, Ferrari's, etc. eventually wears off. After a while, you get excited over a brand spankin'new pick up truck!
You start using more acceptable British vocabulary and phrases, ie. I’m going on holiday, Kind regards, I need to get fit, That was a dodgy parking job, Don’t get cheeky with me! Golf carts are now buggies and pull carts are now trolleys (I’m sorry, but that’s just sissy.)
You stop saying US, and start saying America – despite the strange look your family and friends across the pond give you.
You appreciate a good Bush joke, and that poking fun at ourselves is not anti-patriotic
You finally get the joke . . . What do you call someone who speaks three languages? (Trilingual) What do you call someone who speaks two languages? (Bilingual) What do you call someone who speaks only one language? (American :-)
You learn that there’s no reason to be overly sensitive about it - We’re in the Club – the French don’t like anyone.
Hope you enjoyed what goes on in my head . . .
Michele
Carouge since May 2004
When all of your French abilities have been exhausted, and you have to resort to the shameful Parlez-vous anglais? It eventually translates into something all its own - “Yes, I am the francophone challenged American you probably enjoy making fun of, but I’d also like you to know that I do take French lessons (when I don’t cancel them. Ok, I lied - I canceled them 3 months ago), could speak Spanish (ok, high school) before French started messing with it, and was only given little notice a year ago that I’d be moving to Geneva, so could you please just stop looking at me like the idiot I feel right now?!? – Merci.”
Forget Chocolate and Cheese - It's Coffee and Cigarettes.
You’ve finally brushed up on all American history, geography, current events, the Constitution and its amendments, and international policy (OK-Iraq) just to be able to participate intellligently in light daily conversation with your neighbors.
You’re no longer uncomfortably startled when your friends inquire, “So, did you vote for Bush?” Then quizzed, “I’m not sure about the American electoral college process – could you tell me exactly how it works, and why you think America will or will not continue using it?” Wah?
After the awkward American hug / Swiss Kiss dance upon arrival at the airport, your visitors from the US don’t quite understand why you’re asking them to hop out of the car they’ve just squeezed into before you’ve squeezed into the sliver of what’s referred to as a parking space.
Getting over the initial shock at the size of washing machines, you’re then surprised at how much better they clean – which also took care of the initial , “How in the world will I ever live without bleach?”
After a while of meeting newly arrived Americans in a group setting, you realize that we do have that eerie, never-ending, purposeless smile.
After a year of living in Geneva, you make an appointment with the family doctor to find out why you’re mysteriously and effortlessly losing weight – must be a disease. Could it be . . .Applebees, Champs, Macaroni Grill, Fuddruckers, TGIFriday, Taco Bell, KFC . . . ?
Your spelling gets all messed up . . . is it realize or realise?
You’re no longer baffled how Europeans find it difficult to distinguish between American and UK accents.
You can’t speak intelligently about the other side of the lake, and the idea of traveling the 15 minutes to get there is just too much of an undertaking.
You’re no longer paralyzed on Sunday afternoons wondering what to do.
6:00pm (OK 18h00 does make more sense) is just too early to be eating dinner.
You realize that there really are “Dude Ranches” in the US – you have European friends who have actually been to them.
For one round of grocery shopping, you don’t mind traveling between Coop, Migros, Manor, Aligros, and Carrefour to get just the right brand of everything you like.
Despite few choices in any other product, you stop wondering why the nationalities of chicken breasts at Coop are something to ponder – obviously, Swiss chickens are just tastier, thus worth their weight in gold.
You start to associate being American with a southern accent and a cowboy hat . . . even if you’re from New Jersey.
When driving, you know what to do when in an intersection without any stop signs, and then glare at anyone who doesn't.
You love the “Cash” feature of the UBS card.
You start taking an interest in the UN acronyms, and the French-English differences.
You notice that Geneva dogs rarely, if ever, bark. What’s up with that?
You don’t see the logic in why the US doesn’t use the metric system.
Let's do away with all intersections - Roundabouts are great! You can just keep going round and round in circles until you figure out where you’re going.
Forget North, South, East, & West, it’s Meyrin, Lausanne, Chamonix, and Lyon.
You’re armed with your 1 franc, 2 franc, and 1 euro coins stashed away in your car just to make sure you can gain access to any shopping cart at any time.
You’re sick of your American friends and relatives complaining about gas prices, and swear you’ll never complain about gas prices again. That goes for highway toll prices as well.
You know where the cow camera is . . Actually, you know where every speeding camera is, and if “the cheese is loaded.”
It’s irritating to hear the Americanized Meyrin instead of MeyrAn, Cornavin instead of CornavAn, and absolutely cringe upon hearing “Jeddo” for Jet d’eau.
You politely accept Swiss-French people correcting your English pronunciation. “It’s twen-ty francs, not twenny.”
To avoid the embarrassment of appearing cheap by association at your favorite restaurant, you make sure your new American friends who have arrived are aware that, despite price or portion size, sharing a plate, and taking leftovers “to go” is generally not tolerated here – unless it’s really for Fido. (Then, make sure never to dine with repeat offenders.)
You come to admire a Geneva “dog’s life.” It isn’t too shabby – Fido dines at the nicest restaurants, hops a ride on his owner’s bicycle or scooter, can be found taking in the fresh air on the golf course, and is greeted more warmly at airport arrivals than any of his 2 legged companions.
The novelty of Porsche's, Ferrari's, etc. eventually wears off. After a while, you get excited over a brand spankin'new pick up truck!
You start using more acceptable British vocabulary and phrases, ie. I’m going on holiday, Kind regards, I need to get fit, That was a dodgy parking job, Don’t get cheeky with me! Golf carts are now buggies and pull carts are now trolleys (I’m sorry, but that’s just sissy.)
You stop saying US, and start saying America – despite the strange look your family and friends across the pond give you.
You appreciate a good Bush joke, and that poking fun at ourselves is not anti-patriotic
You finally get the joke . . . What do you call someone who speaks three languages? (Trilingual) What do you call someone who speaks two languages? (Bilingual) What do you call someone who speaks only one language? (American :-)
You learn that there’s no reason to be overly sensitive about it - We’re in the Club – the French don’t like anyone.
Hope you enjoyed what goes on in my head . . .
Michele
Carouge since May 2004
The text you are quoting:
Here are some observations from a self-professed loud American in Geneva . . . :)
When all of your French abilities have been exhausted, and you have to resort to the shameful Parlez-vous anglais? It eventually translates into something all its own - “Yes, I am the francophone challenged American you probably enjoy making fun of, but I’d also like you to know that I do take French lessons (when I don’t cancel them. Ok, I lied - I canceled them 3 months ago), could speak Spanish (ok, high school) before French started messing with it, and was only given little notice a year ago that I’d be moving to Geneva, so could you please just stop looking at me like the idiot I feel right now?!? – Merci.”
Forget Chocolate and Cheese - It's Coffee and Cigarettes.
You’ve finally brushed up on all American history, geography, current events, the Constitution and its amendments, and international policy (OK-Iraq) just to be able to participate intellligently in light daily conversation with your neighbors.
You’re no longer uncomfortably startled when your friends inquire, “So, did you vote for Bush?” Then quizzed, “I’m not sure about the American electoral college process – could you tell me exactly how it works, and why you think America will or will not continue using it?” Wah?
After the awkward American hug / Swiss Kiss dance upon arrival at the airport, your visitors from the US don’t quite understand why you’re asking them to hop out of the car they’ve just squeezed into before you’ve squeezed into the sliver of what’s referred to as a parking space.
Getting over the initial shock at the size of washing machines, you’re then surprised at how much better they clean – which also took care of the initial , “How in the world will I ever live without bleach?”
After a while of meeting newly arrived Americans in a group setting, you realize that we do have that eerie, never-ending, purposeless smile.
After a year of living in Geneva, you make an appointment with the family doctor to find out why you’re mysteriously and effortlessly losing weight – must be a disease. Could it be . . .Applebees, Champs, Macaroni Grill, Fuddruckers, TGIFriday, Taco Bell, KFC . . . ?
Your spelling gets all messed up . . . is it realize or realise?
You’re no longer baffled how Europeans find it difficult to distinguish between American and UK accents.
You can’t speak intelligently about the other side of the lake, and the idea of traveling the 15 minutes to get there is just too much of an undertaking.
You’re no longer paralyzed on Sunday afternoons wondering what to do.
6:00pm (OK 18h00 does make more sense) is just too early to be eating dinner.
You realize that there really are “Dude Ranches” in the US – you have European friends who have actually been to them.
For one round of grocery shopping, you don’t mind traveling between Coop, Migros, Manor, Aligros, and Carrefour to get just the right brand of everything you like.
Despite few choices in any other product, you stop wondering why the nationalities of chicken breasts at Coop are something to ponder – obviously, Swiss chickens are just tastier, thus worth their weight in gold.
You start to associate being American with a southern accent and a cowboy hat . . . even if you’re from New Jersey.
When driving, you know what to do when in an intersection without any stop signs, and then glare at anyone who doesn't.
You love the “Cash” feature of the UBS card.
You start taking an interest in the UN acronyms, and the French-English differences.
You notice that Geneva dogs rarely, if ever, bark. What’s up with that?
You don’t see the logic in why the US doesn’t use the metric system.
Let's do away with all intersections - Roundabouts are great! You can just keep going round and round in circles until you figure out where you’re going.
Forget North, South, East, & West, it’s Meyrin, Lausanne, Chamonix, and Lyon.
You’re armed with your 1 franc, 2 franc, and 1 euro coins stashed away in your car just to make sure you can gain access to any shopping cart at any time.
You’re sick of your American friends and relatives complaining about gas prices, and swear you’ll never complain about gas prices again. That goes for highway toll prices as well.
You know where the cow camera is . . Actually, you know where every speeding camera is, and if “the cheese is loaded.”
It’s irritating to hear the Americanized Meyrin instead of MeyrAn, Cornavin instead of CornavAn, and absolutely cringe upon hearing “Jeddo” for Jet d’eau.
You politely accept Swiss-French people correcting your English pronunciation. “It’s twen-ty francs, not twenny.”
To avoid the embarrassment of appearing cheap by association at your favorite restaurant, you make sure your new American friends who have arrived are aware that, despite price or portion size, sharing a plate, and taking leftovers “to go” is generally not tolerated here – unless it’s really for Fido. (Then, make sure never to dine with repeat offenders.)
You come to admire a Geneva “dog’s life.” It isn’t too shabby – Fido dines at the nicest restaurants, hops a ride on his owner’s bicycle or scooter, can be found taking in the fresh air on the golf course, and is greeted more warmly at airport arrivals than any of his 2 legged companions.
The novelty of Porsche's, Ferrari's, etc. eventually wears off. After a while, you get excited over a brand spankin'new pick up truck!
You start using more acceptable British vocabulary and phrases, ie. I’m going on holiday, Kind regards, I need to get fit, That was a dodgy parking job, Don’t get cheeky with me! Golf carts are now buggies and pull carts are now trolleys (I’m sorry, but that’s just sissy.)
You stop saying US, and start saying America – despite the strange look your family and friends across the pond give you.
You appreciate a good Bush joke, and that poking fun at ourselves is not anti-patriotic
You finally get the joke . . . What do you call someone who speaks three languages? (Trilingual) What do you call someone who speaks two languages? (Bilingual) What do you call someone who speaks only one language? (American :-)
You learn that there’s no reason to be overly sensitive about it - We’re in the Club – the French don’t like anyone.
Hope you enjoyed what goes on in my head . . .
Michele
Carouge since May 2004
3PuttBogey, Nov 14, 2005 @ 20:26
When all of your French abilities have been exhausted, and you have to resort to the shameful Parlez-vous anglais? It eventually translates into something all its own - “Yes, I am the francophone challenged American you probably enjoy making fun of, but I’d also like you to know that I do take French lessons (when I don’t cancel them. Ok, I lied - I canceled them 3 months ago), could speak Spanish (ok, high school) before French started messing with it, and was only given little notice a year ago that I’d be moving to Geneva, so could you please just stop looking at me like the idiot I feel right now?!? – Merci.”
Forget Chocolate and Cheese - It's Coffee and Cigarettes.
You’ve finally brushed up on all American history, geography, current events, the Constitution and its amendments, and international policy (OK-Iraq) just to be able to participate intellligently in light daily conversation with your neighbors.
You’re no longer uncomfortably startled when your friends inquire, “So, did you vote for Bush?” Then quizzed, “I’m not sure about the American electoral college process – could you tell me exactly how it works, and why you think America will or will not continue using it?” Wah?
After the awkward American hug / Swiss Kiss dance upon arrival at the airport, your visitors from the US don’t quite understand why you’re asking them to hop out of the car they’ve just squeezed into before you’ve squeezed into the sliver of what’s referred to as a parking space.
Getting over the initial shock at the size of washing machines, you’re then surprised at how much better they clean – which also took care of the initial , “How in the world will I ever live without bleach?”
After a while of meeting newly arrived Americans in a group setting, you realize that we do have that eerie, never-ending, purposeless smile.
After a year of living in Geneva, you make an appointment with the family doctor to find out why you’re mysteriously and effortlessly losing weight – must be a disease. Could it be . . .Applebees, Champs, Macaroni Grill, Fuddruckers, TGIFriday, Taco Bell, KFC . . . ?
Your spelling gets all messed up . . . is it realize or realise?
You’re no longer baffled how Europeans find it difficult to distinguish between American and UK accents.
You can’t speak intelligently about the other side of the lake, and the idea of traveling the 15 minutes to get there is just too much of an undertaking.
You’re no longer paralyzed on Sunday afternoons wondering what to do.
6:00pm (OK 18h00 does make more sense) is just too early to be eating dinner.
You realize that there really are “Dude Ranches” in the US – you have European friends who have actually been to them.
For one round of grocery shopping, you don’t mind traveling between Coop, Migros, Manor, Aligros, and Carrefour to get just the right brand of everything you like.
Despite few choices in any other product, you stop wondering why the nationalities of chicken breasts at Coop are something to ponder – obviously, Swiss chickens are just tastier, thus worth their weight in gold.
You start to associate being American with a southern accent and a cowboy hat . . . even if you’re from New Jersey.
When driving, you know what to do when in an intersection without any stop signs, and then glare at anyone who doesn't.
You love the “Cash” feature of the UBS card.
You start taking an interest in the UN acronyms, and the French-English differences.
You notice that Geneva dogs rarely, if ever, bark. What’s up with that?
You don’t see the logic in why the US doesn’t use the metric system.
Let's do away with all intersections - Roundabouts are great! You can just keep going round and round in circles until you figure out where you’re going.
Forget North, South, East, & West, it’s Meyrin, Lausanne, Chamonix, and Lyon.
You’re armed with your 1 franc, 2 franc, and 1 euro coins stashed away in your car just to make sure you can gain access to any shopping cart at any time.
You’re sick of your American friends and relatives complaining about gas prices, and swear you’ll never complain about gas prices again. That goes for highway toll prices as well.
You know where the cow camera is . . Actually, you know where every speeding camera is, and if “the cheese is loaded.”
It’s irritating to hear the Americanized Meyrin instead of MeyrAn, Cornavin instead of CornavAn, and absolutely cringe upon hearing “Jeddo” for Jet d’eau.
You politely accept Swiss-French people correcting your English pronunciation. “It’s twen-ty francs, not twenny.”
To avoid the embarrassment of appearing cheap by association at your favorite restaurant, you make sure your new American friends who have arrived are aware that, despite price or portion size, sharing a plate, and taking leftovers “to go” is generally not tolerated here – unless it’s really for Fido. (Then, make sure never to dine with repeat offenders.)
You come to admire a Geneva “dog’s life.” It isn’t too shabby – Fido dines at the nicest restaurants, hops a ride on his owner’s bicycle or scooter, can be found taking in the fresh air on the golf course, and is greeted more warmly at airport arrivals than any of his 2 legged companions.
The novelty of Porsche's, Ferrari's, etc. eventually wears off. After a while, you get excited over a brand spankin'new pick up truck!
You start using more acceptable British vocabulary and phrases, ie. I’m going on holiday, Kind regards, I need to get fit, That was a dodgy parking job, Don’t get cheeky with me! Golf carts are now buggies and pull carts are now trolleys (I’m sorry, but that’s just sissy.)
You stop saying US, and start saying America – despite the strange look your family and friends across the pond give you.
You appreciate a good Bush joke, and that poking fun at ourselves is not anti-patriotic
You finally get the joke . . . What do you call someone who speaks three languages? (Trilingual) What do you call someone who speaks two languages? (Bilingual) What do you call someone who speaks only one language? (American :-)
You learn that there’s no reason to be overly sensitive about it - We’re in the Club – the French don’t like anyone.
Hope you enjoyed what goes on in my head . . .
Michele
Carouge since May 2004
3PuttBogey, Nov 14, 2005 @ 20:26
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